Subway, Kraft Singles & Hot Pockets

  • Aired:  02/20/14
  •  | Views: 264,792

Subway removes a controversial chemical from its bread, Kraft introduces a "natural mold inhibitor," and Hot Pockets warns of recalled beef. (5:34)

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.

SO WE'RE ABOUT HALFWAY THROUGHTHE PROGRAM AND YOU KNOW WHAT

THAT MEANS?

TIME FOR ME TO SETTLE IN FROM ANIGHTLY MIDSHOW SNACK.

TONIGHT I'M GOING TO DOSOMETHING SPECIAL.

I BOUGHT MYSELF A SANDWICH FROMTHE LOCAL SUBWAY SANDWICH CHAIN.

THE RESTAURANT OBVIOUSLY NOT THETRANSPORTATION SYSTEM.

[LAUGHTER]THEIR SANDWICHES ARE GOOD BUT

THEY ALWAYS PUT TOO MUCH URINE.

[ LAUGHTER ]YOU CAN NEVER GO WRONG EATING

FRESH.

>> BIG CHANGES FOR THE WORLD'SLARGEST SANDWICH CHAIN THIS

MORNING.

SUBWAY IS REMOVING ACONTROVERSIAL CHEMICAL FROM ITS

BREAD.

[ LAUGHTER ]>> Jon: CONTROVERSIAL YOU MEAN

LIKE CONTROVERSIAL LIKE THE NFLISN'T READY FOR A GAY PLAYER

CONTROVERSY?

OR LIKE SUBWAY BRED CHEMICALCOLLECTING THE PHONE META DATA

OR DOES THIS CHEMICAL WANT TOBUILD A MOSQUE AT GROUND ZERO?

WHAT CHEMICAL ARE WE TALKINGABOUT?

>> WHAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT HEREAZODICARBONAMIDE.

>> Jon: I SEE THE PROBLEMHERE.

IF YOU CHANGE YOUR FONT SIZE --[LAUGHTER]

-- YOU CAN FIT THAT ON JUST ONESCREEN.

YOU COULD.

[ LAUGHTER ]BECAUSE ANY TIME YOU ARE USING

WHAT APPEARS TO BE 8,000 POINTTEXT IT IS GOING TO TAKE UP YOUR

WHOLE STUDIO.

[ LAUGHTER ]TELL ME ABOUT THIS

AZODICARBOMINIDE.

>> SUPPOSEDLY IT HELPS MAKE THEBREAD LOOK WHITER AND PUFFIER

BUT IT'S ALSO FOUND IN YOGA MATSAND THE SOLES OF OUR SHOES.

>> Jon: YOGA MATS, HUH?

MAYBE THAT'S WHEN EVERY TIME IEAT AT SUBWAY I END UP IN THE

BATHROOM IN THE LOTUS POSITION.

OHM.

OHM.

ALL RIGHT.

FINE.

[ LAUGHTER ]YOU KNOW WHAT THAT'S WHY I BRING

A BACK-UP SNACK.

I'LL TREAT MYSELF TO A HOME MADESANDWICH.

I KNOW WHAT IS IN THIS.

SLICE OF CLASSIC AMERICAN KRAFTSINGLES CHEESE.

>> KRAFT FOODS IS CUTTINGARTIFICIAL PRESERVATIVES FROM

INDIVIDUALLY WRAPPED CHEESESLICES.

THEY ARE REPLACING THE ASORBICACID WITH SOMETHING THEY SAY IS

A NATURAL MOLD INHIBITOR.

>> Jon: I'M SO HUNGRY.

A MOLD INHIBITOR.

KRAFT AMERICAN SINGLES DON'TNEED MOLD INHIBITORS THEY DON'T

GO BAD BY DEFINITION BECAUSETHEY ARE AMERICAN.

AS A MATTER OF FACT.

MY GRANDFATHER GAVE ME THESESLICES WHEN I WAS SEVEN.

[ LAUGHTER ]I JUST LOVE MY COUNTRY'S CHEESE.

DESPERATE TIMES CALL FORDESPERATE MEASURES PEOPLE.

I'M GOING TO HAVE TO DIG INTO MYEMERGENCY FOOD RESERVE.

[ LAUGHTER ]HELLO HOTPOCKET.

[ LAUGHTER ]HELLO

HOT POCKET, TRUSTED FRIEND.

[ LAUGHTER ]YOUR TIME HAS FINALLY --

[LAUGHTER]BOY I HOPE THEY GO TO A ROLL.

>> NESTLE USA ISSUING AVOLUNTARILY RECALL OF CERTAIN

HOT POCKETS.

>> THE FOOD COMPANY SAYS THEYCONTAIN A SMALL AMOUNT OF

RECALLED BEEF.

>> Jon: OH, MY GOD!

I HAD NO IDEA THEY PUT ACTUALBEEF IN THESE.

[ LAUGHTER ]I THOUGHT THE INSIDES WERE JUST

STUFF THEY FOUND IN THEIRPOCKETS.

[LAUGHTER]MAYBE IT'S NOT THE VARIETY OF

HOT POCKET THAT I BUY.

MAYBE THAT HASN'T BEEN RECALLED.

MAYBE IT WAS JUST THE QUESOCHICKEN VARIETY OR BBQ WITH

CHICKEN VARIETY OR PEPPERONIPIZZA VARIETY OR THE NEW HAM AND

BOTTLE CAPS OR LINT AND CANADIANPENNY AS LONG AS IT'S NOT MY

DARLING PHILLY CHEESE STEAK.

>> THE RECALL EFFECTS PHILLYSTEAK AND CROISSANT CRUST >>CROISSANT CRUST PHILLY CHEESESTEAKS?

YEAH IT'S A GREAT IDEACOMBINING THE CLASSIC PHILLYSTREET FOOD WITH THE BREAD ITWOULD LIKE

TO BEAT THE [BLEEP] OUT OF. HOWABOUT YOU COME OVER HERE ANDI'LL BEAT YOUR (bleep) FRENCH

ASS.

THAT'S SORT OF A PHILADELPHIAACCENT.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS BEEF?

>> THEY MAY CONTAIN MEAT FROMRANCHO FEEDING CORPORATION WHICH

IS RECALLING NEARLY 9 MILLIONPOUNDS BEEF THAT REGULATORS SAY

CAME FROM DISEASED AND UNSOUNDANIMALS.

>> Jon: UNSOUND.

UNSOUND COWS, COWS LOSING THEIRMARBLES.

LIKE THE KIND OF COW THAT WOULDSHOOT REAGAN TO GET JODI

FOSTER'S ATTENTION?

SHE'S NOT IMPRESSED COW.

MY GUESS IS MOST COWS IN THESLAUGHTERHOUSE ENVIRONMENT ARE

GOING TO EXHIBIT UNSOUNDBEHAVIOR.

I GUESS I HAVE TO MAIL MY HOTPOCKET BACK FOR THE RECALL.

LUCKILY YOU DON'T HAVE TO BUY ASEPARATE ENVELOPE.

YOU CAN JUST -- WE'LL BE RIGHTBACK.

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