Fox News Welfare Academy

  • Aired:  03/13/14
  •  | Views: 511,440

Fox News resorts to hyperbole and anecdotal evidence to educate the public about food stamp fraud. (4:58)

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]>> Jon: HEY, WELCOME TO "THE

DAILY SHOW".

MY NAME JON STEWART.

GOOD PROGRAM FOR YOU TONIGHT.

ANITA HILL IS JOINING US.

SHE'S THE SUBJECT OF THE NEWDOCUMENTARY "ANITA."

SHE'LL BE JOINING US.

LAST WEEK WE MENTIONED ON THESHOW THAT WHATEVER THIS FOX NEWS

THEY SPEND A LOT OF TIME ON HOWPOOR PEOPLE IN THIS COUNTRY ARE

GAMING THE SYSTEM AND ABUSINGTHE AMERICAN TAXPAYERS TO

MAINTAIN THEIR SURPRISINGLYRAVENOUS SEAFOOD ADDICTIONS.

>> PEOPLE USING FOOD STAMPS TOBUY GOURMET CRAB LEGS.

>> YOU CAN USE EBT CARDS AT THEORGANIC MARKET IN THE EAST

VILLAGE. YOU CAN GETORGANIC WILD SALMON. IT'SINSANITY.

>> Jon: THEY CAN GET WILD SALMONIN THE EAST VILLAGE. I HAVEALWAYS SAID

POOR PEOPLE'S SALMON SHOULD COMEIN A CAN FROM AN OUTER BOROUGH.

I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW YOUNG ILOOKED.

BEEN A TOUGH WEEK.

[LAUGHTER]ANYWAY APPARENTLY THISCOMPLETELY

APPROPRIATE OBSERVATION DREWTHE IRE OF ONE ERICLES

BOLLINGSWORTH.

>> TAKE A LISTEN TO JON STEWARTMOCKING ALL OF US AT FOX NEWS

FOR SHEDDING LIGHT ONFOOD STAMP ABUSE.

LET ME SCHOOL YOU, MR. STEWART.

>> Jon: OH, SCHOOL.

[ LAUGHTER ][CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

I'M READY FOR CLASS PROFESSOR.

WAIT.

[ LAUGHTER ]FOR YOU. SCHOOL ON PROFESSOR.

>> WE'RE TALKING ABOUT THEWASTE, FRAUD, AND ABUSE IN A LOT

OF THE PROGRAMS.

>> Jon: OH I'M SORRY. I SEE THEDISCONNECT.

YOU THOUGHT WE WERERIDICULING YOU FOR EXPOSING

GOVERNMENT WASTE. NO, THAT'S AREASONABLE THING TO EXPOSE.

WE WERE RIDICULING THE WAY YOUEXAGGERATE THE SCOPE OF PUBLIC

ASSISTANCE ABUSE THROUGH RANDOMOFTEN UNPROVABLE ANECDOTES,HOUR

LONG SPECIALS AND FOR SOMEREASON THIS HAND BURSTING

THROUGH THE HEART OF AMERICANBEFORE APPRENTLY REACHING INTO

AMERICA'S POCKETS FOR TAX PAYERLOBSTER AND TITTY BAR MONEY.

GET A JOB YOU TITTY BAR LOBSTEREATING HAND.

[LAUGHTER]YOU SEE YOUR FAIR NETWORK

HAS CREATED THE VERYBALANCED NARRATIVE THAT

TIES PEOPLE'S POVERTY TO THEIROWN LACK OF VIRTUE AND SAYS

THAT PROGRAMS CREATED TO SERVETHE IMPOVERISHED

ARE IN FACT THE REASON THATTHOSE ARE STILL IMPOVERISHED.

SORT OF IDEA IF THEY WEREN'TSUCH (bleep) PEOPLE THEY

WOULDN'T BE POOR AND THOSE FOODSTAMPS ARE JUST MAKING THEM

(bleep).

OF COURSE, YOU DIDN'T SAY IT SO

ELEGANTLY.

>> FOOD STAMP ABUSERS, FEEDINGON TAXPAYERS.

>> AMERICA'S POOR ARE ACTUALLYLIVING THE GOOD LIFE.

>> AMERICA'S CULTURE OFDEPENDENCY.

>> OUR LIBERAL GOVERNMENT ISTEACHING OUR KIDS TO BE TAKERS

INSTEAD OF MAKERS.

>> MOOCHERS.

>> PARASITES SUCKING OFF THENIPPLE OF THE GOVERNMENT.

>> FREELOADING.>> DRAINING THIS SOCIETY.

>> 99% OF THEM HAVE AREFRIGERATOR.

>> Jon: WHAT?

( LAUGHTER ).

YES, YOU KNOW, I DON'T

THINK I'M GOING TO FINISH THISMILK

TODAY.

I'M GOING TO PUT IT BACK IN HEREUNTIL TOMORROW.

IT'S GOOD TO BE THE KING.

[LAUGHTER]NOT THAT YOU DON'T HAVE YOUREXAMPLES

OF FOOD STAMP WASTE, FRAUD, ANDABUSE LIKE THIS GUY, SURFER GUY

HE'S IN SOME BAND AND HIS FOODSTAMP CRIMES WERE SO EGREGIOUS

HE WAS FEATURED ON SIXDIFFERENT FOX SHOWS.

>> HE USED HIS EBT CARD, HEWALKED INTO THE SUPERMARKET AND

BOUGHT LOBSTER.

>> THIS GUY SAY PARASITE.HE IS A RAT.

>> Jon: WELL, TECHNICALLY YOUARE EITHER A RAT OR A PARASITE

YOU CAN'T BE BOTH.

A RAT IS A SCAVENGER WHO COULDCARRY PARASITES. IN FACT,

IF YOU WATCH THE SHOW SKIPPY ANDTHE TICK IT'S ABOUT A FASTIDIOUS

MOUSE WHO LIVES WITH A VERYSLOPPY TICK. HE GETS INTO

NICKELODEAN NEVER PICKED IT UP.

IT WAS A KIDS SHOW.

I THOUGHT IT WAS GOLD. I STILLHAVE THE STORY BOARDS.

MY POINT IS THIS.

CONGRATULATIONS ON FINDING YOURFOOD STAMP ABUSE BIGFOOT.

THAT ONE GUY YOU FOUND ISCERTAINLY NOT SOMEONE THAT THE

FOOD STAMP PROGRAM ITSELF WOULDPROBABLY POINT TO AS ITS

GREATEST SUCCESS STORY BUT WEMAKE FUN OF YOU NOT FOR FINDING

HIM BUT FOR PRETENDING THAT HESOMEHOW REPRESENTS LITERALLY

MILLIONS OF AMERICANS.

I KNOW I'M BEING PURPOSEFULLYHYPERBOLIC.

>> HE IS THE REPRESENTATIVE OFLITERALLY MILLIONS OF AMERICANS.

>> Jon: SORRY I MEANT HYPERBOLLING.

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