Mother F#@kers

  • Aired:  02/22/11
  •  | Views: 224,798

House Republicans want to cut funding for Planned Parenthood, which is apparently in the abortion business for profit. (3:46)

NAUSEOUS?

(LAUGHTER)

THE SEASON OF FISCAL DISCIPLINE.

HOUSE REPUBLICANS ARE

DISCOVERING CUTTING SPENDING

ISN'T AS EASY AS THEY HOPED.

IT TURNS OUT PEOPLE LIKE SOME OF

THE THINGS GOVERNMENT DOES FOR

THEM.

LUCKILY THE REPUBLICANS HAVE

COME UP WITH A BRILLIANT IDEA.

WHAT IF INSTEAD OF CULTING

SERVICES FOR POOR PEOPLE, THEY

CUT SERVICES FOR WOMEN?

>> $747 MILLION IN CUTS TO THE

NUTRITION PROGRAM FOR WOMEN,

INFANTS, AND CHILDREN.

>> CUTTING MORE THAN A BILLION

DOLLARS FROM THE HEAD START

EDUCATION PROGRAM.

>> ONE OF THE BILLS ELIMINATES

TAX BREAKS FOR PRIVATE EMPLOYERS

WHO PROVIDE HEALTH COVERAGE IF

THEIR PLANS OFFER ABORTION

SERVICES.

>> ALLOWING HOSPITALS TO REFUSE

TO PERFORM AN ABORTION ON A

WOMAN EVEN IF SHE'LL DIE.

(AUDIENCE REACTS)

(BOOS)

>> Jon: WOW, THAT'S SO PRO-LIFE

EVEN IF IT KILLS YOU.

(LAUGHTER)

SO THEY WANT TO CUT EVERYTHING

FROM FAMILY CARE TO PRENATAL

CARE TO...

(LAUGHTER)

CHILD NUTRITION.

IT'S LIKE THE REPUBLICANS ARE

SAYING YOU CAN'T PREVENT AN

UNWANTED CHILD, YOU CAN'T GET

CARE IF YOU DO GET PREGNANT AND

WE WON'T GIVE YOU ANY HELP

FEEDING THE KID AFTER IT'S BORN.

BUT THOSE TWO MINUTES WHEN THAT

SKULL IS CROWNING, YOUR BABY'S

THE MOST PRECIOUS THING ON

EARTH.

(LAUGHTER)

MUCH OF THE G.O.P. FOCUS IS ON

PLANNED PARENTHOOD WHICH, TO

HEAR THEM TELL IT, IS APPARENTLY

IN THE ABORTION BUSINESS FOR AN

UNUSUAL REASON.

>> PLANNED PARENTHOOD ISN'T

ABOUT HEALTH, IT'S ABOUT PROFIT.

THEIR FOCUS ON BECOMING BIG

BUSINESS.

>> THEY REPORTED A $63 BILLION

PROFIT.

>> THEY MAKE MONEY ON THE

ABORTIONS.

>> Jon: THAT'S RIDICULOUS.

EVERYONE KNOWS PLANNED

PARENTHOOD DOESN'T MAKE MONEY ON

THE ABORTIONS.

IT'S THE CONCESSIONS.

(LAUGHTER)

THAT'S WHERE THE MONEY IS.

YOUR JUNIOR MINTS, YOUR NACHOS.

WHO NEEDS THAT BIG A DRINK TO GO

IN?

PLANNED PARENTHOOD'S INSIDIOUS

PROFITEERING DOES NOT END THERE.

>> THE PLANNED PARENTHOOD

OPERATION IN MY STATE OF

MINNESOTA SAID THEY RECENTLY

OPENED THREE EXPRESS CENTERS IN

WELLESLEY MINNESOTA... WEALTHY

MINNESOTA SUBURBS AND SHOPPING

CENTERS AND MALLS AND PLACES

WHERE WOMEN ARE ALREADY DOING

THEIR GROCERY SHOPPING, PICKING

UP STARBUCKS, LIVING THEIR DAILY

LIVES AND STOPPING OFF FOR AN

ABORTION.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: SOME OF THEM AREN'T EVEN

PREGNANT.

(LAUGHTER)

IT'S JUST SO DAMN CONVENIENT.

IT'S LIKE THEM ANTIANN'S PREL

SETHS.

YOU'RE NOT PLANS ON EATING ONE

BUT IT'S RIGHT ACROSS FROM

ABERCROMBIE.

I HAD NO IDEA WHY SO MANY... SO

MANY MALL ABORTIONS WERE GOING

ON.

IS THAT WHY STORES HAVE THOSE

NAMES LIKE LINENS AND THINGS,

BED BATH & BEYOND DAVID AND...

NOW, THE VAST MAJORITY OF

PLANNED PARENTHOOD SERVICES ARE

NON-ABORTION RELATED.

THERE'S ALREADY A LAW IN PLACE

TO HIDE AMENDMENTS THAT ENSURES

NONE OF THE FEDERAL FUNDING IT

RECEIVES TO K GO TOWARDS

ABORTIONS.

THAT'S NOT THE POINT.

>> PLANNED PARENTHOOD AND ITS

DEFENDERS WILL CLAIM THE MONEY

THEY'VE RECEIVED FROM THE

GOVERNMENT HAS NOT BEEN USED TO

FUND ABORTIONS.

BUT THAT'S ONLY TECHNICALLY

TRUE.

>> Jon: YES, TECHNICALLY TRUE.

ALSO KNOWN AS TRUE.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT GO ON.

>> THERE'S NO QUESTION THE

TAXPAYER DOLLARS RECEIVED BY

PLANNED PARENTHOOD ARE USED TO

COVER ALLOWED EXPENSES LIKE

OVERHEAD, OPERATIONAL COSTS,

THUS FREEING UP OTHER MONEY FOR

THE CLINICS THAT DO PROVIDE

ABORTIONS.

>> IT'S LIKE A SHELL GAME.

EXCEPT INSTEAD OF A BALL

UNDERNEATH A WALNUT SHELL IT'S

WOMB INSTEAD OF...

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