The NCAA's Perfectly Fair Rules

  • Aired:  04/11/13
  •  | Views: 148,534

Aasif Mandvi tests the NCAA's image as a disinterested steward of amateur athletics protecting college sports from the corrosive influences of commercialism. (6:01)

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.

OH, DOCTOR!

NOW LOUISVILLE'S BIG WIN OVER

MICHIGAN MONDAY NIGHT ENDING A

THRILLING NCAA TOURNAMENT WHICH

SAW EVEN SAVVY BRACKET

PROGNOSTICATORS COMPLETELY

SCREWED BY PRODUCTION ASSISTANT

JAY FRANKLIN WHO, THINK WE CAN

ALL ADMIT GOT COMPLETELY

(bleep) LUCKY.

I MEAN, NOTE TO SELF: FIRE JAY

FRANKLIN.

DESPITE THE NCAA'S GOOD WORKS

THERE ARE THOSE WHO WOULD TRY TO

TEAR THEM DOWN.

ASSIF MANDVI HAS MORE.

>> COLLEGE ATHLETES THEY ARE

PRINCES OF THEIR SCHOOLS AND

ENJOY EVERYTHING FROM THE LOVE

OF ENTHUSIASTIC COACHES FROM ALL

THE ATTENTION THEY GET WHEN THEY

TWIST THEIR POOR LITTLE ANKLE

OUT OF THEIR SKIN.

BUT THERE'S SOME STUDENTS LIKE

THIS UNIVERSITY OF MINNESOTA

WRESTLER WHO WOULD SPIT IN THE

FACE OF NCAA AND DEFY THEIR

PERFECTLY FAIR RULES.

>> MY ELIGIBILITY GOT TAKEN

AWAY.

IT GOT SWIPED.

I COULDN'T COMPETE FOR THE

UNIVERSITY OF MINNESOTA.

>> WHY DID THEY STRIP YOU OF

ELIGIBILITY.

>> I HAD A PHONE AND MY NAME WAS

ON IT.

>> WHY DID YOU THINK YOU COULD

USE YOUR OWN NAME.

>> IT'S MY MESSAGE AND IT'S ME.

>> IT'S NOT YOUR NAME.

IT BELONGS TO THE NCAA.

>> THE NCAA RULES SAY ATHLETES

CAN'T PROFIT BY USING THEIR OWN

NAME IN A SONG THAT THEY WROTE

THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH

SPORTS.

DON'T FORGET THE NCAA IS GIVING

THEM THE GIFT OF EDUCATION.

>> I HAVE 10% SCHOLARSHIP.

THAT DOESN'T COVER A LOT AND ON

TOP OF THAT A COVER MY LIVING

EXPENSES.

>> AND YOU ARE MAKING A BUTT

LOAD OF MONEY ON THE SONG.

>> THE SONG HASN'T MADE ME RICH.

I HAVEN'T EVEN BROKEN EVEN.

THE NCAA OWNS THE NAME JOEL

BAUMAN.

>> YOU ARE RAPPING UNDER THE

NAME JOEL BAUMAN, THAT'S THE

ACCOUNTANT OF THE RECORD LABEL.

THE NCAA WANTS TO DISTANCE

THEMSELVES FROM HIS GANGSTA RAP

STYLE.

>> PUT YOUR ONES UP IF YOU WANT

YOUR DREAMS RIGHT NOW.

>> BUT YOU ARE A GOOD WRESTLER

THOUGH RIGHT?

>> I LIKE TO ASSUME SO.

>> GOOD, GOOD, GOOD.

I MEAN YOU ARE GOING TO KEEP

WRESTLING, RIGHT?

>> GOOD, GOOD.

>> YES THIS TYPE OF PROFITING

WOULD SULLY THE NCAA'S IMAGE AS

STEWARDS OF ATHLETICS THE

MISSION IS TO EXROA TECT COLLEGE

SPORTS FROM THE INFLUENCES OF

COMMERCIALISM AND UPHOLD THE

IDEAL OF THE STUDENT ATHLETE WHO

SIMPLY PLAYS FOR THE LOVE OF

SPORT.

BUT EXUCLA BASKETBALL PLAYER ED

O'BANON THINK HE HE IS ENTITLED TO

MORE.

>> I THINK COLLEGE ATHLETES

SHOULD BE COMPENSATED.

>> WHAT FOR?

>> BECAUSE THERE IS AN

UNBELIEVABLE AMOUNT OF MONEY,

BILLIONS OF DOLLARS BEING MADE

OFF THE BACKS OF THESE ATHLETES

AND EVERYONE SEEMS TO BE

COMPENSATED EXCEPT FOR THE ONES

DOING THE WORK.

>> OH, REALLY BILLIONS OF

DOLLARS.

OUR RESEARCH SHOWS THAT THE

NCAA'S TOTAL REVENUE IS ONLY $6

BILLION SO IT'S NOT THAT MANY

BILLIONS.

AND THOSE ONE SHINING MOMENT

MONTAGES DON'T PAY FOR

THEMSELVES.

WE CAN'T SHOW YOU ANY OF THOSE

BECAUSE THE NCAA WON'T LICENSE

IT TO US.

INSTEAD WE BRING YOU THIS.

♪ IT'S ONE SHINING MOMENT IT'S

ALL ON THE LINE ♪

♪ IT'S FROZEN IN -- OKAY YOU GET

THE IDEA.

SOMEHOW O'BANON IS STILL

UNGRATEFUL AND SUING HIM FOR

USING HIS LIKENESS IN THEIR ONE

MINOR LITTLE VIDEO GAME.

NO, NOT THAT ONE.

NO THE OTHER PLATFORM.

NOT THE Wii, NOT THE XBOX.

YES, THIS ONE, THAT ONE.

I'M A VIDEO GAME.

LAST AIR BENDER.

I'M IN IT.

NOBODY HAS PLAYED IT.

>> DID YOU GET PAID.

>> YEAH I GOT PAID (bleep) I'M

NOT A SCHUM SCHMUCK.

>> I STAND BY MY LAWSUIT.

I STAND BY IT.

>> I COULDN'T BELIEVE THEY WERE

SLAMMING THIS OPEN INSTITUTION

SO I WENT TO THE NCAA TO LET

THEM RESPOND.

I WANT TO SIT DOWN WITH YOU TO

GIVE YOU A CHANCE TO CLEAR YOUR

GOOD NAME.

FIRST QUESTION: WHY AM I

TALKING TO A TELEPHONE?

>> THE NCAA IS NOT GRANTING ANY

ONCAMERA INTERVIEWS AT THIS

TIME.

>> WHAT ARE YOU PHILIP MORRIS?

I HAVE SPOKEN TO A GUY WHO MAKES

ASBESTOS.

YOU ARE THE NCAA.

>> OUR MISSION IS TO BE AN

INTEGRAL PART OF HIGHER

EDUCATION AND TO FOCUS ON THE --

>> IS THIS EVEN THE NCAA I'M

TALKING TO?

>> NO THIS IS YOUR INTERN ERIC.

I'M JUST READING A STATEMENT

THEY GAVE US.

>> WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE,

THE ATHLETES KNOW THAT THE NCAA

WILL TAKE GOOD CARE OF THEM.

>> I ACTUALLY JUST CAME BACK.

I WAS OUT FOR THREE MONTHS WITH

A CONCUSSION.

>> BUT THE SCHOOL WILL COVER THE

EXPENSES SHOULD THIS LEAD TO ANY

EXPENSES AFTER YOU GRADUATE,

RIGHT?

>> NO, BECAUSE I WON'T BE AN

ATHLETE FOR THEM ANYMORE.

>> ARE YOU (bleep) KIDDING ME.

OKAY, I THINK I UNDERSTAND WHY

THEY DON'T WANT TO TALK US TO.

>> YEAH, THEY ARE KIND OF

DOUCHEBAGS.

♪ IT'S ONE SHINING MOMENT ♪

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