Kosher Pickle

  • Aired:  06/26/12
  •  | Views: 24,699

Prompted by a Hebrew National scandal, Jon performs a 100%-certified kosher hot dog bris for a lovely Jewish couple. (3:36)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.

TIME NOW TO ISSUES OF GREATER IMPORTANCE.

I'M TALKING ABOUT HOT DOGS.

A SCANDAL ROCKING BACKYARD BARBECUES ACROSS THIS GREAT NATION.

>> Reporter: HEBREW NATIONAL THE HOT DOG MAKER THAT'S LONG CLAIMED TO ANSWER TO A HIGHER

AUTHORITY MUST NOW ANSWER TO CHARGES OF FALSE ADVERTISING.

A CLASS ACTION LAWSUIT AGAINST CONAGRA FOOD CONTAINS HOT DOGS AND OTHER MEAT PRODUCTS SOLD

UNDER ITS HEBREW NATIONAL BRAND AREN'T 100% KOSHER AS ADVERTISED.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: NOT 100% KOSHER.

OR AS IT'S KNOWN TO JEWS, NOT KOSHER.

(LAUGHTER) HOW CAN A HOT DOG NOT BE KOERBER?

EXCEPT FOR THE RATS THAT FELT INTO THE MEAT PULVERIZER HAVE KHROEFB HAO *FS?

DID ONE OF THE POSSUMS HAVE A TATTOO ON ITS ANUS?

DID THE PINK SLIME GO OUT FOR A LOBSTER DINNER?

UNDER TALMUDIC LAW THAT'S A BIG NO-NO.

AT ANY RATE, THE NOTION SOME PEOPLE MAY HAVE UNKNOWINGLY EATEN HOT DOGS NAMED FROM COWS

NOT SLAUGHTERED IN A MANNER PRESCRIBED BY JEWISH LAW IS ENOUGH TO MAKE ONE NAUSEOUS.

(LAUGHTER) LUCKILY, THERE IS ONE SURE FIRE WAY TO GUARANTEE YOUR HOT DOG IS

KOSHER AND THAT IS WITH A JOB STEWART 100% CERTIFIED HOT DOG BRIS.

MRS. AND MRS. BOMB AND SEEN THE,

WOULD YOU COME OUT PLEASE?

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) BEAUTIFUL.

I JUST WANT TO SAY... OH, HE'S ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL.

(LAUGHTER)

>> WE'RE VERY PROUD.

>> Jon: VERY PROUD.

>> IT'S A BIG DAY FOR US.

THANK YOU SO MUCH MR. DALEY.

>> Jon: WELL, IT'S... COME HERE, LET ME HAVE... WHO'S FULL OF NITRATES?

YOU ARE!

YOU'RE FULL OF NITRATES!

LET ME MAKE SURE I CAN GET HIM AND OPEN MY TOOL KIT HERE.

WE GOT... YEAH, THAT SHOULD DO IT.

(LAUGHTER) NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, I'VE BEEN DOING THIS A LONG TIME.

LET ME JUST FIGURE OUT HOW WE'RE GOING TO...

(SCREAMING) OH, MY GOD!

I'M SO SORRY!

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING!

OH, MY GOD!

I'M SO SORRY!

(SCREAMING).

>> Jon: HERE, PROP A BAND-AID ON.

THAT OH, MY GOSH... HERE, THERE YOU GO!

TAKE THE BABY!

I'M SO... OH, GOSH, THAT'S TERRIBLE.

HE'LL HEAL UP IN IN NO TIME.

PUT A LITTLE RELISH ON THAT AND EVERYTHING WILL BE DON.

MOSUL OF THE.

I WANT TO POINT OUT VERY QUICKLY, YOU'VE PROBABLY NEVER SEEN THIS GENTLEMAN WITH THE BEARD.

HIS NAME IS RICH BLUM COMMUNIST.

NG WITH US HISBLOOMQUIST.HE IS LEAVI WONDERFUL BRIDE TO BE YOUNG

KRISTIN SCHAAL, THEY'RE GETTING MARRIED.

WE'RE DELIGHTED FOR THEM BOTH.

RICH IS A BRILLIANT WRITER AND GOOD AND KIND MAN AND A TENACIOUS AND RESOLUTE LOVER.

(LAUGHTER) WE'RE GOING TO MISS THE HELL OUT OF HIM BUT WE ARE GOING TO MAKE

YOUR LOVELY BRIDE TO BE STILL WORK HERE AND COME BACK AND SEE US ALL THE TIME.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) I LOVE YOU, BROTHER, YOU'RE A GOOD MAN.

RICHIE I BLOOMQUIST, GIVE IT TO HIM.

(CHEERS AND

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