Good News! You're Not Paranoid - The Republican Response

  • Aired:  06/11/13
  •  | Views: 23,288

Despite being technically legal and probably useful, the NSA surveillance program unsettles many with its potential dangers. (2:53)

Captioning sponsored by

COMEDY CENTRAL

>> HELLO THERE.

WELCOME TO THE DAILY SHOW.

I'M JOHN OLIVER.

JON STEWART IS STILL NOT HERE.

HE IS CURRENTLY LIVING OUT A

LIVE-ACTION LORD OF THE RINGS

ROLE-PLAYING EXPERIENCE DEEP IN

THE NEW ZEALAND WINDERNESS WHERE

I BELIEVE HE'S SERVING IN THE

NAVY THERE.

HE'S HAVING FUN.

THE POINT IS HE'S HAVING FUN.

MY GUEST TONIGHT IS THE CREATOR

OF SOME OF MY FAVORITE SHOWS ON

TELEVISION INCLUDING THE THICK

OF IT.

ALAN PARTRIDGE.

ARMANDO IS HERE WITH US.

( APPLAUSE )

SO YESTERDAY WE DISCUSSED THE

NEWS THAT THE N.S.A. HAS BEEN

TRACKING OUR CALL RECORDS,

EMAILS, EVEN OUR PERSONALIZED

BIRTHDAY CAKES.

LOOK, COMPLAIN ALL YOU WANT

ABOUT THAT BUT IT'S HOW WE

CALBIN LADEN.

SURPRISE.

SURPRISE!

TONIGHT, WE CONTINUE OUR

COVERAGE OF THE N.S.A. SCANDAL

WITH OUR ONGOING SEGMENT "IT

MEANS THE N.S.A. CAN READ THE

TIME OFF YOUR [BLEEP] WRIST

WATCH.

".

>> YOU WON'T KNOW WHO TO TRUST.

EAH.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

YOWSER.

THE GOOD NEWS, "YOU'RE NOT

PARANOID" IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY

BLANKETS.

COWER UNDER THEM FOR THE

ILLUSION OF SAFETY.

BLANKETS.

SO FAR, WE'VE LEARNED THAT THE

N.S.A. PROGRAM IS TECHNICALLY

LEGAL, PROBABLY USEFUL, AND YET

HAS THE POTENTIAL TO DO GREAT

HARM.

THEY'RE LIKE BATH SALTS.

GOOD TO RELAX IN.

LESS GOOD TO SHOVE INTO YOUR

FACE.

THAT IS WHY IT HAS BEEN SO HARD

TO ARTICULATE WHAT IS UNSETTLING

ABOUT THIS STORY.

EVEN FOR OUR MOST SOPHISTICATED

ORATORS.

>> SO, FOR EXAMPLE, SOME

CONSERVATIVE SENATOR CALLS

TRICKSY AT THE HOT LICKS MASSAGE

PARLOR, ALL RIGHT?

GUESS WHO KNOWS IT.

TRICKSY HAS THE NUMBER.

THE SENATOR HAS A NUMBER.

THE GUY GOES LIKE THIS.

WHOA!

AND GIVES IT OUT TO SOME WEBSITE

THAT COULD HURT THE SENATOR.

>> WHAT?

BE HONEST WITH ME.

HAVE YOU BUILT A TIME MACHINE SO

YOU CAN GO TO BRUSSELS IN THE

1930s?

ACTUALLY THAT REMINDS OF AN IDEA

FOR A MOVIE "WHOREHOUSE TIME

MACHINE."

HE MET THE WOMAN OF HIS DREAMS.

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