Breaking Up Bad

  • Aired:  02/05/14
  •  | Views: 45,105

The Algerian Henry Kissinger gives up on diplomacy in Syria, and Al Qaeda splits with another insurgent group over its too-extreme brand of terrorism. (3:32)

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]>> Jon: WELCOME TO "THE DAILY

SHOW".

MY NAME IS JON STEWART.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]HEY, EVERYBODY.

YOU ARE HERE ON A FINE NIGHT.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]THE GUEST TONIGHT MR. GEORGE

CLOONEY.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]I'M GOING TO LET YOU ENJOY THAT

FOR A LITTLE BIT BECAUSE FIRSTWE'RE GOING TO TALK ABOUT SYRIA.

[ LAUGHTER ]THIS IS KIND OF THE SPINACH OF

WORLD NEWS.

[ LAUGHTER ]YOU GOTTA EAT IT BEFORE YOU GET

YOUR CLOONEY SUNDAE.

[ LAUGHTER ]HOW BAD HAVE THINGS GOTTEN IN

SYRIA?

MORE THAN TWO MILLION REFUGEESHAVE FLED THE COUNTRY.

HOMS STILL UNDER AERIALBOMBARDMENT AFTER MORE THAN AYEAR. CHILDREN ARE SUFFERING.

HISTORICAL SITES POUNDED INTORUBBLE BUT NOT TO WORRY PEOPLE,

THE WORLD IS FINALLY GETTINGTOGETHER TO -- NO, NO.

[ LAUGHTER ]NOT THAT EXAMPLE.

THERE YOU GO.

[ LAUGHTER ]COMING UP ON ROUND TWO OF THE

SYRIAN PEACE TALKS IN GENEVA.

WE'RE GOING TO HEAR A RECAP FROMTHE ALGERIAN U.N. SPECIAL ENVOY

TO SYRIA.

WHAT IS THE WORD ABOUT HOMS.

>> IN HOMS WE HAVEN'T BEEN ABLETO DO ANYTHING.

[ LAUGHTER ]>> Jon: OKAY, OKAY.

HEY, MAN, YOU KNOW WHAT?

FINE THAT'S JUST ONE CITY.

THIS IS THE U.N.

THIS IS THE UNITEDSTATES, THIS IS THE WEST AND THEEAST GETTING

TOGETHER.

WHAT ABOUT ALL THE PRISONERS.

THE KIDNAPPED PEOPLE, THEDISAPPEARED PEOPLE?

>> AND ABOUT PRISONERS,KIDNAPPED PEOPLE, DISAPPEARED

PEOPLE, AGAIN HAVEN'T BEEN ABLETO DO ANYTHING.

[ LAUGHTER ]>> Jon: SYRIA IS SO BROKEN

EVEN ALGERIAN HENRY KISSINGER ISLIKE (bleep) IT I'M OUT OF

IDEAS.

[LAUGHTER]HERE IS THE CLEAREST SIGN YET OF

HOW BAD THINGS HAVE GOTTEN INSYRIA.

>> AL QAEDA IS CUTTING TIES WITHONE GROUP FOR BEING TOO EXTREME.

>> AL QAEDA'S GENERAL COMMANDISSUED A STATEMENT DISTANCING

ITSELF FROM ISIL SAYING AL QAEDADOESN'T HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH

IT AND ISN'T RESPONSIBLE FORTHEIR ACTIONS.

>> Jon: DID YOU GET THAT?

AN AL QAEDA AFFILIATE IN SYRIAIS SO EXTREME AL QAEDA IS

LIKE --[LAUGHTER]

-- HOW BIG OF AN (bleep) DOYOU HAVE TO BE BEFORE AYMAN

AL-ZAWAHIRI, THE COMMANDER OF ALQAEDA SAYS I CAN'T WORK WITH

THESE GUYS.

THESE GUYS ARE MANIACS.

WHAT HAPPENED?

>> THEY WERE BEGINNING TOTHREATEN

AL-ZAWAHIRI'SAUTHORITY.

>> Jon: REALLY. THE VIOLENTINSURGENTS IN SYRIA AL QAEDACHOSE TO WORK WITH WENT ALLVIOLENT INSURGENT.

THAT'S THE BIGGEST PLOT TWISTSINCE THE END OF GRIZZLY MAN.

REALLY, THE GUY WHO WANDEREDINTO THE WILDERNESS TO LIVE WITH

BEARS GOT EATEN BY A BEAR. WHOSAW THAT COMING?

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