Faith/Off

  • Aired:  09/26/13
  •  | Views: 71,388

God's infallible emissary on Earth differs with God's incredibly fallible emissaries on Earth when it comes to scriptural interpretation. (4:57)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.

GOD, YAWEH, ADUNAI.

WHATEVER YOU CALL THESUPREME BEING I THINK

EVERYONE CAN AGREE IT'S A DUDEWITH A SWEET WHITE BEARD

THAT LIVES IN THE CLOUDS.

HOW CAN THAT BE WRONG?

AND THAT DUDE HAS REALLYONLY TWO WAYS OF GETTING HIS

MESSAGE DIRECTLY TO THEPEOPLE.

THE POPE, GOD'S INFALLIBLEEMISSARY ON EARTH, GOD'S

INCREDIBLY FALLIBLE EMISSARIESON EARTH, THE REPUBLICANS.

>> AND I THINK EVEN WHENLIFE BEGINS IN THAT HORRIBLE

SITUATION OF RAPE, THAT ITIS SOMETHING THAT GOD

INTENDED TO HAPPEN.

>> Jon: REALLY?

I THINK EVEN IN THATSITUATION GOD'S LIKE WHOA,

WHOA, WAIT A SECOND.

I'LL TAKE CREDIT FOR SUPER BOWLWINS AND LATIN GRAMMIES BUT

I'M GOING TO GO ALLENSMITHY ON THE RAPE BABY

THING. NOW TRADITIONALLYTHESE TWO HOLY CONDUITS HAVE

BEEN ON THE SAME PAGE.

BUT WITH THE ASCENSION OFTHIS NEW INCREDIBLY HUMBLE

WASHING THE POOR'S FEET,SLEEP ON A CONVERTIBLE SOFA,

DO YOU NEED A RIDE TO THEAIRPORT POPE, THINGS MIGHT

BE CHANGING.

>> IN A BLUNT INTERVIEW INTHE JESUIT MAGAZINE

AMERICA POPE FRANCIS SAYSTHE CHURCH CANNOT BE

OBSESSED WITH THE ISSUESTHAT DIVIDE IT.

WE CANNOT INSIST ONLY ONISSUES RELATED TO ABORTION,

GAY MARRIAGE AND THE USE OFCONTRACEPTIVE METHODS.

>> Jon: OH, ABORTION, GAYMARRIAGE AND CONTRACEPTION.

WHAT COULD HE BE REFERRINGTO.

>> REPUBLICANS ARE CALLINGTHE PRESIDENT'S NEW RULES ON

CONTRACEPTION A WAR ONRELIGIOUS LIBERTY.

>> THE AMENDMENT THAT MAYBEGOT THE MOST ATTENTION WOULD

LET SAME SEX COUPLESSPONSOR THEIR PARTNERS.

REPUBLICANS SAY IT COULDKILL THE BILL.

>> THE GOVERNMENT COULDSHOULD DOWN ON THE ISSUE OF

ABORTION.

>> THE ISSUE OF ABORTION.

>> ABORTION.

>> ABORTION.

>> A BIRTH CONTROL ISSUE.

>> CONTRACEPTIVES.

>> I WOULD RIGHT NOW BEOPPOSED TO GAY MARRIAGE.

>> MARRIAGE IS BETWEEN ONE MANAND ONE WOMAN.

>> THE FREEDOM TO BELIEVE INTRADITIONAL MARRIAGE, THAT

WAS TAUGHT IN THE BIBLE.

>> Jon: POLYGAMY-- YOU KNOW,FORGET IT, BY THE WAY, A

LESS HUMBLE POPE WOULDPROBABLY MAKE HIMSELF THE

COVER OF EVERY MONTH'S ISSUEOF, YOU KNOW, THAT MAGAZINE.

(LAUGHTER)POPRAH.

BUT BACK TO MY MAIN POINT.

HERE'S POPE FRANCIS TALKINGABOUT POOR PEOPLE.

>>> THE MEASURE OF THEGREATNESS OF THE SOCIETY IS

FOUND IN THE WAY IT TREATSTHOSE MOST IN NEED.

THOSE WHO HAVE NOTHING APARTFROM THEIR POVERTY.

>> Jon: WOW.

I GUESS THAT IS ONE MEASUREOF A GREAT SOCIETY.

I MEAN YOU COULD ALSO GO BYHOW MUCH IT CAN BENCH.

OR THE NUMBER OF TWITTERFOLLOWERS.

BUT YOU KNOW, IT'S A GOODONE.

SO REPUBLICANS, THE TOPIC ISTHE POOR.

SURVEY SAYS -->> THE HOUSE VOTED TO SLASH

THE FOOD STAMP PROGRAM BYNEARLY $40 BILLION OVER THE

NEXT TEN YEARS.

>> MY MOTIVATION IS ONLYBEEN TO INTRODUCE THE

BLESSING OF WORK TOABLE-BODIED PEOPLE.

>> THERE'S BEEN A LOT OFTALK ABOUT SCRIPTURE.

AND A LOT OF TALK ABOUTGOD'S PLAN.

>> GOD CREATED ADAM PLACEDHIM IN THE GARDEN TO WORK

IT.

WORK IS NOT A PENALTY.

WORK IS A BLESSING.

>> Jon: YOU KNOW THAT'S SOTRUE.

IT REMINDED ME OF THE SERMONON THE MOUNT.

CONSIDER THE LILLIES.

THEY TOIL NOT SO [BLEEP]THEM LAZY LILLIES.

WITH THEIR STAMMENSAND PISTELS, THOSE ARE

ONLY THE ONLY TWO PARTS IREMEMBER ON FLOWERS BUT

COASTING ON GOVERNMENTISSUE SUN AND RAIN.

FOR SOME REASON GOD HASDECIDED TO GIVE ONE MESSAGE

TO THE POPE, AND AN ENTIRELYDIFFERENT MESSAGE TO THE

WAYS HE WORKS IS SOMYSTERIOUS.

NOW I GUESS YOU COULD SAYBOY, YOU KNOW, YOUR IDEOLOGY

IS RIGID AND OUTDATED WHENTHE HEAD OF THE ORGANIZATION

THAT JUST GOT AROUND TOAPOLOGIZING TO GALILEO

SHOWS MORE FLEXIBILITYTHAN YOU BUT LOOK, YOU ARE

BOTH GOD'S MESSENGERS WHO ISTO SAY ONE OF YOU IS RIGHT

AND ONE OF YOU IS WRONG.

DIFFERENT INTERPRETATIONS OFGOD'S WILL, AS LONG AS THERE

IS NO FUNDAMENTAL SCHISMBETWEEN THIS POPE AND

REPUBLICANS.

>> AN OFF-THE-CUFF COMMENTWHILE VISITING ONE OF

ITALY'S POOREST AREAS POPEFRANCIS DENOUNCED WHAT HE

CALLED IDOLATRY OF MONEY ANDBIG BUSINESS.

>> OH NO, NOW THE [BLEEP] ISON.

YOU BETTER WATCH IT!

OR WE'RE GOING TO END UPINVADING THE VATICAN.

>> WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

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