Arrest Development - Caucasian Terrorists

  • Aired:  04/22/13
  •  | Views: 53,343

Aasif Mandvi explains how the Boston Marathon bombers' ethnic background disrupts the story Americans have long been told about who the bad guys are and what they look like. (3:04)

TOO MUCH.

FOR ALL THE CONJECTURE THERE ARE

NOW A FEW THINGS WE DO KNOW FOR

SURE ABOUT TERROR SUSPECTS.

FOR MORE WE'RE JOINED BY AASIF

MANDVI LIVE IN BOSTON.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR JOINING

US.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

>> THANK YOU, JON.

Jon: YOU'VE BEEN UP IN

BOSTON.

YOU HAVE BEEN FOLLOWING THIS

STORY FROM THE VERY BEGINNING.

WHAT CAN YOU TELL US ABOUT THE

SUSPECT SO FAR.

>> I CAN TELL YOU THIS, JON.

WHEN THEY FIRST RELEASED THOSE

PHOTOS, MUSLIMS ALL OVER AMERICA

SAID, "THANK GOD THEY ARE NOT

MUSLIM."

>> Jon: RIGHT.

BUT THEN ON... ON FRIDAY WE

FOUND OUT THEY WERE MUSLIMS.

>> YEAH BUT NOT MUSLIM-MUSLIM.

Jon: YOU MEAN BECAUSE THEY'RE

WHITE.

>> NOT JUST WHITE.

THE WHITEST OF WHITE.

I MEAN, THEY WERE LITERALLY FROM

CAULK ASIA.

>> Jon: OBVIOUSLY IN PEOPLE'S

EYES, IT CAN STILL LINK ISLAM TO

TERRORISM.

WHY DOES IT MAKE A DIFFERENCE

THAT THEY'RE WHITE?

>> IT MEANS NO ONE WILL BE

YELLING AT ME ON THE STREET FOR

THE NEXT MONTH.

OKAY.

I MEAN, THEY'LL STILL SAY, HEY,

KUMAR, CAN I GET YOUR AUTOGRAPH?

I'M OKAY WITH THAT.

NOW THE BIGOTS HAVE TO GET

CREATIVE.

GOOD LUCK COMING UP FOR SLURS

WITH CHECHENS.

GO BACK WHERE YOU CAME FROM,

USHANKA-HEAD.

>> Jon: IS THAT A REAL THING OR

A SLUR YOU MADE UP.

>> IT'S THEIR DISTINCTIVE FUR

HAT, JON.

I HAD TO LOOK IT UP ON

WIKIPEDIA.

THAT'S HOW HARD IT IS GOING TO

BE.

>> Jon: I'M NOT SURE THAT COMING

UP WITH NO ETHNIC STEREOTYPES IS

REALLY THE MOST PRODUCTIVE USE

OF OUR TIME RIGHT NOW.

>> HAVE YOU GOT A BETTER IDEA,

JON?

I CAN'T MAKE HEADS OR TAILS OF

THIS MESS.

THE MORE WE KNOW ABOUT THESE

GUYS THE HARDER IT IS TO GET A

HANDLE ON IT.

>> Jon: CHECHENS.

CHECHNYA MIGHT AS WELL BE A

SUBURB OF NARNIA.

FOR 12 YEARS AMERICANS HAVE BEEN

TOLD A NICE LITTLE STORY ABOUT

WHO THE BAD GUYS ARE AND WHAT

THEY LOOK LIKE.

AND THEN ALONG COME THESE TWO.

THE MUSLIM.

THEY'RE WHITE.

THEY'RE IMMIGRANTS BUT THEY'RE

AMERICANS.

THEY'RE ATHLETES.

DZHOKHAR IS A MONSTER YET KIND

OF A HOTTIE.

>> Jon: I GET THAT.

THEY'RE FROM THE SUBURBS YET

THEY LIKE THE HIP HOP.

>> I'M PRETTY SURE THAT ONE IS

DIFFICULT.

BUT THE POINT IS THERE'S TOO

MUCH GOING ON WITH THESE GUYS.

EVEN THE GUYS' NAMES.

DZHOKHAR TSARNAEV.

IT'S LIKE HE MANAGED TO SQUEEZE

EVERY LETTER OF THE AL A BET IN

THERE.

YOU CAN ANAGRAM TO SPELL

ANYTHING FROM OVERT HAZARD SHANK

TO ZACK EFRON SUCKS TO JELLO

PUDDING POPS.

CAN'T GET MORE AMERICAN THAN

THAT.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ).

>> Jon: YELLOW PUDDING POPS?

THE LAST FEW, AASIF, I'M PRETTY

SURE AT LEAST TWO OF THOSE WERE

NOT ACTUALLY ANAGRAMS.

>> I DO NOT KNOW HOW ANAGRAMS

WORK, JON.

>> Jon: AASIF MANDVI, EVERYBODY.

WE'LL BE RIGHT B

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