Transformer - Campaign-Based Economy

  • Aired:  09/12/11
  •  | Views: 78,539

Americans must embrace an America whose greatest resource is campaign-driven drivel. (4:28)

SO THE PRESIDENT WAS ON A

ROLL.

OF COURSE WE'VE BECOME

ACCUSTOMED TO OBAMA

ACQUIESCING TO REPUBLICAN

LEGISLATIVE INTRANSYENTS.

WHAT'S HIS STRATEGY.

>> YOU SHOULD PASS THIS JOBS

PLAN RIGHT AWAY.

PASS THIS JOBS BILL AND WE CAN

PUT PEOPLE TO WORK REBUILDING

AMERICA.

PASS THIS BILL.

PASS THIS JOBS BILL.

PASS THIS BILL RIGHT AWAY.

PASS THIS JOBS BILL.

PASS THIS BILL.

PASS THIS BILL RIGHT AWAY.

>> Jon: YOU CAN REPEAT IT ALL

YOU WANT.

IT'S NOT REALLY....

>> PASS THIS JOBS BILL.

>> Jon: IN THIS POLITICAL

CLIMATE....

>> PASS THIS JOBS BILL.

>> Jon: TOUCHE.

THAT WAS THURSDAY NIGHT.

THE NEXT DAY, OBAMA HEADS OUT

TO SELL THE BILL WITH A HUGE

RALLY-- AND I THOUGHT THIS WAS

A NICE TOUCH-- ERIC CANTOR'S

HOME DISTRICT.

THIS MORNING HE DOES THE WHOLE

ROSE GARDEN CEREMONY WITH A

HUNDRED OF HIS CLOSEST PROPS.

>> STAND ING WITH ME THIS

MORNING ARE MEN AND WOMEN WHO

WILL BE HELPED BY THE AMERICAN

JOBS ACT.

I'M STANDING WITH TEACHERS.

I'M STANDING HERE WITH

VETERANS, WITH COPS AND

FIREFIGHTERS, SMALL BUSINESS

OWNERS, CONSTRUCTION WORKERS.

>> Jon: WOW.

IT'S LIKE HE'S WITH THE

VILLAGE PEOPLE.

IT'S LIKE HE IS WITH THE

VILLAGE PEOPLE OF A DOUBLE-DIP

RECESSION.

WE HAVE TO LIVE AT THE Y-M-C-A.

LOOK, I'VE GOT TO SAY...

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

LOOK AT THE FIRE.

LOOK AT THE FIRE IN OBAMA'S

BELLY.

LOOK AT IT.

>> NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR

PEOPLE IN WASHINGTON TO BE

WORRYING ABOUT THEIR JOBS.

IT'S TIME FOR THEM TO BE

WORRYING ABOUT YOUR JOBS.

NOW IS THE TIME TO PUT

AMERICANS BACK TO WORK.

NOW IS THE TIME TO ACT.

>> Jon: I REMEMBER THAT GUY.

IT'S SO REFRESHING, LADIES AND

GENTLEMEN.

CAMPAIGN OBAMA IS BACK.

SO MUCH COOLER THAN GOVERNING

OBAMA.

I'D ALMOST FORGOTTEN CAMPAIGN

OBAMA EXISTED AFTER

TWO-AND-A-HALF YEARS OF

WATCHING THIS OTHER GUY.

>> WHAT YOU SAW... AND AGAIN,

YOU KNOW, YOU'LL SEE THIS FROM

THE DESCRIPTION OF... OF... OF

THE DEAL.

ESSENTIALLY WHAT THEY HAD

AGREED TO GIVE ON IS... IS

TO... TO GET BACK TO... UH, A

BASELINE.

THIS STARTS GETTING TECHNICAL.

BUT THERE WERE ABOUT 800

BILLION DOLLARS IN REVENUE

THAT WOULD BE AVAILABLE.

WHAT WE SAID WAS WHEN YOU HAVE

A RATIO OF $4 IN CUTS FOR

EVERYONE DOLLAR OF REVENUE

THAT'S PRETTY HARD TO STOMACH.

>> Jon: THAT'S WHY I FOLDED ON

THE DEFICIT REDUCTION DEAL.

ANYWAY, SEE THE OTHER GUY

WOULD HAVE NEVER DONE THAT.

BECOMING CAMPAIGN OBAMA HAS

REINVIGORATED OBAMA.

RAISING MONEY.

ROLLING UP HIS SLEEVES.

YOUR OPPONENTS ARE RAISING

MONEY ON THEIR OWN AND ROLLING

UP THEIR SLEEVES?

WAIT.

I THINK I MAY HAVE AN IDEA

THAT MAY SOLVE ALL OF OUR

PROBLEMS.

FOREVER.

NO, IT'S NOT HELP FOR PANDAS.

LET US AS A NATION GIVE UP THE

PIPE DREAM ONCE AND FOR ALL

THAT AN INSPIRATIONAL LEADER

CAN CHALLENGE THE STATUS QUO,

REMAKE WASHINGTON AND GOVERN

SUCCESSFULLY.

BUT WE CAN PLAY TO OUR

STRENGTHS AND EMBRACE AN

AMERICA WHOSE GREATEST

RESOURCE IS CAMPAIGN-DRIVEN

DRIBBLE.

WE'RE NUMBER ONE IN ASPIRING

POLITICAL LEADERS TELLING US

HOW GREAT WE ARE.

LET'S USE THAT AND CONVERT

AMERICA TO A CAMPAIGN-BASED

ECONOMY.

THE COMMERCIALS, THE BUS TOURS,

THE FUND RAISING.

THINK OF HOW MANY TEACHERS,

FIRST RESPONDERS AND

CONSTRUCTION WORKERS WE COULD

HIRE IF WE NEED THEM TO STAND

BEHIND POLITICIANS EIGHT HOURS

A DAY, 365 DAYS A YEAR.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

AND PUMP MORE MONEY IN A LOCAL

ECONOMY THAN A POLITICAL

CONVENTION.

REPUBLICANS AND DEMOCRATS

COULD HOLD ONE MONTHLY IN

EVERY STATE INJECTING BILLIONS

INTO THE BALLOON DROP STRAW

HAT ESCORT AND DEAD ESCORT

REMOVAL INDUSTRIES.

CAN WE SAVE THIS COUNTRY BY

RELYING ON OUR GREATEST

NATURAL RESOURCE: HAND-CRANKED

CORPORATELY FINANCED BULL

(BEEP) MACHINES?

I SAY YES, WE CAN!

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