One Crazy Summary - Correspondents' Send-Off

  • Aired:  08/15/13
  •  | Views: 36,405

Samantha Bee spotlights a once-proud American institution brought to its knees by gross mismanagement, and Wyatt Cenac wishes he could have saved the other correspondents. (5:35)

>> WELCOME BACK.

THIS SUMMER HAS BEEN SO MUCH

FUN.

COY NOT HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT

THE OTHER CORRESPONDENTS.

THEY HAVE BEEN INCREDIBLY

SUPPORTIVE THE WHOLE TIME.

LET'S GO OUT TO THEM NOW ONE

LAST TIME.

STARTING WITH SALMON THAT

BEE IN DETROIT, SAM, ANY

UPDATES?

I KNOW THINGS ARE PRETTY

GRIM OVER THERE.

>> OH, JOHN T IS WORSE THAN

YOU COULD POSSIBLY IMAGINE.

>> RIGHT.

>> A ONCE PROUD AMERICAN

INSTITUTION BROUGHT TO ITS

KNEES BY GROSS MISMANAGEMENT

AND INCOMPETENT LEADERSHIP.

YOU KNOW, YOU WONDER IF IT

WILL EVER AGAIN BE THE ICON

IT WAS ONCE.

>> BUT SAM, ON THE OTHER

HAND, DETROIT IS RESILIENT,

WILL WILL BOUNCE BACK,

SHORTLY OPINIONS DETROIT, NO,

I'M TALKING ABOUT THE DAILY

SHOW.

>> COME ON.

>> IT TOOK DECADES TO BRING

DETROIT TO ITS KNEES BUT YOU

DESTROYED THE DAILY SHOW IN

LIKE THREE MONTHS.

>> WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.

GO A LITTLE EASY.

>> YOU'RE FASTER THAN EBOLA.

WHAT?

>> I WOULD SAY THAT I'M

SPEAKING TRUTH TO POWER BUT

YOU HAVE TO POWER AND

WHATEVER POWER YOU THOUGHT

YOU HAD ENDS IN ABOUT SIX

MINUTES WHICH IS LESS TIME

THAN IT TAKES TO MAKE A HOT

POCKET, BUT ENOUGH TIME I'M

SURE FOR YOU TO [BLEEP] THE

SHOW EVEN FURTHER UNTIL IT

BEGS TO BE PUT OUT OF ITS

MISSERY.

>> THANK YOU, SAMANTHA.

LET'S GO TO JESSICA WILLIAMS,

JESS, WHERE EXACTLY ARE YOU.

>> I'M IN FRONT OF PAULA

DEEN'S HOUSE, JOHN.

>> THAT IS ENCOURAGING.

ANY DOVMENTS ON THAT STORY?

>> OH, NO, I'M ACTUALLY JUST

HERE LOOKING FOR A JOB.

>> WHAT?

>> BECAUSE LET ME BE CLEAR,

I WOULD MUCH RATHER WORK FOR

AN OLD LADY WHO ADMITTED TO

THROWING THE "N" WORD AROUND

THAN SPEND SIX MORE MINUTES

WORKING FOR YOU.

>> WOW, THAT SEEMS A LITTLE

EXTREME, JESS.

>> OH MY GOSH, DOES IT,

JOHN.

>> A LITTLE.

>> WELL, THEN, LET ME JUST

SAY ONE MORE THING.

>> SURE GO AHEAD.

>> [BLEEP] YOU!

>> OKAY, OKAY, OKAY, THERE

IS NOT EXACTLY HOW I

ENVISAGED MY FINAL SHOW

GOING, TO BE HONEST AM BUT

APPARENTLY WE ACTUALLY HAVE

ANOTHER REPORTER WHO IS LIVE

AT THE MOSCOW AIRPORT, MAYBE

SNOWDEN IS ON THE MOVE.

WHO'S THERE, WHAT?

--

>> JOHN

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> WYATT, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN

DOING SINCE YOU LEFT THE

SHOW?

>> I'VE BEEN GREAT.

I FEEL LIKE A GUY WHO HAD A

PARTICULAR FOR THE TITANIC

BUT GOT ON BOARD AND SAID

YOU KNOW WHAT, THIS DOESN'T

FEEL RIGHT, I'M GOING TO

TAKE A PLANE.

>> THAT DOESN'T WORK.

THAT DOESN'T WORK, THAT

ANALOGY, THERE WEREN'T

PLANES IN 1912.

>> I DON'T GIVE A [BLEEP]

ABOUT THAT, JOHN, IT'S WHY I

LEFT.

THE POINT IS I AVOIDED

CRASHING INTO THE ICEBERG

THAT WOULD HAVE LEFT ME

FLOATING IN THIS [BLEEP]

SHOW.

BUT NOW FOOD TASTES BETTER,

THE SUN IS BRIGHTER.

I JUST WISH COY HAVE SAVED

THE OTHERS, THAT'S WHAT

REALLY --

>> WHAT, WYATT, THAT'S WHY

YOU'RE FILING THIS REPORT TO

TELL ME THAT I RUINED THIS

SHOW.

>> JOHN, I'M HERE BECAUSE

I'M YOUR FRIEND.

>> OH, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

>> YOU KNOW WHEN A

SKATEBOARDER TRIES TO DO A

TRICK OVER A WALL AND HE

CAN'T HANDLE IT.

>> YEAH.

>> HE LANDS ON HIS BALLS.

AND HE'S JUST LYING THERE

WITH HIS BALLS HURTING.

>> YEAH, I GET T I GET.

>> I'M THE FRIEND WHO COMES

OVER TO SEE IF HE'S OKAY AND

I ALSO MAKE SURE I GET THE

WHOLE THING ON VIDEO.

>> OKAY, WELL-- THAT'S VERY

GENEROUS OF YOU WYATT, I

APPRECIATE IT I HAVE GOT TO

GO TO JASON JONES NOW, HE IS

LIVE IN LONDON, OH, HE'S NOT,

HE'S NOT, MAYBE HE JUST

CAN'T EVEN BE BOTHERED TO BE

THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE.

WHOA.

>> ENOUGH OF THAT [BLEEP].

>>

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> NO WAY, NO WAY!

NO WAY!

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

THAT'S GREAT OKAY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

>>.

>> ALL RIGHT, ENOUGH, ENOUGH

OF WHAT IS GOING ON HERE.

LEAVE JOHN OLIVER A LOCHBLT

HE'S DOING A HECK OF A JOB,

I'M PROUD OF YOU.

>> ROB, THANK YOU SO MUCH.

YOU HAVE BEEN WATCHING THE

SHOW THIS SUMMER?

>> NO.

>> NOT REALLY MY THING.

I'M MORE OF A WIPEOUT KIND

OF GUY.

NOW THAT'S A SHOW.

>> WIPEOUT, YOU MEAN THE

SHOW WHERE PEOPLE RUB ACROSS

INFLATABLE --

>> SPOILER ALERT.

COME ON!

I DIDN'T GET TO WATCH LAST

WEEK'S EPISODE.

IT'S ON MY TiVO THOUGH.

>> OKAY, SORRY.

SO WHY ARE YOU IN LONDON,

EXACTLY?

>> WELL, BASICALLY, JUST TO

GAUGE THE MOOD ON THE

STREET.

TO SEE WHAT THE PEOPLE IN

YOUR HOMELAND THINK.

I'VE GOT TO BE HONEST, THEY

HATE YOU.

>> I'M HEARING A LOT OF

THINGS LIKE THIS, LIKE HE'S

AN EMBARRASSMENT, HE IS AND

TOSS ANOTHER SHRIMP ON THE

BARBY.

>> THAT IS AUSTRALIAN FOR A

START.

>> I THINK I KNOW MY

EUROPEAN COUNTRIES, JOHN.

>> THAT'S NOT EVEN YOURS.

>> 9 POINT IS THIS, THIS

COUNTRY IS IN A TAILSPIN.

>> NO, IT'S NOT.

>> TAILSPIN OF SHAME.

>> SI HAVE TALKED TO SEVERAL

PEOPLE ON THE STREETS AND

HERE IS WHAT THEY ARE

CALLING YOU AND I WROTE IT

DOWN SO BEAR WITH ME.

>> OKAY.

>> THE UNION JACK-- ASS.

>> BUCKINGHAM FALL --

>> THEY DIDN'T A THAT.

>> THE [BLEEP] THAT RUINED

THE DAILY SHOW.

>> WHOA, YOU CANNOT SAY THAT

WORD.

>> APPARENTLY HERE YOU CAN.

PEOPLE SAY IT TO ME LIKE SIX,

SEVEN TIMES A DAY.

BUT IF YOU ASK ME YOU'VE

BEEN DOING AN INCREDIBLE JOB

AS A HOST.

>> THAT MEANS ABSOLUTELY

NOTHING COMING FROM YOU.

YOU JUST TOLD ME YOU HAVEN'T

WATCHED IT ALL SUMMER.

>> GEE, LEARN TO TAKE A

COMPLIMENT, JOHN, KEEP UP

ITS GOOD WORK.

I'M PROUD OF YOU.

>> THIS IS MY LAST SHOW

HOSTING.

>> OOH, THAT SUCTION.

HEY, IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR

WORK YOU SHOULD GET ON

WIPEOUT.

NOW THAT'S A SHOW.

PLUS EVERYONE WOULD LOVE TO

SEE YOU GET SMASHED IN YOUR

STUPID BRITISH FACE.

>> NO, THEY WOULDN'T.

>> OH, LOOK AT ME --

>> ROB, THANK YOU.

Loading...