The Punching of Abubakar Shekau

  • Aired:  05/12/14
  •  | Views: 106,284

A militant terrorist group in Nigeria kidnaps hundreds of schoolgirls, drawing the disapproval of even Al Qaeda. (3:06)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Jon: HEY, EVERYBODY,

WELCOME TO THE DAILY SHOW,MY NAME IS JON STEWART.

GOOD ONE TONIGHT, MY GUESTDR. MARTIN BLASER HERE

TO TELL US WHY WE ARE ALLGOING TO DIE OF FORMERLY

TREATABLE DISEASES.

(LAUGHTER)SPEAKING OF MEDIEVAL

SCOURGES THAT SHOULD BEERADICATED, HORRIBLE GOINGS-ON

IN NIGERIA.

>> NEARLY THREE WEEKS AGO INNORTHERN NIGERIA HIGH SCHOOL

GIRLS, POSSIBLY MORE THAN200 OF THEM, WERE KIDNAPPED

FROM THEIR SCHOOL IN AREMOTE VILLAGE.

>> Jon: AH! WHAT KIND OF EVILSATANIC INDIVIDUAL WOULD

STOOP TO SUCH INHUMANDEPTHS.

>> THE ATTACKERS AREBELIEVED TO BE MEMBERS OF

BOKO HARAM, A MILITANT ALQAEDA INSPIRED GROUP THAT

WANTS ITS OWN ISLAMIC STATEIN NORTHERN NIGERIA.

>> Jon: OH RIGHT. SUPERRELIGIOUS SATANIC PEOPLE.

FOR, DOES IT NOT SAY INTHE QURAN, KIDNAP THE

INNOCENT GIRLS FOR THEY ARESTUDYING-- OH IT DOESN'T SAY

THAT, RIGHT, THAT'S RIGHT.

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, [BLEEP] ALQAEDA.

>> "THE NEW YORK TIMES"TODAY READ ABDUCTION OF

GIRLS AN ACT NOT EVEN AL QAEDACAN CONDONE.

>> Jon: WOW.

YOU KNOW THERE'S NOT A LOTOF TIMES YOU'RE GOING TO GET A

JEWISH GUY TO GO I AGREEWITH AL QAEDA.

BUT WOW. SO THENIGERIAN GROUP BOKO HARAM

JUST OVERTON WINDOW-ED ALQAEDA, THE

GROUP THAT NEVER SAWSOMETHING FULL OF CIVILIANS

IT DIDN'T WANT TO BLOW UP ISSAYING, TAKE IT DOWN A NOTCH.

WHO IS THE NIGERIAN MANIACWHO HAS CAUSED AL QAEDA TO

COMPLAIN THAT HE ISBESMIRCHING THEIR

GOOD NAME?

>> NIGERIA-- (LAUGHTER)

>> NIGERIA-- (LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: I THINK I'VE JUSTFIGURED OUT WHAT I WANT

IRONMAN 4 TO BE ABOUT.

(LAUGHTER)(APPLAUSE)

HOLY CRAP.

BY THE WAY, THAT THING THATSHEKAU IS WAVING IS NOT

AS YOU WOULD ASSUME DRUGPARAPHERNALIA, IT IS CALLED

A MISWAK, A TOOTH-CLEANING TWIGFAVORED BY THE PROPHET MOHAMMED

AND STILL POPULAR IN MANY PARTSOF THE MUSLIM WORLD.

SHEKAU IS USING ONE BECAUSEEVEN IF YOU ARE A SOULLESS,

FOREST DWELLING LUNATIC, YOUSHOULDN'T NEGLECT YOUR GUMS.

(LAUGHTER)HIS PARENTS TAUGHT HIM GOOD

ORAL HYGIENE AND THENSTOPPED TEACHING HIM THINGS.

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