That Custom-Tailored Obama Scandal You Ordered Is Finally Here

  • Aired:  09/15/11
  •  | Views: 321,744

Solyndra's failure doesn't discredit the entire idea of a green energy economy, but some might take it as a sign of the Obama administration's incompetence. (8:10)

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

>> Barry: WELCOME TO THE

DAILY SHOW.

MY NAME IS JON STEWART.

OUR GUEST TONIGHT WILL BE

CAROLINE KENNEDY, NO RELATION.

AND BUT LET'S BEGIN TONIGHT WITH

BARACK OBAMA.

( LAUGHTER )

YOU KNOW HOW YOU HATE BARACK

OBAMA?

NOT DISAPPOINTED.

NOT WISH HE HANDLED CERTAIN

ISSUES IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER,

BUT HATE HIM, JUST REALLY WANT

TO NAIL HIM.

HE HAD A GOOD RUN ON THE BIRTH

CERTIFICATE THING, BUT TURNS OUT

HE HAD ONE.

WORKED REAL HARD AT THE SECRET

MUSLIM, AND THEN HE WENT OUT AND

KILLED OSAMA BIN LADEN.

AKONG REVEREND WRIGHT, BILL

AYERS, TONIES AREICO, HIGH NEW

JERSEY TWO OR THREE WARS AND GUY

IS STILL HANGING AROUND 40%

APPROVAL.

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE LOST

HOPE, I SAY MERRY CHRISTMAS.

AND WELCOME TO OUR NEW SEGMENT--

THE CUSTOM-TAILORED OBAMA

SCANDAL YOU ORDERED IS FINALLY

HERE.

I'LL LET THE NEWS MEDIA FILL YOU

IN.

>> THE WIDENING SCANDAL

INVOLVING A COMPANY HIGHLY

TOUTED BY THE WHITE HOUSE.

>> THE CENTERPIECE OF THE

PRESIDENT OBAMA'S PITCH TO THE

AMERICAN PEOPLE, THE CREATION OF

MORE GREEN JOBS.

>> THE COMPANY THAT HAS NOW

DECLARED BANKRUPTCY, LAID OFF

ALL 1100 OF ITS WORKERS AND WAS

RAIDED BY THE F.B.I. LAST WEEK.

>> Jon: COMPANIES COME AND

GO ALL THE TIME.

IT'S NOT LIKE THE AMERICAN

PEOPLE LONED THIS COMPANY HALF A

BILLION DOLLARS AND THE COMPANY

NAME SOUNDS LIKE ONE OF THOSE

WEIRD PLANETS CAPTAIN KIRK FOUND

HIMSELF ON, YOU KNOW THE ONES

THAT WERE JUST LIKE EARTH ONLY

ALL THE WOMEN WEAR ORANGE.

>> THE CALIFORNIA SOLAR PANEL

COMPANY SOLYNDRA, WHICH RECEIVED

A MAJOR LONE FROM THE FEDERAL

GOVERNMENT ONLY TO COLLAPSE.

>> SOLYNDRA RECEIVED $535

BILLION IN HELENE GUARANTEES TO

EXPAND PRODUCTION OF CUTTING

EDGE SOLAR PANELS.

>> EARTH TO ENTERPRIZE.

HOW MANY MONEY DID WE GIVE

THOSE...

IDIOTS?

SPOCK, WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN ME?

TERRIBLE, CAPTAIN KIRK.

SORRY.

ALL RIGHT, FINE, SO A SOLAR

PANEL COMPANY THAT WE GAVE $500

MILLION TO COLLAPSED.

$500 MILLION IS ONLY 1.3% OF THE

MONEY GIVEN OUT BY THE

GOVERNMENT'S GREEN ENERGY

PROGRAM.

MOST OF THE OTHER COMPANIES THAT

BENEFITED FROM THAT MONEY, SOLE

AWIND, NUCLEAR, THEY'RE DOING

FINE.

IN TRUTH THANK YOU SCANDAL WOULD

ONLY BE EXPLOITABLE IF THE

PRESIDENT HAD MADE THIS ONE

PARTICULAR COMPANY THE POSTAR

CHILD FOR THE PROGRAM IF HE HAD

TOURED THE SOLYNDRA FACILITIES

OR MET WITH THE C.E.O. OR

PRAISED ITS CUTTING EDGE

INGENUITY IN A SPEECH THAT IN

RETROSPECT WILL SEEM

ILL-ADVISED.

>> THE TRUE ENGINE OF ECONOMIC

GROWTH WILL ALWAYS BE COMPANIES

LIKE SOLYNDRA.

IT'S HERE THAT COMPANIES LIKE

SOLYNDRA ARE A LEADING THE WAY

TOWARD A BRIGHTER AND MORE

PROSPEROUS FUTURE.

>> Jon: GENERATIONS FROM

NOW, WHEN INTELLIGENT APES RULE

OVER THIS LAND, ONLY TWO

ARTIFACTS OF OUR CIVILIZATION

WILL WEMAIN.

HALF THE STATUE OF LIBERTY AND

THIS BEAUTIFUL FACTORY, WHICH

WILL STILL BE HIM ALONG AND PIG

AS MEMBERSHIP AS 1100 APES.

( LAUGHTER )

SO DOES FAILURE OF ONE COMPANY

DISCREDIT THE ENTIRE IDEA OF A

GREEN ENERGY ECONOMY?

OF COURSE NOT.

BUT IF IN, LET'S SAY, 1936, YOU

SPOKE ABOUT THE GROWING

IMPORTANCE OF AIR TRAVEL IN

FRONT OF, I DON'T KNOW, THE

HIND'D HINDENBURG, YOU'D BE

RIGHT ABOUT THE FUTURE OF AIR

TRAVEL.

BUT YOU'D STILL BE ON ( BLEEP )

FIRE.

( LAUGHTER )

OH, THE STUPIDITY!

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

SO THE ADMINISTRATION, MAYBE

THEIR HEARTS ARE IN THE RIGHT

PLACE AND THEY JUST BET ON THE

WRONG HORSE.

IT'S NOT LIKE THERE'S ANY

DAMNING EVIDENCE THEY KNEW IN

ADVANCE THAT THE HORSE WAS A

DONKEY.

>> HOUSE REPUBLICAN

INVESTIGATORS HAVE UNEARTHED

E-MAILS REVIEWED BY NBC WHICH

REVEAL REPEATED WARNINGS BY

GOVERNMENT STAFF BEARS THE LOAN.

"THIS DEAL IS NOT RETREAD FOR

PRIME TIME"

DAYS BEFORE FINAL APPROVAL A

WARNING THAT ONE MODEL SHOWED

THE PROJECT WOULD RUN OUT OF

CASH IN SEPTEMBER 2011.

( LAUGHTER )

>> Jon: BURN ON YOU.

SOLYNDRA WENT OUT OF BUSINESS,

SEPTEMBER 6, 2011.

ON THE PLUS SIDE, HOW ABOUT A

LITTLE SOMETHING FOR FACELESS

BUREAUCRATS?

I ALMOST HESITATE TO ASK THIS,

BUT IS THERE ANY FORMULATION OF

THE SOLYNDRA BUSINESS MODEL THAT

WOULD PERHAPS PAINT THIS IN EVEN

MORE STARK WAYS THE FOOLISHNESS

OF OUR INVESTMENT.

>> SOME FINANCIAL ANALYSTS WHO

STUDIED THE INDUSTRY SAYS

SOLYNDRA'S BUSINESS PLAN TO

BUILD SOLAR PANELS OF FATALLY

FLAWED FROM BEGINNING.

>> THEIR PRICE IS OVER $6 TO

PRODUCE THE PRODUCT.

THEY WERE SELLING IT AT ABOUT

$3.

BUT WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THE

NUMBERS, IT JUST DIDN'T WORK.

( LAUGHTER )

>> Jon: I WONDER IF THAT'S

WHY MY BUSINESS, JOHNNY'S

CAPITOL HILL 10 BILL GET ONE

FREE BUY ONE EMPORIUM, DIDN'T

WORK BECAUSE I HAD PLENTY OF

VOLUME.

( LAUGHTER )

YOU KNOW, STORIES ABOUT

INCOMPETENCE IN GOVERNMENT ARE

ONLY GOING TO GET YOU SO FAR,

THOUGH.

FOR THIS TO TRULY BECOME A

WEAPONS-GRADE POLITICAL FODDER,

YOU'RE GOING TO NEED

INCOMPETENCE WITH MORE THAN JUST

A WHIFF OF SINISTER CRONYISM.

>> ACCORDING TO WHITE HOUSE

LOGES, ONE OF SOLYNDRA'S

PRINCIPAL INVEST ORGANIZE GEORGE

KAISER, WHO WAS A BIG OBAMA

FUND-RAISER, VISITED THE WHITE

HOUSE AT LEAST FOUR TIMES BEFORE

THE LOPE'S FINAL APPROVAL TO SEE

AIDES.

>> Jon: I RARELY USE THIS

LINE FOR BLATANT PUBLIC SERVICE

ANNOUNCEMENT, BUT IF I MAY, FOX

NEWS, CALL YOUR DOCTOR BECAUSE

THE ERECTION YOU CURRENTLY HAVE

HAVE...

( LAUGHTER )

( APPLAUSE )

IS GOING TO LAST LONGER THAN

FOUR HOURS.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

WOW.

JUST HOW BAD IS IT?

JUST HOW BAD IS THIS FOR THE

ADMINISTRATION?

YOU KNOW HOW WHENEVER THERE'S A

SCANDAL CONGRESS HOLDS A HEARING

TO INVESTIGATE THE MATTER BUT

THEY USUALLY JUST PROVE

THEMSELVES TO BE CLUELESS GRAND

STANDERS.

WATCH THE CONGRESS FROM

CALIFORNIA LAY SERIOUS SOLAR

SHAQ DOWN ON THE DIRECTOR OF THE

DEPARTMENT OF ENERGY'S LOAN

PROGRAM.

>> WERE YOU INFORMED THERE HAVE

BEEN MORE FALSE STARTS AND

FAILURES IN THIN FILMS.

WERE YOU AWARE AS WE TALK ABOUT

CHINA, CHINA HAS CONCENTRATED

ALMOST OSTENSIBLY IN POLLY

CRYSTAL TECHNOLOGY AND AVOID

THIN FILM?

>> Jon: AT LOT OF LONGLAST

HAVE YOU NO CALCULATION OF THE

ABILITY OF SOLAR FLARES AND THE

PHOTO SYNTHETIC ALGORITHM, SIR.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE

( BLEEP ) THAT CONGRESSMAN FROM

CALIFORNIA IS TALKING ABOUT, BUT

HERE'S THE THING-- HE DOES.

DEAR LORD, IN A SITUATION LIKE

THIS, WHO WILL HAVE THE LAST

WORD?

THE MOST IRONIC WORD, WORDS THAT

WERE PERHAPS SPOKEN BY A VIDEO

CHAT ON THE OCCASION OF THE

GROUNDBREAKING OF SOLYNDRA'S

NOW-SHUTTERED PLANT?

>> ONCE YOUR FACILITY OPENS,

THERE WILL BE ABOUT 1,000

PERMANENT NEW JOBS HERE AT

SOLYNDRA, AND IN THE SURROUNDING

BUSINESS COMMUNITY, AND HUNDREDS

MORE TO INSTALL YOUR GROWING

OUTPUT OF SERIAL PANELS

THROUGHOUT THE COUNTRY.

IT'S IMPORTANT, IT'S IMPORTANT

BECAUSE THESE JOBS ARE GOING TO

BE PERMANENT JOBS.

( LAUGHTER )

>> Jon: YOU KNOW, JOE, I

HATE TO SAY THIS, BUT THERE'S

REALLY NO SUCH THING AS A

PERMANENT JOB.

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