On Her Vagesty's Secret Service & Mitt Needs Moms

  • Aired:  04/16/12
  •  | Views: 108,045

A Secret Service prostitution scandal overshadows President Obama's Colombia trip, and Hilary Rosen's remarks about Ann Romney causes a media catastrophe. (4:30)

>> Jon: WE WILL... WELCOME TO THE DAILY SHOW.

JON STEWART.

OUR GUEST TONIGHT, THE GREAT JANE GOODALL, THE WORLD'S FOREMOST EXPERT ON CHIMPS.

OUR TOPIC TONIGHT: THE COMING APE REBELLION.

AND WILL BANANAS SAVE US ALL?

BEFORE WE GET TO THAT, FOLKS.

YOU KNOW I'M A SIMPLE MAN.

ALL I NEED TO BE HAPPY IS A DECENT CHEESE BURGER, A TASTY BREW AND A WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP

FROM ALL MY FAVORITE SPORTS TEAMS AND ON OCCASION WHERE A POWERFUL ORGANIZATION TRIPS ON (BEEP).

>> PRESIDENT OBAMA AT THE WHITE HOUSE FOLLOWING A TRIP TO COLOMBIA, A VISIT THAT WAS

OVERSHADOWED BY A PROSTITUTION SCANDAL INVOLVING MEMBERS OF THE SECRET SERVICE.

>> Jon: AH-AH.

SOMEBODY LOVES ME.

SOMEBODY LOVES ME.

YEAH!

OH, MY GOD.

TO THE POINT-NATOR.

THIS IS GOING TO BE AWESOME!

>> 11 SPECIAL AGENT ALLEGEDLY BROUGHT PROSTITUTES BACK TO THE HOTEL.

THURSDAY MORNING HOTEL MANAGERS REALIZED ONE WOMAN HADN'T PICKED UP HER I.D.BY

CHECKOUT TIME AND FOUND HER IN A ROOM FIGHTING WITH AN AGENT AFTER HE FAILED TO PAY HER.

>> Jon: RED EAGLE, THIS IS VICTORY ONE.

YOU TOLD ME THIS WAS A GROUP-ON DEAL.

THAT'S RIGHT.

THAT'S RIGHT.

CURRENTLY NOT PACKING GREEN BACKS.

NOW I HAVE A CODE.

OH-OH.

THIS STORY SHOULD BE DOMINATING CONGRESSIONAL HEARINGS, COMEDY SHOWS, NEWS

NETWORKS BUT IT'S NOT DOMINATING.

IT CAN'T BECAUSE LAST WEDNESDAY SOME LADY SAID A STUPID THING.

>> WHAT YOU HAVE IS MITT ROMNEY RUNNING AROUND THE COUNTRY SAYING, WELL, YOU KNOW,

MY WIFE TELLS ME THAT WHAT WOMEN REALLY CARE ABOUT ARE ECONOMIC ISSUES.

WHEN I LISTEN TO MY WIFE THAT'S WHAT I'M HEARING.

GUESS WHAT.

HIS WIFE HAS ACTUALLY NEVER WORKED A DAY IN HER LIFE.

>> Jon: AND (BEEP) THE STORM IN THREE.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

JUST CUE IT.

YES, THAT STUPID REMARK TRIGGERED A FAWN MEDIA (BEEP) CATASTROPHE.

IT WAS ON EVERY NEWS NETWORK.

MEET THE PRESS.

FACE THE NATION.

IT WAS EVERYWHERE.

>> TO RAISE CHILDREN IS THE MOST NOBLE JOB ON THE PLANET.

IT IS THE HARDEST JOB ON THE PLANET.

>> Jon: GOD BLESS.

RAISING FIVE KIDS VERY HARD.

THE HARDEST JOB ON THE PLANET.

TELL US TO THE DOCTOR.

SPACE NEUROSURGEON.

FOR ACCEPTS, NURSE.

THERE THEY GO.

HIS BRAIN IS GOING.

OH, GRAVITY.

( APPLAUSE ) SPACE NEUROSURGEON IS PROBABLY THE HARDEST JOB.

THE EASIEST JOB WAS FILLING UP FOX'S PROGRAMMING AFTER ROSEN'S COMMENTS.

THERE WASN'T A SHOW, THERE WASN'T A SATELLITE INTERVIEW,

THERE WASN'T A DAY THAT WENT BY THAT FOX DID NOT TURN THE FULL FORCE OF THEIR IRE ON TO

THE NEW POSTER CHILD FOR ELITE HOMEMAKER SNOB.

ALL BLAZING WITH RIGHTEOUS YET SOMEWHAT NURTURING INDIGNATION.

>> I CAN'T THINK OF A MORE DEMEANING COMMENT TO MAKE ABOUT MOTHERS.

IT'S SUCH A DISCONNECT WITH SO MANY PEOPLE WHO LOVE THEIR MOTHERS AND THEIR GRANDMOTHERS.

>> SHE WAS PLAYING CLASS WARFARE WITH GENDER.

>> IT WAS A TERRIBLE MISTAKE.

>> THIS IS A GRENADE ESSENTIALLY.

>> I THINK IT'S MORE THAN JUST A WAR ON THE FAMILY.

IT'S A WAR ON TRADITION.

>> CONTEMPT FOR ALL CONSERVATIVE MOMS.

>> THE COMMENTS THAT ROSEN MADE TODAY HAVE AWAKENED MANY MAMA GRIZZLIES ACROSS THE NATION.

>> Jon: TO BE FAIR, IT IS ALSO SPRING.

QUICK SIDE NOTE PLAN'S PIN IS A BAROMETER THAT TELLS YOU WHAT SIDE OF THE CULTURE WARS

YOU'RE ON.

PATRIOTIC REAL AMERICANS REAL IT LIKE THIS.

BUT IF YOU'RE FROM NEW JERSEY AND AN EAST COAST LIBERAL ELITE YOU THINK IT'S A TONGUE

IN CHEEK HOMAGE TO THE SOPRANOS.

>> SHE WAS A WHO-A.

>> Jon: I GUESS WHAT I'M SAYING IS THERE'S AN OUTSIDE

CHANCE THAT SARAH PALIN'S PIN IS JUS

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