Indecision 2012 - Indecision Edition - Chris Christie's Answer

  • Aired:  09/28/11
  •  | Views: 93,861

The inscrutable Chris Christie continues to confound pundits hoping for a straight answer regarding his intentions to run for president. (3:56)

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

>> Jon: HEY, EVERYBODY.

WELCOME TO "THE DAILY SHOW."

MY NAME IS JON STEWART.

WE HAVE A GOOD ONE FOR YOU

TONIGHT.

OH, MY GOSH, WE GOT A GOOD ONE

FOR YOU TONIGHT.

BILL O'REILLY, MY OLD FRIEND BY

O'REILLY IS GOING TO BE ON THE

PROGRAM, AN I'LL SAY IT RIGHT

NOW, YOU CAN WATCH THE REST OF

IT ON THE WEB.

THAT'S RIGHT.

[LAUGHTER]

AS WE SAY IN THE OLD

NEIGHBORHOOD, [BLEEPED].

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

WE BEGIN... WE DON'T ACTUALLY

SAY THAT.

[LAUGHTER]

VERY RESPECTFUL IN THE OLD

NEIGHBORHOOD.

WE BEGIN TONIGHT WITH THE

REPUBLICAN FIELD FOR THE

PRESIDENCY, WHICH DESPITE NOW

BOASTING NO FEWER THAN EIGHT

VIABLE CANDIDATES AND NEWT

GINGRICH HAS STILL LEFT THE

REPUBLICAN BASE LOOKING FOR

ALTERNATIVES, BUT ARE THERE

ALTERNATIVES LOOKING FOR THEM?

IT'S THE SUBJECT OF TONIGHT'S

INDECISION 2012 INDECISION

EDITION.

CHRIS CHRISTIE, NEW JERSEY

GOVERNOR AND PART-TIME BOBBY

BAKALA IMPERSONATOR SPOKE LAST

NIGHT AT THE HOLIEST SITE IN

REPUBLICANISM, THE REAGAN

LIBRARY, AND WAS PROPOSITIONED

ALMOST IMMEDIATELY.

>> ARE YOU RECONSIDERING OR ARE

YOU STANDING FIRM?

>> LISTEN, I'LL BE REALLY

SUCCINCT ABOUT THIS.

I SAW SOMETHING GREAT ON THE

POLITICAL WEB SITE, AND I DON'T

MEAN TO BE AN ADVERTISER FOR

PLITICO, BUT THEY PUT 1:353 OF

MY ANSWERS BACK TO BACK TO BACK

TO BACK.

EVERYONE GO TO POLITICO.COM.

IT'S ON THE FRONT PAGE.

CLICK ON IT.

THOSE ARE THE ANSWERS.

>> Jon: OH, IT'S LIKE A

TREASURE HUNT.

I LOVE IT.

IT'S LIKE A LIVE LINKING TO

ANOTHER WEB SITE.

FOLLOW THE CLUES AND REVEAL THE

SECRET MESSAGE.

>> YOU'RE STILL SAYING

CATEGORICALLY NOT RUNNING.

>> I'M NOT RUNNING.

I'M 100% CERTAIN I'M NOT GOING

TO RUN.

>> I DON'T WANT THE RUN.

I DON'T FEEL LIKE I'M READY TO

RUN.

FIRST IN YOUR HEART YOU HAVE TO

WANT IT MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE.

I DON'T WANT IT THAT BADLY.

>> Jon:, INSECURITIABLE.

WHEN URGED TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT,

CHRIS CHRISTIE POINTS PEOPLE TO

A TWO-MINUTE MONTAGE OF

UNEQUIVOCAL, NO, I AM NOT

RUNNING.

INTERPRET THAT FOR US, OH GREAT

POLITICAL PUNDITS.

>> NEW JERSEY GOVERNOR CHRIS

CHRISTIE APPEARS TO LEAVE THE

DOOR SLIGHTLY OPEN.

>> CHRISTIE LEFT THE DOOR

SLIGHTLY OPEN.

>> FOR HIMSELF.

>> CHRIS CHRISTIE HAS LEFT THE

DOOR OPEN EVER SO SLIGHTLY.

>> JUST A SLIVER OPEN.

HE LEFT A LITTLE SLIVER OPEN.

>> CHRISTIE'S COMMENTS

ESPECIALLY ARE A RORSCHACH TEST,

SEE WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE, HEAR

WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR.

>> YOU HEAR WHAT YOU WANT TO

HEAR.

EVERYONE ELSE HEARS, I'M NOT

RUNNING.

A RORSCHACH TEST?

YEAH, YEAH, IT'S A RORSCHACH

TEST.

IT'S A RORSCHACH TEST.

TELL ME WHAT YOU SEE.

WHAT DO YOU SEE?

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

WAS THAT A BUTTERFLY HUMPING A

MONGOOSE?

[LAUGHTER]

HE SAID NO.

AND IF I REMEMBER FROM MY

FRESHMAN DORM ORIENTATION

CORRECTLY, NO MEANS NO!

SO BACK UP, NO, OH, COME ON,

BABY, CAN'T WE JUST FORM AN

EXPLORATORY COMMITTEE.

COME ON, LET ME TOUCH YOUR

SUPER PAC.

NO CHRIS CHRISTIE HAS GIVEN YOU

HIS ANSWER.

STOP GRINDING UP AGAINST HIM AND

ASKING IF YOU CAN JUST PUT THE

TIP IN.

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

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