Gas Hole

  • Aired:  09/28/10
  •  | Views: 75,201

Aasif Mandvi imagines what a children's birthday party will look like without helium balloons. (4:58)

YOU KNOW, OUR NATURAL RESOURCES

MUST BE CARED FOR OR TREASURES.

IF WE DON'T DO THAT, SOME OF

THEM COULD DISAPPEAR IN THIN

AIR.

AASIF MANDVI FILED THIS REPORT.

>> OUR INSATIABLE SUPPLY OF OIL

HAS PUSHED US TO THE BRINK.

BUT WE'VE LOT SIGHT OF A GREATER

CRISIS.

>> WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF HELIUM.

>> THE HELIUM MAY RUN OUT?

>> IT WILL RUN OUT, YES AND WHEN

IT'S GONE, IT'S GONE.

>> WAIT A MINUTE, THE HELIUM IS

RUNNING OUT?

>> THAT'S CORRECT.

>> WHAT?

ARRRRGH!

WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF HELIUM.

OH, MY GOD, HELP US.

THE HELIUM IS RUNNING OUT.

THE HELIUM.

THE HELIUM, OH, MY GOD.

THE HELIUM!

TAKE ME TO THE WHITE HOUSE.

WAIT A SECOND, WHY DO WE CARE

ABOUT HELIUM?

>> HELIUM IS USED FOR MAGNETS,

CRYOGENICS,S, PARTICLE

ACCELERATORS, MRIS IN THE

HOSPITAL, PARTY BALLOONS.

>> WAIT, WAIT, WAIT THERE WOULD

BE NO MORE PARTY BALLOONS?

>> THAT'S WHERE WE'RE GOING.

>> DEAR GOD!

NOOOO OH, MY GOD NO MORE PARTY

BALLOONS.

NO MORE PARTY BALLOONS.

AND THIS LOOMING CAN A FIDEL

CASTRO IF I WILL -- CATASTROPHE

WILL DEVASTATE ONE OF OUR MOST

VITAL INJURIES.

OKAY SEND IN THE CLOWNS.

[LAUGHTER]

GOOD HOW WOULD THE HELIUM CRISIS

EFFECT BIRTHDAY PARTIES?

>> YOUR BUSINESS WILL BE

DESTROYED.

>> I HAVE A LOT OF OTHER CRAP I

DO.

>> WHAT OTHER CRAP DO YOU DO?

>> A LITTLE BIT OF MIMES,

CLOWNING.

I MIGHT DO MAGIC TRICKS.

>> MAGIC TRICKS?

>> LOOK AT THIS RIGHT HERE.

TAKE THIS.

>> WHAT IS THAT?

>> IT'S AN ILLUSION.

IT'S A JOKE.

>> PORNOGRAPHIC.

STOP DOING THAT.

>> IT'S A LITTLE JOKE.

>> BELIEVE ME DON'T DO THAT AT A

BIRTHDAY PARTY.

WHAT ISN'T A JOKE IS THAT OUR

HELIUM SUPPLY IS RUNNING OUT.

IF SCIENTISTS LIKE THESE CAN'T

FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE MORE,

SOMEONE HRELS HAVE TO.

DON'T DO THAT!

>> THE MOST ABUNDANT ELEMENT IN

THE UNIVERSE IS?

>> HYDROGEN.

>> WHICH IS REPRESENTED BY H.

ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS ADD AN E

TO HYDROGEN AND YOU HAVE HELIUM.

>> THAT DOESN'T WORK.

>> I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND

IT.

>> I UNDERSTAND IT.

>> YOU DO?

>> BUT YOU DON'T.

WHAT YOU ARE PROPOSING IS

AGAINST THE LAWS OF NATURE.

>> RIGHT, LET'S BE OUTLAWS.

[LAUGHTER]

IF SCIENCE WON'T LISTEN TO

REASON, IT WILL MEAN SAYING

GOODBYE TO SOMETHING EVERYBODY

LOVES.

>> I JUST WANTED TO -- WONDERED

WHEN A BIRTHDAY PARTY WITH

CHILDREN WOULD LOOK BHIEK --

LOOK LIKE WITHOUT HELIUM

BALLOONS.

>> THAT WON'T BE MY DEPARTMENT

ANYWAY.

IT'S DECORATORS.

I DON'T I HAVE ANYTHING AGAINST

HELIUM BALLOONS I DON'T

PERSONALLY USE THEM.

>> ALL I'M SAYING IS THAT THE

WORD IS NOT AS HAPPY A PLACE

WITHOUT HELIUM BALLOONS.

IS THAT (bleep) BALLOON BEHIND

ME AGAIN?

>> I THINK YOU ARE ANGRY.

>> (bleep) YOU CLOWN.

>> (bleep) YOU.

>> SORRY, (bleep) YOU.

>> OH, YEAH, LOOK AT THIS.

(bleep) YOU.

>> YEAH, YEAH, OH, OH, I GOT A

GIFT FOR YOU.

LET ME TURN IT UP.

(bleep) YOU.

>> I HAVEN'T SEEN THAT ONE

AGAIN.

(bleep) YOU.

>> SOMETHING IS CALLING THEY

SAID (bleep) YOU.

>> (bleep) WHO THE (bleep)

ARE YOU ANYWAY?

>> (bleep) YOU.

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> I THINK THIS EXPERIENCE VIEW

WENT PRETTY WELL.

>> NOT BAD.

>> SO WHO DO WE HAVE TO THANK

FOR ALL THIS?

THE CLOWNS IN CONGRESS WHO

MANDATES WE SELL-OFF THE ENTIRE

HELIUM RESERVE BY 2015 LEAVING

FUTURE GENERATIONS TO PAY THE

PRICE.

>> THE COST OF HELIUM IS GOING

TO GO UP DRAMATICALLY.

YOUR PARTY BLOOPS MIGHT COST

$1,000.

>> HUH?

SUDDENLY I STARTED TO SEE THIS

PROBLEM IN A WHOLE NEW LIGHT.

IF YOU ARE CONCERNED ABOUT THE

ECONOMY, I HAVE TWO WORDS FOR

YOU: HELIUM.

CALL HELIUM LINES TO TALK TO ONE

OF OUR EXPERT ACCOUNT

EXECUTIVES.

PRAY ON IT, DON'T THINK ABOUT IT

AND THEN GIVE HELIUM LINE A

CALL.

DIAL THE NUMBER ON YOUR SCREEN

NOW TO REQUEST YOUR FREE

INVESTOR KITT.

>> HELIUM IT'S ONE INVESTMENT

THAT

Loading...