Totally Non Gay All Male Tackle-Fest XLVII Feat. Beyonce - Violence & Consumerism

  • Aired:  02/04/13
  •  | Views: 48,529

Super Bowl ads question the nature of love, and Baltimore Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis offers up a novel defense for his past involvement in a double murder. (4:09)

THAT?

THE WINS AND LOSSES BLACK OUT THE PERFORMANCE ASIDE, THE REAL CONTEST TOOK PLACE AMONGST

AMERICA'S FOREMOST PRODUCTS WHO COMPETED FOR THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE BUZZED ABOUT.

WITH AN ESTIMATED GLOBAL AUDIENCE OF EVERYBODY.

THE SUPER BOWL IS THE COMPANY'S BEST CHANCE TO GET ITS MESSAGE ACROSS TO AMERICA.

MESSAGES LIKE OUR CANDY FEELS PAIN WHEN YOU EAT IT.

AND OUR CHIPS ARE SO GOOD, EVEN A GOAT WILL EAT THEM.

INTERESTINGLY THOUGH, THAT AD WASN'T THE ONE THAT WOUND UP BEING THE MOST TALKED ABOUT.

>> IT MIGHT BE THE MOST CONTROVERSIAL AD OF THE SUPER BOWL, THIS AD FROM GODADDY

CALLED PERFECT MATCH WHERE SUPER MODEL BAR RAFAELI LOCKS LIPS WITH A GEEKY-LOOKING ENGINEER

>> Jon: BECAUSE SHE WAS KISSING A JEW?

IS THAT WHY?

OH, IT'S SO DISGUSTING TO KISS A JEW.

IS THAT IT?

WHAT'S THAT?

I'M BEING TOLD THAT THAT'S NOT WHY PEOPLE WERE UPSET.

THE SOURCE WAS APPARENTLY AMERICA'S BELIEF THAT AFFECTION SHOULD ONLY TAKE PLACE BETWEEN LOOKS-EQUALS.

HE'S NOT A... (SCREAMING).

BY THE WAY HOW WAS THIS OBJECTIONABLE?

BUT EVERYBODY WAS PERFECTLY FINE ABOUT THE AD WHERE THE GUY WAS CLEARLY [BLEEP] HIS HORSE.

( APPLAUSE ) I'M NOT SAYING I BLAME HIM.

IT WAS A FINE LACKING HORSE.

IN THE END THE RAVENS PREVAILED.

THE GAME WAS A SWAN SONG FOR 17-YEAR VETERAN LINEBACKER RAY LOOM IT.

RAY LEWIS, I'M SORRY.

SEEN HER PORTRAYED AS A VERY ANGRY BADGER.

THE INSPIRATIONAL FIGURE TO HIS TEAMMATES LEWIS' STORY IS COMPLICATED BY SOME PERSONAL TROUBLES.

A LITTLE MATTER OF... I'LL LET BOOMER EXPLAIN

>> HE WAS INVOLVED IN A DOUBLE MURDER

>> Jon: INVOLVED IN A DOUBLE MURDER.

A LITTLE DOUBLE MURDER.

AS KNUTE ROCKNE USED TO CALL THEM, THE OLD DOUBLE MURDER-OO.

IN THE PREGAME INTERVIEW, RAY LEWIS OFFERED UP A NOVEL DEFENSE FOR HIS ACTIONS

>> WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO SAY TO THE FAMILIES

>> TO THE FAMILY, IF YOU KNEW, IF YOU REALLY KNEW THE WAY GOD WORKS, HE DON'T USE PEOPLE WHO

COMMIT ANYTHING LIKE THAT.

FOR HIS GLORY.

NO WAY.

IT'S THE TOTAL OPPOSITE.

>> Jon: WOW.

MUST BE QUITE THE COMFORT TO FAMILIES OF THOSE MURDER VICTIMS.

THE NEWS THAT GOD MAKES SURE EVERYBODY GETS WHAT THEY DESERVE.

STILL THAT'S THE CASE.

THEN CRIMINAL TRIALS WOULD GO A LOT FASTER.

YOUR HONOR, WHAT EVIDENCE DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE VICTIM'S BLOOD FOUND IN MY CLIENT'S LIMOUSINE?

WOULD GOD ALLOW A MURDERER TO GO TO 13?

I REST MY FAITH.

BY THE END OF THIS LONG AND COMPLICATED DAY OUR SENSES HAD BEEN BEATEN INTO SUBMISSION AND

NUMBED BY EXCESS.

JUST AS I BEGAN TO QUESTION THIS ANNUAL RITUAL OF VIOLENCE AND CONSUMERISM, I SAW THIS ONE

FINAL COMMERCIAL.

>> IN THE ETERNAL DEBATE FOR ANSWERS, THE ONE THING THAT IS TRUE IS WHAT'S TRUE FOR YOU.

>> Jon: AND I REALIZED AFTER SEEING THAT THAT I ACTUALLY

[BLEEP] THE SUPER BOWL.

GUYS GETTING HIT REALLY HARD.

BEER TRUCKS, CHIPS.

I FOUND MY ANSWER SIGHEN TO GO AND IT WAS INSIDE MY REFRIGERATOR THE WHOLE TIME.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

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