Trump-o-Gram - Sell, Baby, Sell

  • Aired:  05/30/12
  •  | Views: 15,886

The country needs a man with unerring confidence, and no one is more confident than Donald Trump, who has his ass kissed in stereo. (3:12)

BLITZER, OR I'LL TRUMPY SO HARD UP YOUR TRUMP YOUR HEAD OF TRUMP.

IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WHOLE BIRTHY TRUMP, TRUMP STILL HAS TIME TO SELL, BABY, SELL.

>> YOU'RE NOT ON A MATTRESS ON TOP OF TRUMP, ARE YOU.

>> IT'S SITTING ON A TRUMP MATTRESS BY CERTA.

IT'S A GREAT MATTRESS.

YOU SHOULD BUY ONE.

>> A TRUMP MATTRESS.

>> BY CERTA.

>> Jon: JUST BECAUSE YEAR SLEEPING ON IT DOESN'T MAKE IT A TRUMP MATTRESS.

I DON'T SLEEP IN STEWART SHEETS.

IT DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY.

"HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT I HAD FOR BREAKFAST?

TRUMP MUFFINS BY THOMASES?

I LIKE HOW THE BUTTER GOES INTO THE NOOKS AND TRUMPS." ( LAUGHTER )

AND WE HAVE TO COVER ROMNEY AND OBAMA KNOWING THIS BEAUTIFUL MAN IS OUT THERE?

( LAUGHTER ) THIS RARE BIRD THAT ORANGE BIZARRELY TUFTED FLAPPING AROUND IN THE FOREST?

WE HAVE TO COVER THESE TWO NUMB NUTS?

IT'S LIKE YOU'RE AT A MUSIC FESTIVAL AND THE POO FIGHTERRERS

ARE ON THE STAGE BUT YOU CAN'T GO BECAUSE YOU PROMISED YOUR FRIEND YOU'D GO TO A COUNTRY BAND.

I'M NOT INSULTING HIPSTERS.

OBVIOUSLY, THEY DON'T WATCH.

( LAUGHTER ) SERIOUSLY, A BAND SHOULDN'T HAVE SOMEONE ON THE... THESE ARE TOUGH TIMES.

WE NEED A MAN WITH UNERRING CONFIDENCE.

AND NO ONE IS MORE CONFIDENT THAT A GUY WHOSE EVERY TELEVISION EPISODE ENDS WITH HIM

HAVING HIS ASS KISSED IN STEREO.

>> I THINK YOU MADE THE RIGHT DECISION.

>> I AGREE.

>> CATHERINE?

>> YES, SIR, I AGREE 100%.

>> I AGREE.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> I AGREE 100%.

>> THAT WAS A VERY TOUGH DECISION.

>> IT REALLY WAS.

>> I DO NOT ENVY YOU.

>> I THINK YOU MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE.

>> I THINK YOU MADE THE RIGHT DECISION, IN THIS CASE I DON'T THINK YOU HAD A CHOICE.

>> IT WAS THE RIGHT CALL.

>> DO YOU FEEL OKAY.

NA?

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> YOU WERE RIGHT ON ABOUT THE FIRE.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> WHAT DID YOU THINK?

>> AFTER THAT COMMENT, I THINK YOU MADE THE RIGHT DECISION.

>> Jon:ONALD TRUMP'S EGO IS LIKE A GOOSE LIVER THAT'S BEEN

FORCE FED PRAISETHROUGH ITS EAR TUBES SO THAT WHEN YOU CONSUME IT YOU DON'T TASTE ATSOUANT OF

SELF-DOUBT, AND THAT IS WHY I MUST DO THIS.

DONALD, YOU HAVE TO GET BACK INTO THE RACE FOR PRESIDENT.

I'M NOT JUST SAYING THIS BECAUSE IT WOULD HELP ME.

OH, MY GOD.

( LAUGHTER ) COME OVER.

WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT.

WE'LL HAVE DINNER.

YOU BRING A PITA, AND IN A GESTURE OF ECSTASY GOOD WILL,

I'LL BRING TWO

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