Judge Johnny - Joe Biden

  • Aired:  07/30/13
  •  | Views: 23,174

Judge Johnny codifies a legal precedent concerning Joe Biden and illegally discharged shotguns. (2:23)

JASON, PLEASE CALL OUR FINAL

DEFENDANT.

>> SURE WILL, JUDGE JOHNNY.

THE COURT CALLS JOSEPH R.

BIDEN,, Jr., THE DELAWARE

DESTROYER, HE'S GOT A LION'S

HEART, A SAILOR'S MOUTH AND SOME

OTHER DUDE'S HAIR.

HE LOVES TRAINS BUT HE JUST GOT

ON AN EXPRESS TO JUSTICE TOWN

WHERE THE MAYOR IS JUDGE JOHNNY.

LOOKS LIKE VICE PRESIDENT

BIDEN'S ABOUT TO EAT A JUSTICE

SALAD.

>> OKAY.

THANKS VERY MUCH, JASON.

LET'S HEAR THE CHARGES.

>> IN WASHINGTON STATE ACCUSED

OF ILLEGALLY DISCHARGING HIS

SHOTGUN HE'S USING A NEW LEGAL

TECHNIQUE HENCEFORTH KNOWN AS

THE BIDEN DEFENSE.

>> John: THE BIDEN DEFENSE?

THAT'S ACTUALLY A CHESS MOVE

WHERE IF YOU'RE LOSING YOU JUST

EAT YOUR OPPONENT'S QUEEN.

HOW HAS A GUY WHO FIRED A

SHOTGUN GOT ANYTHING TO DO WITH

THE VICE PRESIDENT?

>> HE CLAIMS HE WAS TRYING TO

SCARE OFF WOULD-BE CAR PROWLERS

BUT DEPUTIES SAY HE WENT ABOVE

THE LAW.

>> I DID WHAT JOE BIDEN TOLD ME

TO DO.

I WENT OUTSIDE AND FIRED MY

SHOTGUN IN THE AIR.

>> John: COME ON.

HE DID NOT TELL YOU TO DO THAT.

THERE IS NO WAY THAT BIDEN

LITERALLY TOLD YOU YOU SHOULD GO

AND GET A SHOTGUN AND FIRE TWO

BLASTS OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE.

>> IF YOU WANT TO PROTECT

YOURSELF, GET A DOUBLE-BARREL

SHOTGUN.

IF THERE'S EVER A PROBLEM JUST

WALK OUT ON THE BALCONY HERE,

WALK OUT, PUT THAT DOUBLE-BARREL

SHOTGUN AND FIRE TWO BLASTS

OUTSIDE THE HOUSE.

SNOB A LITTLE ADVICE FOR TRICK

OR TREATERSALITY JOE BIDEN'S

HOUSE, IF HE'S NOT OFFERING YOU

A TREAT, RUN.

LOOK, THIS MAN DIDN'T ACTUALLY

SHOOT ANYONE SO WHAT IS THE

PROBLEM.

>> PROSECUTORS AND SHERIFF

DEPUTIES SAY THE WAY THE LAW IS

WRITTEN DOESN'T AFFORD PEOPLE

THE RIGHT TO JUST FIRE OFF THEIR

GUNS.

THERE MUST BE A SELF-DEFENSE

COMPONENT.

>> John: THERE MUST BE A

SELF-DEFENSE COMPONENT.

FOR EXAMPLE, SAY THE PERSON HAD

BEEN WEARING A HOODIE, THEN YOU

WOULD BE FINE.

THIS IS A TOUGH CASE.

ON ONE HAND PEOPLE PROBABLY

SHOULDN'T JUST FIRE SHOTGUN

BLASTS INTO THE AIR.

ON THE OTHER HAND, THE VICE

PRESIDENT LITERALLY TOLD ME TO.

THAT'S A PRETTY SOLID DEFENSE.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I AM GOING TO RULE ON THIS.

IF THERE'S ONE LEGAL PRECEDENT

SET BY THIS CASE, IT SHOULD BE

FOR GOD'S SAKE IGNORE JOE BIDEN.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

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