Louis C.K.

  • Aired:  06/28/11
  •  | Views: 656,322

Louis C.K. explains why you don't have to be smart to laugh at farts, but you have to be stupid not to. (6:19)

>> WELCOME BACK.

MY GUEST TONIGHT, VERY FUNNY

COMEDIAN.

HIS SHOW FX'S "LOUIS."

THANK GOODNESS IT'S BACK FOR

ANOTHER SEASON.

>> IT'S A MOTHER DOG.

IT'S A MOTHER DOG LIKE 14-NIPPLE

BELLY.

THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS IF I GO LIKE

THIS.

IT'S HAPPENING NOW, YOU JUST

CAN'T SEE IT.

IT'S A SIX PACK FOR A WHOLE

OTHER REASON.

IT JUST HANGS IN SECTIONS.

IT ACTUALLY IS THREE SECTIONS

WITH A SPLIT IN THE MIDDLE.

>> Jon: PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO

THE SHOW "LOUIS"CK.

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

>> THAT WAS REALLY FUNNY.

>> Jon: GREAT TO SEE YOU.

>> THANK YOU.

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

>> Jon: I'M SO GLAD THE SHOW

IS BACK ON.

>> THANK YOU

>> Jon: YOU WANT TO DO IT

AGAIN?

>> I DON'T WANT TO SHAKE.

I JUST WANT US TO HOOVER.

>> Jon: DO THE HOVER SHAKE.

FIRST EPISODE WAS SO GOOD.

>> THANK YOU.

JON AND YOUR ACTING NOW IS

GETTING GOOD.

>> YOU WERE DESCRIBING IT.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE SAYING,

"YOU'RE ACTING NOW," WHICH IS

THE WAY IT FEELS.

IT FEELS GOOFY.

>> Jon: YOU AND I HAVE WORKED

TOGETHER FOR SO MANY YEARS.

AND WE ALL SUCKED.

THEY ALWAYS WANTED TO MAKE US

ACTEDDORS AND WE ALL SUCKED AT

IT.

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU BECAME

GOOD.

WAIT.

WHAT ABOUT TAKING THE REST OF US

WITH YOU.

>> I HAVE MORE PRACTICE, THAT'S

ALLMENT I'VE JUST DONE IT FOR

LONGER.

I STILL SUCK PRETTY BAD, THOUGH.

>> Jon: STOP IT.

FIRST EPISODE, THE WOMAN WHO

PLAYED YOUR SISTER.

>> ARE RUSTY SCHWIMMER.

>> Jon: SO GOOD.

>> SHE'S GREAT.

JANUARY JON CAN WE SAY FIRST

EPISODE WHAT...

>> IT'S ALL ABOUT A BIG FART.

THE WHOLE FIRST EPISODE IS ABOUT

A FART.

AND...

>> Jon: HOW LONG IS THE FART?

>> I THINK IT WAS 42 SECONDS

LONG OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

[LAUGHTER]

ONE-TENTH OF AN EPISODE IS A

FART.

MORE THAN ONE-TENTH.

20% OF THE EPISODE IS A FART.

>> Jon: I DON'T LET YOUR

CHILDREN WATCH YOUR SHOW.

I DON'T LET THEM WATCH MY SHOW,

BUT I BROUGHT THEM IN THE ROOM

FOR THE 42-SECOND FART.

THEY'RE STILL TALKING ABOUT IT.

>> LISTEN, FARTS TAKE A LOT OF

[BLEEPED] FOR BEING...

>> Jon: WHAT?

>> THEY DO.

PEOPLE THINK THAT THAT'S

LOW-BROW HUMOR, STUPID HUMOR.

TO ME A FART IS FUNNY.

FART IS... LET'S BREAK DOWN A

FART FOR A SECOND.

>> Jon: PLEASE.

>> OKAY.

IT COMES OUT OF YOUR ASS.

[LAUGHTER]

OKAY.

IT SMELLS...

>> Jon: I'M GLAD YOU WENT FOR

THAT NUMBER ONE.

>> IT COMES OUT OF YOUR ASS.

IT COMES OUT OF YOUR ASS.

IT SMELLS LIKE POOP.

BECAUSE IT'S BEEN JUST HANGING

OUT NEXT TO IT FOR A LONG TIME.

AND IT MAKES A LITTLE TRUMPET

NOISE.

COME ON, MAN.

WHAT'S NOT FUNNY ABOUT THAT?

YOUR ASS FLESH RUBS TOGETHER AND

IT MAKES A NOISE THAT SMELLS

LIKE POOP THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR

ASS.

THAT'S HILARIOUS.

THAT'S THE FUNNIEST THING IN THE

WORLD.

HERE'S WHAT I WOULD SAY, YOU

DON'T HAVE TO BE SMART TO LAUGH

AT FARTDS, BUT YOU HAVE TO BE

STUPID NOT TO.

>> Jon: FOR THAT, I MEAN, THAT

IS WHY WE INDUCT YOU INTO THE

COMEDY HALL OF FAME.

>> THAT'S RIGHT.

>> Jon: A LOT OF TIMES JOKES

WHEN YOU DECONSTRUCT THEM BECOME

LESS FUNNY.

NOW I THINK FARTS WILL BE EVEN

MORE ENJOYABLE.

THANK YOU.

>> THERE'S A LOT GOING ON.

>> YOU'RE ALWAYS RAGGING ON

YOURSELF.

YOU KNOW, HAVE YOU BEEN IN THE

WORLD?

YOU'RE NOT THE FOOTAGE THEY USE

ON STORIES ABOUT BAD HEALTH.

YOU'RE NOT THAT FOOTAGE FROM YOU

WITH THE HEAD DOWN LIKE, IF

AMERICA DOESN'T GET WISE TO

THIS, WE'LL FALL BEHIND

THAILAND.

>> THERE IS A LOT OF PEOPLE THAT

ARE GROCER THAN I AM.

THAT'S TRUE.

>> Jon: WE ALL ARE.

I'M WEARING A SUIT UNDERNEATH

THIS.

I'M...

>> MAYBE YOU'VE GOT SOME LITTLE

SAG SECTIONS AND A LITTLE BIT

OF... BUT I'M BIG.

[LAUGHTER]

NO, HERE'S THE THING, I'VE

BEEN...

>> Jon: DO YOU WANT TO HAVE A

DECREPIT

>> OFF, IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?

>> I WORK HARD TO MAINTAIN THIS.

THIS IS ME BEING PRESENTABLE TO

THE REST OF THE WORLD.

I'M ON CAMERA AND THERE ARE

PEOPLE STILL IN MY LIFE.

SO I... THIS IS AS GOOD AS I CAN

LOOK.

THAT'S WHY I THINK PEOPLE KEEP

YOU FROM BEING GROSS.

WHEN I'VE DRIVEN EVERYONE AWAY

AND I'M NOT ON TV ANYMORE, I'M

GOING TO BE... I'M JUST GOING

TO... AND I'M EXCITED FOR IT.

I'M JUST GOING TO BE THAT GUY

WITH THE SECOND BELLY, THE

CROTCH BELLY.

YOU KNOW THOSE GUYS WITH

POLYESTER PANTS, AND IT'S JUST,

AND IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE A LITTLE

BUMP WHERE IT'S JUST... IT'S

LIKE A PUMPKIN POP IN THERE.

AND THEN LIKE WHEN I SEE IT

JUST... WHEN I SEE IT JUST

GLISTENS LIKE A... YOU KNOW?

[LAUGHTER]

YOU KNOW THOSE FOUNTAINS WHERE

IT JUST GETS WET ON THE MARBLE

INSTEAD OF GUSHING.

AND WHEN I GET HORNY I'LL

JUST...

>> Jon: SO YOUR BUCKET LIST IS

LITERALLY JUST FOODS IN A

BUCKET.

>> THAT'S WHAT I'M GOING TO BE

AND I'M GOING THE MAKE IT.

IT'S NOT HARD GOAL.

HERE'S THE THING, I THINK

PEOPLE, THEIR NATURAL STATE IS

TO JUST EAT FRITOS AND JUST

[BLEEPED] YOUR PANTS AND DIE.

OSAMA BIN LADEN, WHEN THEY

CAUGHT HIM, HE WAS DRINKING

COCA-COLA AND GETTING HIGH AND

WATCHING PORN AND LIKE GOOGLING

HIMSELF IN A BLANKET.

LIKE HE WAS JUST... I THOUGHT

WHEN THEY CAUGHT HIM HE'D BE IN

A CAVE WITH TWO GRENADES

INTENSE, BUT HE WAS JUST GOING

BACK TO HIS ROOM WITH HIS SNACK,

OH, BHEEP BLEEP.

OH, THAT'S RIGHT, I DID THAT

THING.

LIKE HE JUST... HE HAD SOME

NACHOS

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