Georgia vs. Tennessee

  • Aired:  09/18/13
  •  | Views: 68,161

Al Madrigal investigates a dispute between Georgia and the butt-chuggers of Tennessee. (5:15)

>> HEY, WELCOME BACK.

YOU KNOW, HERE IN NEW YORK, HEREIN NEW YORK AND THE NORTHEAST,

WE HAVE OUR OWN SPECIAL BRAND OFWARMTH.

BEST SUMMED UP AS, YOULOOKING AT ME?

ADMITTEDLY, OUR SOUTHERNBROTHERS COULD TEACH US A LESSON

IN MANNERS, OR SO WE THOUGHT.

AL MADRIGAL HAS MORE.

>> THE SOUTH IS KNOWN FOR ITSHOSPITALITY, SO YOU CAN IMAGINE

WHEN GEORGIA ASKED TENNESSEE FORA LITTLE DRINKING WATER THAT THE

VOLUNTEER STATE WOULD BE MORETHAN HAPPY TO HELP.

>> GEORGIA CAN KEEP ITS GREEDYHANDS OFF OUR LAND AND ITS

THIRSTY MOUTHS AWAY FROM OURWATER.

>> IT'S OUR LAND, IT'S OURWATER.

THE BORDER WAS DRAWN ALMOST 200YEARS AGO.

THE LAND HAS BEEN TENNESSEE'SFOR ALMOST 200 YEARS.

WE'RE GOING TO DEFEND OUR BORDERAND PROTECT OUR RESOURCES.

>> OKAY.

WELL, I GUESS THE PROBLEM ISTHAT GEORGIA WANTS TO MOVE THE

BORDER FROM HERE ALL THE WAYHERE, WHERE IT WAS ORIGINALLY

MEANT TO BE BEFORE A SURVEYINGERROR COST THEM ACCESS TO THE

RIVER.

DADE COUNTY CHAIRMAN TEDRUMLEY

>> IT'S ACTUALLY OUR LANDACCORDING TO OUR SURVEY RIGHTS.

WE'RE IN DIRE NEED OF WATER.

ATLANTA ESPECIALLY THE ATLANTAREGION.

>> IS THAT WHY HONEY BOO BOO ISFORCED TO DRINK SO MANY RED

BULLS, BECAUSE OF THE WATERSHORTAGE?

>> I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU'RETALKING ABOUT.

>> THE MOST FAMOUS PERSON INYOUR STATE.

>> LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.

>> YOU DON'T FOOL WITH PEOPLE.

IT'S REALLY A SERIOUS ISSUE FORTHE STATE OF GEORGIA.

IT'S NOT SOMETHING REALLY, YOUKNOW TO, JOKE ABOUT.

>> OF COURSE IT ISN'T.

AND WE ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TOFUNNY CITY PEOPLE IN RURAL

GEORGIA.

>> WHAT THE HELL YOU THINKYOU'RE DOING?

>> TO OUTSIDERS, THEY MIGHT SEEMLIKE BICKERING SIBLINGS, BUT THE

BATTLE FOR THEJASPER-CHATTANOOGA CORRIDOR IS

ALREADY GETTING BLOODY.

>> GEORGIA DON'T NEED TO BETRYING TO COME OVER INTO

TENNESSEE AND TAKE SOMETHINGTHAT'S NOT THEIRS.

>> BUT THEY'RE PEOPLE, JUST LIKEYOU.

>> I DON'T REALLY GIVE A[BLEEPED].

>> WHAT DO YOU THINK OFGEORGIA'S CLAIM TO THIS

TERRITORY WE'RE ON RIGHT NOW?

>> NO, THIS IS TENNESSEE.

>> I REALIZE WE'RE IN TENNESSEE,BUT GEORGIA THINKS IT'S GEORGIA.

>> WE'RE IN TENNESSEE.

>> YOU'RE ACTUALLY FROM GEORGIA.

>> YES, SIR.

YES, SIR.

>> I GOT TO BE HONEST, YOU LOOKAND SOUND LIKE YOU'RE FROM

TENNESSEE.

>> OH, BUDDY, NO, NOT AT ALL.

>> YOU GUYS ARE REALLYDIFFERENT?

>> 100% DIFFERENT.

>> OBESITY RATES ARE PRETTYSIMILAR.

>> OBESITY RATES, WELL, IF YOUCAN GET A DOUBLE-DOG

CHEESEBURGER FOR $1, BUDDY,THAT'S THE WAY YOU GOT TO GO.

>> UNFORTUNATELY THIS RAGINGCONFLICT HAS FORCED THE CITIZENS

TO FORTIFY THEIR CARS ASPROTECTION AGAINST THE CONSTANT

ROCKET FIRE ACROSS THE BORDERS.

>> I'M A QUARTER OF A MILE AWAYFROM THE GEORGIA LINE AND YOU

CAN'T MOVE STATE BORDERS.

>> IS IT DIFFICULT LIVING ON THEFRONT LINE?

>> NO.

>> WHEN WAS THE LAST ROCKETATTACK.

>> THERE'S NEVER BEEN ONE HERE.

>> HOW DID IT GET SO [BLEEPED]THEN?

>> THIS IS A GREAT AREA.

GREAT AREA.

>> FOR METH.

>> YES, JUST LIKE THEPALESTINIAN-ISRAELI CONFLICT,

THIS INTRACTABLE WAR OVER A TINYSLICE OF LAND HAS NO END IN

SIGHT.

>> SO YOU ARE LIKE THEPALESTINIANS IN THIS SCENARIO,

RIGHT?

>> WE'RE ACTUALLY THE GEORGIANSTHAT'S TRYING TO CORRECT A

WRONG.

>> WOULD YOU SAY YOU'RE LIKE THEISRAELIS IN THIS CONFLICT?

>> ISRAELIS?

WE AIN'T JEWISH. THIS ISTENNESSEE.

>> SADLY, HATRED BETWEEN THESEGROUPS HAS LED TO UGLY

STEREOTYPES.

>> STUDIES HAVE SHOWN THAT THEPEOPLE OF ATLANTA USE 50% MORE

WATER PER PERSON THANCHATTANOOGANS.

>> SO THEY'RE EXCESSIVE WATERUSERS?

I MEAN, ISN'T THAT JUST AN OLDSTEREOTYPE?

>> LISTEN, WE'D BE HAPPY TO SENDSOME OF OUR SCIENTISTS AND

OTHERS DOWN.

>> WHEN YOU SAY SCIENTIST,YOU'RE BASICALLY CALLING THE

PEOPLE FROM GEORGIA STUPID.

>> HEY, MISTER, LOOK, WE JUSTTURN IT ON.

THAT'S ALL WE KNOW ABOUT WATER.

THAT'S BASICALLY WHAT YOU'RESAYING ABOUT THE PEOPLE IN

GEORGIA.

YES, IT'S GOTTEN SO BAD, THEYREFUSE TO SEE EACH OTHER AS

HUMAN.

>> YOU KNOW WHAT THEY DO DOWNTHERE?

>> WHAT?

>> BUTT CHUG.

>> WHAT'S THAT?

>> THEY GO OUT AND THEY FUNNELDIFFERENT KIND OF BEERS IN THEIR

SPHINCTERS, IN THEIR RECTUMS.

>> SO IN GEORGIA BEER GOES INTHE MOUTH, AND IN TENNESSEE BEER

GOES IN THE...

>> ANUS.

>> JUST WHEN IT SEEMED DARKEST,A SOLUTION PRESENTED ITSELF.

SO THERE IS A ROAD MAP TO PEACE?

>> THERE IS.

>> AND DOES IT OR DOES IT NOTLEAD TO A HOOTERS?

>> WELL, THAT'S YOUR... I DON'TKNOW.

>> IS THERE A HOOTERS NEARBY?

>> 30 MILES.

>> BUT IF THE HOOTERS' SUMMITWERE EVER TO BECOME A REALITY,

WE NEED TO START WITH SIMPLEGESTURES.

THE PEOPLE FROM GEORGIA SENT APEACE OFFERING.

LUBE THAT UP A LITTLE MORE.

THERE YOU GO.

DO WHAT YOU PEOPLE DO.

I CAN GIVE YOU SOME PRIVACY IFYOU WANT TO JUST CHUG THAT IN

PRIVATE.

>> I'M GOOD.

THANKS.

>> Jon: THAT'S SO NOT RIGHT.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

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