Residential Evil

  • Aired:  05/07/13
  •  | Views: 1,995

The Mortgage Electronic Registration System is like a key party, but instead of f**king your wife, they lose track of the deed to your house. (6:26)

(LAUGHTER)

MOVING ON!

GOOD ON YA, FROM CRUSHING

SPIDERS TO CRUSHING DREAMS S

THIS REALLY THE SEGUE WE'RE

GOING GO WITH?

YOU KNOW, WE HEAR THIS ALL

THE TIME.

THE GOVERNMENT IS SO STUPID.

THE FREE MARKET SHOULD RUN

THE COUNTRY.

AYN RAND IS THE BEST AUTHOR

EVER, I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL MY

SENIOR YEAR.

YOU KNOW.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT DID YOU KNOW THE PUBLIC

SECTOR HAS NO MONOPOLY ON

RUINING EVERYTHING?

>> BETWEEN 2009 AND 2010

FORECLOSURE PROCEEDINGS THAT

WERE WRONGFUL OR IN SOME WAY

CONTAINED BANKER ROHR

COMMENCED AGAINST NEARLY 4

MILLION HOMEOWNERS.

>> Jon: 4 MILLION, IT'S ONLY

2 MILLION HOMES A YEAR.

AND THIS IS THE PRIVATE

SECTOR DOING THIS I'M SURE

IT IS EASY FOR THEM TO TRACK

THE PAPERWORK OF THE

MORTGAGES AND CORRECT THE

ERRORS.

>> IT USED TO BE THAT THE

PAPERWORK TRACKING MORTGAGES

WAS EASY TO FIND, FILED AT A

LOCAL RECORDERS OFFICE.

>> Jon: AND REMAINS SO

TODAY.

HMMMM?

THAT IS YOUR STORY, IS IT

NOT?

SINCE THAT SYSTEM IS WORKING

AND PEOPLE WERE VERY HAPPY

WITH IT?

>> BUT MORE THAN A DECADE

AGO BIG MORTGAGE LENDERS SET

UP THEIR OWN ALTERNATIVE

SYSTEM.

IT'S CALLED MERSES, THE

MORTGAGE ELECTRONIC

REGISTRATION SYSTEM.

>> Jon: YOU'RE KIDDING ME!

SO THESE 4 MILLION

FORECLOSURE PROBLEMS, THIS

WAS NO ACCIDENT.

THIS WAS--

(LAUGHTER)

MERS.

(LAUGHTER)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

ALL RIGHT.

SO IT WAS MERS.

HOW DOES MERSES WORK.

>> INSTEAD OF FILING PAPERS

AT A LOCAL COURTHOUSE,

MORTGAGE CHANGES ARE SIMPLY

REGISTERED INSIDE THE MERS

COMPUTER.

BUT WITH NO OFFICIAL PAPER

TRAIL LENDERS ARE NOW

SCRAMBLING TO PRODUCE

DOCUMENTS TO PROVE THEY HAVE

THE RIGHT TO FORECLOSE.

>> Jon: AS IT TURNED OUT THE

BIG BANKS DIDN'T ENJOY

FILLING OUT PAPERWORK.

FOR EVERY SINGLE MORTGAGE.

THEY WANTED TO REASSIGN OR

SECURITY ADVERTISE SO THEY

FORMED A CONSORTIUM.

MORTGAGE DUMPSTER, IF YOU

WILL.

(LAUGHTER)

>> THAT WOULD ALLOW THEM

THESE MORTGAGES TO TRADE

ELECTRONICALLY WITHIN THIS

CORPORATION, THEY WERE ALL

SHAREHOLDERS OF.

THINK OF IT AS A TEA PARTY.

BUT INSTEAD OF [BLEEP] YOUR

WIFE, THEY LOSE TRACK OF THE

DEED TO YOUR HOUSE.

BUT FEAR NOT--

(APPLAUSE)

FEAR NOT.

FEAR NOT, MY SPIDERPHOBIC

FRIENDS.

I'M SURE THERE IS A BETTER

NAME FOR THAT BUT I DON'T

KNOW.

FEAR NOT, THIS TYPE OF

INEVITABLE FREE MARKET

OVERREACH IS WHY THE

GOVERNMENT MUST MAINTAIN ITS

WATCHDOG STATUS GO GET THEM

BOYS.

>> THE OFFICE OF THE

CONTROLLER OF CURRENCY THE

OCC --.

>> Jon: OH YEAH, YOU DOWN

WITH OCC, YEAH!

THE OFFICE OF THE CONTROLLER

OF THE CURRENCY.

BECAUSE THEY SPRUNG INTO

ACTION TO DETERMINE WHICH

HOMES WERE BEING FORECLOSED

UPON INAPPROPRIATELY.

>> INDEPENDENT FORECLOSURE

REVIEW WAS ESSENTIALLY

HAVING BANKS HIRE

INDEPENDENT CONSULTANTS WHO

WERE ON BANK PAYROLLS TO

LOOK AT THE BANK'S OWN

RECORDS.

>> Jon: WE ARE ALONE.

>> THE WHOLE THING WAS SO

BADLY CONCEIVED FROM THE

BEGINNING, AGAIN, THAT THE

OCC FINALLY SAID WE GIVE UP.

>> ABANDONED FOR BEING TOO

COMPLICATED AND FOR HELPING

ALMOST NO ONE.

>> Jon: WHICH IS

COINCIDENTALLY THE OCC'S

MOTTO.

(LAUGHTER)

SO ULTIMATELY--

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: YOU DOWN WITH OCC.

SO ULTIMATELY LIKE MOST

INCREDIBLY COMPLICATED AND

EXTREMELY DESTRUCTIVE

FINANCIAL SCANDALS, THE

PERPETRATORS WENT TO JAIL.

WENT TO JAIL!

I'M A CARD.

I AM A RIOT!

(LAUGHTER)

THEY PULL TRILLIONS OUT OF

THE ECONOMY AND THEY WENT TO

JAIL.

WHAT I MEANT TO SAY WAS THEY

WENT TO THE CARIBBEAN.

(LAUGHTER)

THEY WENT TO THE CARIBBEAN

AFTER PAYING AN INADEQUATE

AND COMPLETELY ARBITRARY

SETTLEMENT OF $9 BILLION.

NO, SERIOUSLY.

THEY ADMITTED IT WAS

COMPLETELY ARBITRARY.

>> TO ESTIMATE THE NUMBER

WOULD HAVE REQUIRED WITH

MORE PRECISION WOULD HAVE

REQUIRED ADDITIONAL DELAY IN

PROVIDING --

>> BUT IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU

PICK A NUMBER OUT OF THE

AIR.

>> Jon: OH.

REALLY?

WHAT'S WRONG, SENATOR.

DON'T YOU LIKE MAGIC?

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: I'M SORRY THAT

ACTUALLY WAS SUPPOSED TO BE

A NUMBER.

(LAUGHTER)

AND I HAVE TERRIBLE

ALLERGIES, SO-- BUT YOU KNOW

WHAT, $9 BILLION WAS THE

PERFECT NUMBER BECAUSE IT'S

A BIG ENOUGH NUMBER TO

IMPRESS CONSUMERS, BUT A

SMALL ENOUGH NUMBER TO TEACH

THE BANKS NO LESSON

WHATSOEVER.

AND IT IS INCREDIBLY

DIVIDABLE ENOUGH TO BE

MEANINGLESS.

>> OUR VIEWERS ARE LOOKING

AT A FULL SCREEN RIGHT HERE

ABOUT WHAT VICTIMS ARE GOING

TO GET.

>> NOT MUCH.

>> 60% AS YOU SAID WILL GET

$300 BUCKS.

>> Jon: WHOOO!

300 BUCKS.

WHICH IS GOOD IF THE HOME

YOU LOST IS ON THE 16th HOLE

OF A MINIATURE GOLF COURSE.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT WITH ALL THAT, WITH

EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED,

WITH FREE MARKET

INCOMPETENCE COUPLED BY

GOVERNMENT IRREGULARLATION,

THEY TOP IT ALL OFF WITH ONE

FINAL KICK TO THE HOMEOWNERS'

NUTS.

>> GOVERNMENT ISSUED CHECKS

TO HOMEOWNERS ARE BOUNCING.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: AH!

SO THAT'S WHY THIS GUY'S

PICTURE IS UP BEHIND THE

REGISTER AT THE BODEGA.

(LAUGHTER)

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