It's Not Delivery, It's D'Economies of Scale

  • Aired:  08/14/12
  •  | Views: 157,936

Papa John CEO John Schnatter warns of increased Affordable Care Act-related pizza costs, while the summer's biblical, crop-killing drought only increases liberal hysteria. (4:01)

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW.

NOW THAT CHICK FLAY HAS PROVED THAT WEARING YOUR BELIEFS ON YOUR CORPORATE SLEEVE CAN SEND

YOUR SALES THROUGH THE ROOF WE NOW EXPECT OTHERS TO TAKE OUT OTHER IDEOLOGICAL TERRITORY.

>> THE C.E.O. OF PAPA JOHN'S SAID "IN 2013 OUR BEST ESTIMATE

IS THAT THE OBAMACARE WILL COST ABOUT 11 TO 14 CENTS PER PIZZA."

>> Jon: WHAT THE... WHAT?

I'M GOING TO PAY AN EXTRA 11 TO 14 CENT SO THE GUY WHO MAKES MY PIZZA CAN GET ANTIBIOTICS TO

KEEP HIM FROM HANGING UP LUNG TISSUE ON TO MY PIZZA?

OUTRAGEOUS!

(AUDIENCE REACTS) SOMETHING TELLS ME I'M NOT ALONE.

>> IF YOU LIKE PIZZA GET READY TO COUGH UP MORE DOUGH.

>> WILL OBAMACARE MAKE YOUR PIZZA MORE EXPENSIVE?

>> YOU WILL SOON HAVE TO PAY MORE FOR YOUR PIZZA!

AND YOU HAVE PRESIDENT OBAMA TO THANK FOR THAT.

>> YOU KNOW WHAT?

I THINK WE CAN ABSORB THAT 11 TO 14 CENTS.

CONSIDERING YOU CAN'T TURN ON THE T.V. WITHOUT BEING OFFERED TWO PIZZAS FOR THE PRICE OF ONE

AND IF YOU CALL RIGHT NOW CRAZY BREAD, A TWO LITER SODA AND A THIRD PIZZA MADE OUT OF OREOS.

(LAUGHTER) SEEMS TO BE THE CHEAPEST FOOD PRODUCT ON THE PLANET.

OF COURSE, IT'S NOT ABOUT THE 11 CENTS, IT'S ABOUT A LARGE HERB ISSUE.

>> OBAMACARE IS DRIVING THE PRICE OF PIZZA THROUGH YOUR ROOF.

SOCIALISM SURBGS!

(LAUGHTER).

>> Jon: UNDER SOCIALISM HEALTH CARE WOULD BE THE RESPONSIBILITY OF THE STATE AND NOT PRIVATE

BUSINESSES WHICH I'M SURE YOUR COLLEAGUE BOB BECKEL WHO IS A LIBERAL WILL POINT OUT TO YOU

EXCEPT THAT... COME ON, MAN!

SHUT THE LID!

THAT IS NOT RIGHT!

(LAUGHTER) YOU ARE HYPNOTIZING HIM!

THAT IS NOT FAIR!

ALL RIGHT, FINE.

THAT IS A SNEAKY ARGUMENT MOVE.

I GUESS THE REPUBLICANS HAVE MADE THEIR POINT.

WE MUST END OBAMACARE TO SAVE OUR PIZZA.

JUST ONE THING, I KNOW THIS IS PROBABLY A STUPID QUESTION.

ARE THERE ANY OTHER FACTORS THAT COULD ALSO DRIVE UP THE COST OF PIZZA?

>> 64% OF THE U.S. IS NOW IN SOME FORM OF DROUGHT.

64%.

>> THERE'S FEAR THAT FOOD-- THINGS LIKE DAIRY, MEAT PRICES,

EVEN THE PRICE OF PIZZA COULD SKYROCKET.

>> Jon: OH, RIGHT, THIS SUMMER'S CROP-KILLING MILK SCORCHING DROUGHT OF BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS.

COME TO THINK OF IT THAT MIGHT ALSO BE AFFECTING THE PRICE OF PIZZA.

NOT TO MENTION THE FUTURE OF THE PLANET BUT LET'S FOCUS ON THE PIZZA.

SUMMER'S ALMOST OVER.

THAT WILL SOLVE THE HEAT WAVE,

RIGHT?

>> THERE IS A CONNECTION TO THESE EXTREME WEATHER EVENTS THAT WE'VE BEEN SEEING.

>> THEY ARE, IN FACT, A PRODUCT OF GLOBAL WARMING.

>> Jon: WHAT DO YOU KNOW NASA SCIENTIST?

(LAUGHTER) THAT'S JUST A SCIENTIFIC FACT.

ONE THAT HAPPENS TO BE CONFIRMED BY A RECENT STUDY FUNDED BY CLIMATE-DENYING PETROCHEMICAL BILLIONAIRES.

SO AS UPSET AS THE RIGHT GOT OVER OBAMACARE'S EFFECT ON THEIR

PIZZA I CAN'T IMAGINE HOW WIGGED OUT THEY'LL BE ABOUT GLOBAL WARMING.

>> OUR GOVERNMENT SPENDING OVER $10.6 MILLION OF YOUR TAXES ON

CLIMATE RESEARCH TO INCREASE ALL THIS SPENDING ON COMBATING GLOBAL WARMING ON THE HUNCH IT'S

MAN MADE.

>> TRYING TO REDESIGN THE AMERICAN ECONOMY AS WELL AS FOREIGN POLICY ON THE BASIS OF A

THEORY THAT PROVED TO BE GROUNDED IN LITTLE MORE THAN HYSTERIA.

>> THIS IS SURPRISING.

I HAVEN'T HEARD ON THE OTHER CHANNELS THAT SOME OF THE GLACIERS ARE GETTING BIGGER BUT

THAT'S WHY PEOPLE WATCH FOX.

(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: YEAH, THAT'S WHY THEY WATCH FOX.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) BECAUSE IT'S SO MUCH EASIER THAN LITERALLY STICKING UP YOUR HEAD

UP YOUR OWN ASS TO SHUT OUT REALITY.

SO PIZZA COSTS MORE BUT IN RETURN EVEN GETS HEALTH INSURANCE, OUTRAGEOUS!

BUT IF IT COSTS MORE BECAUSE HUMAN ACTIVITY IS BURNING OUR PLANET TO AN UNINHABITABLE HUSK,

OH, WHAT THE (BLEEP).

(LAUGHTER) RIGHT?

WE'RE SCREWED, WE'RE

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