C.N.I.: Cable News Investigators - Hoodie Threat

  • Aired:  03/26/12
  •  | Views: 118,782

Following the Trayvon Martin shooting, John Oliver and Wyatt Cenac report from Florida on why it is that only what black people wear turns scary. (6:20)

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.

WE ARE TALKING ABOUT THE TRAYVON MARTIN CASE.

FORTUNATELY AMONGST ALL THIS "INVESTIGATE THE SHOOTER" TRAP A VOICE OF REASON EMERGED.

>> I BELIEVE THAT GEORGE ZIMMERMAN, THE OVERZEALOUS NEIGHBORHOOD WATCH CAPTAIN

SHOULD BE INVESTIGATED TO THE FULLEST EXTENT OF THE LAW.

IF HE IS CRIMINALLY LIABLE, HE SHOULD BE PROSECUTED.

BUT I AM URGING THE PARENTS OF BLACK AND LATINO YOUNGSTER PARTICULARLY TO NOT LET THEIR

CHILDREN GO OUT WEARING HOODIES.

I THINK THE HOODIE IS AS MUCH RESPONSIBLE FOR TRAYVON MARTIN'S DEATH AS GEORGE ZIMMERMAN WAS.

>> Jon: HOW DARE YOU BOO.

.

THE HOODIE IS A DEATH TRAP.

IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN A DEATH TRAP.

SOMETIMES THE STRING CAN GET CAUGHT AND THEN PULL AND...

THE HOODIE HAS KILLED MORE PEOPLE THAN BOTULISM.

FOR MORE ON THIS TERRIBLE STORY WE HAVE FULL TEAM COVERAGE.

FIRST OUT TO FLORIDA.

JON OLIVER IN SANFORD.

JON, NICE TO SEE YOU.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) I SEE THAT YOU TOO IN

SOLIDARITY ARE WEARING A HOODIE.

>> ABSOLUTELY, JON.

ANY REPORTER WHO ISN'T WEARING A HOODIE RIGHT NOW IS A RACIST.

>> Jon: I ASSUME YOU'RE REFERRING TO ME.

I AM NOT WEARING A HOODIE.

>> YOU'RE NOT?

THEN I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO DO SOME SOUL SEARCHING AS TO WHETHER OR NOT I WANT TO WORK

FOR SUCH A COLOSSAL RACIST.

FOR ME, JON, I WILL KEEP WEARING MY SOLIDARITY HOODIE UNTIL TRAGIC ENS DENTS LIKE

THIS ONE ARE A THING OF THE PAST WHICH I HOPE WILL HAPPEN BEFORE TOMORROW BECAUSE

TOMORROW IT'S GOING TO BE HOT AS BULLS DOWN HERE.

>> Jon: WERB WE CAN APPRECIATE THAT, JON.

WE ALSO HAVE WYATT CENAC LIVE.

WYATT.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) I NOTICE, WYATT, YOU DO NOT

SEEM TO BE WEARING THE HOODIE.

>> OF COURSE I'M NOT.

I'M NOT (BEEP) CRAZY.

IT'S EASY FOR OLIVER TO ROCK A HOODIE.

HE'S WHITE.

>> Jon:.

>> IT'S TRUE, JON.

IT'S TRUE.

I AM INCREDIBLY WHITE.

>> THE LAST TIME ANYONE FELT THREATENED BY A PASTEY WHITE BRITISH GUY WAS 1776.

>> Jon: I CAN UNDERSTAND NOT WEARING THE HOODIE.

WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?

>> THIS IS MY PROPELLER BEANY.

>> Jon: WHY?

>> I'M IN FLORIDA, JON.

THIS IS THE LEAST THREATENING ITEM OF CLOTHING I OWN.

>> Jon: WHY THE GIANT LOLLIPOP?

>> THIS IS THE SAFEST ALTERNATIVE TO SKITTLES.

( APPLAUSE )

>> Jon: I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

>> REMEMBER, JON.

IT WASN'T JUST THE HOODIE THAT FRIGHTENED ZIMMERMAN.

IT WAS THE HOODIE COUPLED WITH THIS TERRIFYING CANDY.

>> Jon: I DON'T THINK SKITTLES ARE TERRIFYING WYATT.

>> NO, LISTEN TO THIS.

WHAT DOES THAT SOUND LIKE TO YOU?

>> Jon: I GUESS SKITTLES IT SOUNDS LIKE.

>> OR MAYBE A RATTLE SNAKE.

OR TWO RATTLE SNAKES OR A BAG OF RATTLE SNAKES.

WHO KNOWS.

ALL I KNOW IS THAT THESE RAINBOW COLORED PELLETS ARE RIGHT AT THE TOP OF THE "DO

NOT CARRY" LIST.

( APPLAUSE )

>> Jon: ARE YOU SAYING, WYATT,

ARE YOU SAYING GERALDO IS RIGHT TO AVOID INADVERTENTLY FRIGHTENING PEOPLE.

FROM NOW ON BLACK PEOPLE SHOULD WEAR PROPELLER BEANEES AND CARRY GIANT LOLLIPOPS.

>> FOR AS LONG AS THAT WORKS.

THE SHELF LIFE ON NON-THREATENING BLACK PEOPLE GARB IS PRETTY SHORT.

I'M WEARING THIS ON TV RIGHT NOW.

WE'RE JUST 48 HOURS AWAY FROM "HELLO, POLICE, THERE'S A BLACK GUY WITH HEAD BLADES.

I THINK HE'S HERE TO STEAL MY GRANDDAUGHTER." THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW,

YOU'RE BAILING ME OUT OF JAIL.

AGAIN.

>> Jon: WYATT, YOU KNOW I SAY CALL ME ANY TIME.

YOU KNOW THAT.

>> I APPRECIATE IT.

THE THING I DON'T GET IS WHY IS IT THAT ONLY WHAT BLACK PEOPLE WEAR TURNS SCARY.

YOU NEVER HEARD GERALDO SAYING DON'T LET YOUR TEEN WEAR COW BOY HATS AND CONFEDERATE FLAG

TANK TOPS BECAUSE IT SENDS A THREATENING MESSAGE.

>> Jon: I BET WHITE KIDS GETS TO EAT ALL KINDS OF CANDY.

>> DON'T GET ME STARTED ON A BLACK MAN WIELDING A CHARLESTON CHEW.

YOU DON'T THINK SOME PEOPLE WILL FIND BLACK PEOPLE FRIGHTENING WEARING SOMETHING.

HERE'S A PICTURE OF ME DRESSED ALL SCARY.

IF YOU'RE RIGHT.

FIX THIS.

WHY NOT LOSE SOME OF THAT HAIR.

PROVE I'M NOT HIDING SOMETHING IN THERE LIKE ZULU WARRIOR LICE OR SOMETHING.

DO YOU FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE.

>> Jon: I WOULD GIVE THAT GUY A BANK LOAN.

>> BUT A SMALL LOAN, RIGHT?

BECAUSE THAT LOOK IS NOT GETTING A ZERO DOWN 20-YEAR MORTGAGE.

YOU KNOW WHY?

>> Jon: THE HOODIE I GUESS.

>> OF COURSE THE HOODIE.

LET'S PUT ON A NICE BROOKS BROTHER SUIT.

TWO BUTTONS OR LESS.

DON'T WANT TO LOOK LIKE STEVE HARVEY.

MAYBE SOME GLASSES.

CLARK KENT ME UP A LITTLE BIT.

MAYBE THROW A BOOK IN MY HAND.

NO ONE IS THREATENED BY A NERD.

IN FACT LET'S NERD IT UP A LITTLE BIT MORE.

MUCH BETTER.

MUCH BETTER.

>> Jon: OH, (BEEP).

>> YEAH, SEE.

>> Jon: UNBELIEVABLE.

NATION OF ISLAM, WYATT, IS GOING TO SCARE A LOT OF PEOPLE.

>> WE DIDN'T LAND ON PLYMOUTH ROCK.

PLYMOUTH ROCKLANDED ON US.

LET ME BE CLEAR.

PEOPLE AREN'T SCARED OF THE LOOK.

THEY'RE SCARED OF WHO IS WEARING IT.

LOOK AT THAT SAME GET-UP ON JOHN OLIVER.

>> HE'S ACTUALLY RIGHT THOUGH,

JON.

LOOK AT ME.

I LOOK LIKE I'LL BE READY TO BE THE NEW SUBSTITUTE TEACHER ON HOGWARTS.

LOOK AT THAT.

>> Jon: WERE YOU WEARING THAT UNDERNEATH YOUR HOODIE?

>> JON, I WEAR THIS UNDER EVERYTHING THAT I WEAR.

THIS IS BASICALLY THE BRITISH VERSION OF NAKED.

DON'T LOOK AT ME.

>> Jon: WYATT CENAC AND JOHN

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