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July 28, 2015 - Tom Cruise

  • Episode: 20136
  • Views: 165,333

President Obama visits Ethiopia and Kenya, Hasan Minhaj and Jordan Klepper make Jon answer fans' questions, and Tom Cruise discusses "Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation." (21:29)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)♪♪

>> Jon: WELCOME TO THE DAILYSHOW!

MY NAME IS JON STEWART.

WE HAVE A HELL OF A PROGRAM FORYOU TONIGHT.

A GENTLEMAN BY THE NAME OF TOMCRUISE WILL BE JOINING US ON THE

PROGRAM TONIGHT BECAUSE SOMEPEOPLE NAMED CRUISE HAVE THE

BALLS TO COME DO THIS SHOW.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

SENATOR, OH, I'VE GOT TO STAYIN WASHINGTON AND DO BUSINESS.

BY THE WAY, PRESIDENT OBAMACOMING TO THE END OF HIS TERM.

AND WITH THAT COMES THE END OFTH AT JETTING AROUND ON THAT

SWEET GOVERNMENT PLANE OF HIS.

THAT'S RIGHT, PAL.

YOU SHOULD BE FYING COMMERCIALLIKE THE REST OF US.

HOPE YOU LIKE WATCHING "PAULBLART 2" ON A TINY SCREEN WHILE

WAITING FOR FLAVORLESS CHICKENCHUNKS AND YOU NEVER GET ANYWAY

BECAUSE A DRUNK GUY TOOK A DUMPON THE CART!

(LAUGHTER)

WHAT 'M SAYING IS, IT'S GOOD THEPRESIDENT IS MAKING SHOES OF AIR

FORCE ONE WHILE HE'S STILL GOTIT.

>> PRESIDENT OBAMA BECAME THEFIRST SITTING PRESIDENT OF THE

UNITED STATES TO VISIT ETHIOPIA.

HE TRAVELED FROM HIS FATHER'SHOMELAND, KENYA.

>> Jon: OH RIGHT, HIS FATHER'SHOMELAND!

HA HA!

HMM!

HIS FATHER'S HOMELAND, THE PLACEWHERE HIS FATHER WAS BORN!

WINK!

>> I SUSPECT SOME OF MYCRITICS BACK HOME ARE SUGGESTING

I'M BACK HERE TO LOOK FOR MYBIRTH CERTIFICATE.

(LAUGHTER)

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: WELL, THAT STOLE A LOTOF THE JOY OUT OF MY JOKE.

YOU HOST THE DAILY SHOW, OBAMA.HOW ABOUT THAT?

WHEN I LEAVE THIS SHOW, I'LLJUST PACK UP AND MOVE TO

SOME FARM IN NEW JERSEY --WHAT'S THAT?

OH, I'M I AM DOING THAT?

NEXT WEEK?

WOW!

THAT'S (BLEEP) UP.

WELL, GOOD THING YOU'RE HERE,OTHERWISE I WOULD HAVE JUST KEPT

COMING TO WORK.

INCIDENTALLY, MR. PRESIDENT, YOUWISH YOUR CRITICS BACK HOME WERE

STILL SPOUTING THAT BIRTHERNONSENSE.

THEY'VE MOVED ON TO YOUR IRANDEAL MAKES YOU HITLER.

NO WONDER YOU'RE ALL DOWN LIKE," HEY, REMEMBER I WAS BORN IN

KENYA? LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT."

(LAUGHTER)

PRESIDENT OBAMA RETURNSTOMORROW FROM A FIVE-DAY VISIT

TO KENYA AND ETHIOPIA, WHICHBEGAN WITH THE TRADITIONAL

PRESIDENTIAL SNUBBING OF THERELATIVES.

>> THE TRIP TO AFRICA ISPERFECT FOR PRESIDENT OBAMA,

WHOSE FATHER WAS BORN IN KENYA,BUT DUE TO SECURITY CONCERNS HE

WON'T BE ABLE TO VISIT THEVILLAGE.

>> I WILL NOT FEEL BAD.

HE HAS TO COME TO WORK, SO LETHIM WORK.

I CAN'T FEEL BAD.

HE HAS TO COME FOR HIS DUTY.

BUT SOME DAY HE WILL SURELYCOME.

HE'S A SON HERE AND I CANNOT BEANGERED BY HIM NOT COMING TO SEE

ME.

>> Jon: WOW.

I HAD NO IDEA OBAMA'S AFRICANGRANDMOTHER WAS JEWISH.

(LAUGHTER)

THAT WAS A LITTLE PASSIVEAGGRESSIVE FROM THE KENYON

GRANDMOTHER.

NO, I GET IT!

HE'S A PRESIDENT, HE HASIMPORTANT PEOPLE TO MEET.

DOESN'T BOTHER ME AT ALL.

IF I REALLY WANTED TO SEE HIM,HE CAN COME TO MY FUNERAL, I'LL

DIE ... MR. BIG SHOT AMERICANPRESIDENT!

EHHH!

♪ IF I WERE A ...

THE PRESIDENT'S EAST AFRICAPRESENTED MANY SIGHTS FOR THE

PRESIDENT, BOTH UNFORGETTABLEAND SOMEWHAT FORGETTABLE.

>> HE WENT TO VISIT LUCY,PROBABLY ONE TO HAVE THE MOST

FAMOUS FOSSIL IN THE WORLD, MORETHAN 3 MILLION YEARS OLD.

>> THE PRESIDENT TOURED A FOODPROCESSING FACILITY WHERE HE MET

A FARMER WHO ARE INCREASEDOUTPUT OF CORN ON HER FARM BY

THREE TIMES.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: LOOK AT THE PRESIDENT'SFACE WHEN HE'S LOOKING AT THE

COMMON ANCESTOR OF ALL MANKIND.

AND LOOK AT HIS CORN FACE.

THAT IS A GUY THAT'S, LIKE, YOUKNOW WE HAVE CORN, RIGHT?

WE HAVE (BLEEP)-LOADS OF CORN.

LET'S FOCUS ON THE NON-CORNSIGHTS.

>> EVERY SINGLE PERSON HERE, 7BILLION INDIVUDALS, INCLUDING

DONALD TRUMP, CAN COME FROM THISANCESTRY.

>> Jon: WOW!

WOW!

IT'S ONE THING FOR THE PRESDEINTTO PREEMPT MY JOKES BUT I'M NOT

GOING TO LET AN ETHIOPIANANTHROPOLOGIST JUMP IN ON THE

TRUMP ACTION!

IT'S FASCINATING ACROSS THEWORLD'S CULTURES, THE TWO THINGS

WE SHARE SEEM TO BE MUSIC ANDTRUMP JOKES.

I QUIBBLE WITH THEANTHROPOLOGIST BECAUSE WHILE

MOST DESCENDENTS ARE FROM LUCY,DONALD TRUMP DESCENDED FROM AN

ANCIENT FORM KNOWN ASTRI-HAIRATOPS.

(LAUGHTER)

THE NAME TRANSLATES LITEARLLY ASTHE THREE-WIVED EGO LIZARD.

BUT OBVIOUSLY OBAMA'S TRIPWAS NOT ALL BONES AND CORN.

BY THE WAY, DEL MONTE'S LEASTPOPULAR PRODUCT.

THERE WERE ALSO -- HAVE YOU HADTHEIR BONES AND CORN?

I CAN'T RECOMMEND IT LESS.

THERE WERE ALSO SERIOUS ISSUESFOR THE PRESIDENT TO ADDRESS.

>> HE'S NOT SHYING AWAY FROM THEISSUE OF HUMAN RIGHTS.

>> OBAMA GOING HEAD TO HEADESSENTIALLY WITH PRESIDENT

UHURU KENYATTA ON GAY RIGHTSISSUES.

>> THE IDEA IS THEY ARE GOING TOBE TREATED DIFFERENTLY OR ABUSED

BECAUSE OF WHO THEY LOVE ISWRONG.

>> Jon: I MEAN, WHAT KIND OFBACKWARD, INTOLERANT COUNTRY

WOULD TREAT PEOPLE DIFFERENTLYJUST BECAUSE THEY'RE GAY?

THAT IS SO ONE MONTH AGO!

(LAUGHTER)

NOW, NOT ALL THE PRESIDENT'SCRITIQUES WERE PHRASED QUITE AS

ELOQUENTLY.

>> THE PRESIDENT ALSO SAID KENYAAND OTHER AFRICAN NATIONS STILL

CLING TO TRADITIONS THATMARGINALIZE WOMEN WITH AND

DISCOURAGE THEM FROM WORKING.

>> THAT'S STUPID!

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: YOU'RE IDIOTS!

KNOCK, KNOCK.

WHO'S THERE?

YOU DON'T KNOW.

YOU'RE STUPID.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT THAT'S OUR PRESIDENT,BECAUSE THAT'S AMERICA.

WE ARE A BEACON OF EQUALITY ANDFREEDOM AND WE SPREAD THAT

MESSAGE NO MATTER WHERE WE ARE,NO MATTER HOW UNCOMFORTABLE IT

MAY MAKE OUR LESS PROGRESSIVEHOSTS.

>> PRESIDENT OBAMA ARRIVED INSAUDI ARABIA TODAY.

>> I THOUGHT IT WAS VERYIMPORTANT TO COME TO THE PLACE

WHERE ISLAM BEGAN AND TO SEE HISMAJEST'YS COUNCIL.

>> THEY DID NOT DISCUSS SAUDIHUMAN RIGHTS ABUSES.

>> Jon: OH -- WELL LET THAT BE ALESSON TO AFRICA.

YOU WANT TO (BLEEP) PEOPLE, YOUNEED TO MOVE US UP FIRST.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK!

SO, OVER THE PAST COUPLE OFWEEKS, WE HAVE BEEN DRINKING

COLD SYRUP BEFORE THE SHOW.

I'M SORRY, WE HAVE BEENENCOURAGING YOU TO SEND

QUESTIONS YOU ALWAYS WANTED TOASK.

I HAVEN'T BEEN DRINKING NYQUILBEFORE THE SHOW.

(LAUGHTER)

ANYWAY, WE WANTED YOU TO SENDQUESTIONS YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO

ASK VIA TWITTER.

TONIGHT, I ANSWER THOSEQUESTIONS IN THE SEGMENT WE

CALL --

HEY!

IT'S GOING TO BE -- UH, I'MSORRY, THOUGHT WE WERE DOING THE

ROUND TABLE.

>> HAVE A SEAT, JON.

>> Jon: SURE, WHAT'S THISABOUT?

>> PEOPLE WANT ANSWERS, STEWART!

>> Jon: I KNOW.

HAPPY TO GIVE THEM.

>> YEAH, PROVE IT!

@BENEFITSBABE WANTS TO KNOWWHO WAS YOUR FAVORITE GUEST OF

ALL TIME?

>> Jon: JIMMY CARTER,PRESIDENT JIMMY CARTER BECAUSE

USUALLY HE'S DRUNK AND RIGHTAFTERWARDS HE'S LIKE, "CAN WE GO

LOOK FOR WHORES?"

(LAUGHTER)

>> YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY, DON'TYOU, MR. CHUCKLES?

>> YOU KNOW, JORDAN. I DIDN'TWANT TO DO THIS, BUT I HAVE TO!

>> Jon: JESUS! WHAT ARE YOUDOING?

OH, DON'T -- DON'T DO THAT.

NO, NO, NOT THE KNIFE AND FORKS,WHAT IS THAT DE NINO'S?

HASAN, NO, FINE, MY FAVORITEGUESTS ARE MY FRIENDS.

LEARY, LOUIS, COLIN QUINN.

I GET TO NOT WORK AND (BLEEP)AROUND WITH THEM FOR FIVE

MIUNTES.

IT'S AN HONOR TO SIT ACROSS FROMPEOPLE ALSO, LIKE MALALA,

DESMOND TUTU, JIMMY CARTER.

JUST OUT THE CUTLERY DOWN, JUSTEAT IT WITH YOUR HANDS.

>> ALL RIGHT, SEE. WAS SO HARD,HUH?

>> Jon: ... YOU JUST SPIT ITOUT.

>> CAN WE FOCUS, STEWART?

CAN WE FOCUS?

LET ME HIM DIGEST IT HOWEVER HEWANTS.

>> Jon: IT IS STILL PIZZA!

TWITTER WANTS TO KNOW, NOW --

@LIFEISDESIRE ASKS WHAT ISWRITTEN ON THE BLUE PAPERS

YOU SCRIBBLED ON.

>> I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOWTHAT ONE.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: I HAVE BEEN WRITINGA NOVEL ONE SENTENCE A DAY FOR

16 YEARS ABOUT THE STRUGGLES OFA FEMALE BLACKSMITH WORKING IN A

MALE-DOMINATED PROFESSION.

>> HE'S DOING A JOKE!

IF I WANTED JOKES, I WOULDHAVE ASKED SOMEONE FUNNIER.

>> Jon: THAT HURTS. THAT'S GONNASTING A LITTLE.

>> GOD FORGIVE ME FOR WHAT I AMABOUT TO DO, STEWART.

>> Jon: WHAT ARE YOU GOING TODO?

>> FRANK --

>> Jon: NO!

NO!

NO!

COME ON!

NO!

NO!

DON'T DO IT!

I'M SORRY I'LL TALK.

TURN IT OFF! TURN IT OFF!

I CAN'T WATCH ANYMORE!

I'M A TERRIBLE ACTOR!

I CAN'T WATCH ANYMORE!

NEITHER CAN PEOPLE THAT WERESUPPOSED TO PAY MONEY.

>> WAS THAT YOUR ATTEMPT TO LOOKDESPERATE AND SAD?

>> YOU ARE TERRIBLE!

>> Jon: I CAN'T ACT!

THE BLUE PAPERS ARE SCRIPTS.

I CAN'T SMOKE ANYMORE SO ISCRIBBLE.

I DOODLE THE SAME CARTOONS OVERAND OVER AGAIN, THAT'S WHAT I

DO.

>> I WANNA SEE THAT CARTOON SOBAD. I WANNA SEE THAT.

SHOW ME THAT CARTOON.

>> Jon: SO WHAT I NORMALLY DOIS DRAW A ROUND-HEADED DRUNK GUY

LIKE THAT... OR I DRAW ME...WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE.

(LAUGHTER)

THAT'S A JEW-FRO.

>> THAT'S PRETTY GOOD.

I'M NOT GONNA LIE, THAT'S PRETTYGOOD.

>> BUT @SAMPUTSIMPLY WANTS TOKNOW IS THERE AN ALGORITHM FOR

WHAT CITIES GO ON THE GLOBETICKER EVERY SHOW?

>> Jon: WHAT? THERE'S NOALGORITHM, I DON'T KNOW WHAT --

>> UH, DON'T MAKE US DO THIS,STEWART.

WE HAVE A GUITAR, TERRIBLEVOICES AND MAKING UP OUR OWN

LYRICS TO "BORN TO RUN."

♪ (HASAN MINHAJ SINGING) I AMBRUCE SPRINGSTREEN. ♪

♪ I WAS BORN TO SUCK, BABY I WASBORN TO RUN. ♪

>> Jon: OUR DIRECTOR, CHUCKO'NEIL!

HE CHOOSES THE CITIES BASED ON ATHEME LIKE PLACES WITH FAMOUS

ZOOS OR COUNTRIES IN THE WORLDCUP SEMI-FINALS.

WE THINK OF IT AS A FUN GAME THEVIEWERS CAN PLAY AT HOME.

I'M SORRY, THAT'S ALL.

>> THAT'S FINE, THAT'S FINE.

BUT ONE LAST THING -- @L99BLOODWANTS TO KNOW: MARRY, SHAG OR

KILL LARRY WILMORE, JOHN OLIVER,STEPHEN COLBERT.

>> Jon: LOOK, THESE ARE GUYS AREMY FRIENDS. I DON'T WANNA DRIVE

A WEDGE BETWEEN US SAYING WHICHONE OF THEM I'D MARRY, (BLEEP)

OR KILLS, THAT'S NOT -- SOMETHINGS ARE BETTER LEFT UNSAID.

LET'S NOT WORRY ABOUT THIS --WHAT IS THAT?

>> YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS.

YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS, STEWART.

>> Jon: I THINK THAT'S ANARBY'S ENEMA?

>> DAMN RIGHT, THAT'S EXACTLYWHAT IT IS.

AND IF YOU DON'T START TALKING,WE'RE GOING TO MAKE YOU EAT IT

INSTEAD!

OPEN UP THAT ASKHOLE.

>> Jon: FINE! I'D (BLEEP) EVERYONE OF THEM!

EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM INEVERY SINGLE POISITION IN EVERY

ROOM IN THE HOUSE!

AND THEN I WOULD MAKE THEMBREAKFAST IN THE MORNING AND --

>> HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!

>> WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!

(ALL TALKING OVER ONE ANOTHER)

>> Jon: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK!

MY GUEST TONIGHT HAS A NEW MOVIEOUT CALLED "MISSION IMPOSSIBLE -

ROGUE NATION."

>> OPEN THE DOOR WHEN I TELLYOU!

♪♪

I'M ON THE PLANE, OPEN THE DOOR!

>> HOW'D YOU GET IN THE PLANE?

>> NO ON THE PLANE, I'M ON THEPLANE.

OPEN THE DOOR!

OPEN THE DOOR!

>> YEAH, OKAY, OKAY, OKAY!

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: PLEASE WELCOME BACK TOTHE SHOW, TOM CRUISE!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)♪♪

>> Jon: PLEASE!

PLEASE!

>> THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: I'M GOING TO LET THEMGET IT OUT.

THAT'S, LIKE, 30 SECONDS INTOTHE MOVIE.

THAT IS THE LEVEL OF ACTION THATWE'VE SEE IN THIS MOVIE, BUT

THAT'S LIKE 30 SECONDS IN.

>> IT'S RIGHT IN, 30 SECONDS.

>> Jon: HERE'S WHAT I LEARNEDFROM WATCHING THAT, THAT'S YOUR

REAL HAIR.

(LAUGHTER)

YOU CAN'T -- YOU'RESTRAPPED TO THAT ACTUAL PLANE,

IT'S TAKING OFF.

>> TAKING OFF, IT'S LIVE.

>> Jon: YOU CAN'T (BLEEP) THAT.

IF THAT WERE ME, YOU WOULD SEE ANICE LITTLE PATCH.

EVERYBODY WOULD BE, LIKE, AN OLDMAN LIKE THAT CAN'T HOLD ON TO

THE PLANE.

YOU CAN HOLD ON TO THE PLANE.

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT TOSEE?

HERE'S WHAT I WANT TO SEE.

>> WHAT DO YOU WANT TO SEE?

>> Jon: REMEMBER YEARNING COMECRUISE, VULNERABLE TOM CRUISE,

"YOU COMPLETE ME" TOM CRUISE?

>> YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT GUY.

>> Jon: WHERE IS THAT GUY?

NOW YOU'RE HANGING ON TO PLANESAND SHOOTING ALIENS.

>> THAT'S "MISSION."

THAT'S MISSION... OH, AND "EDGEOF TOMORROW."

HE WAS PRETTY VULERNABLE.

>> Jon: HE? YOU. YOU WERE IN IT!

>> HE WAS A COWARD, TOTAL COWARDIN "EDGE OF TOMOROW."

>> Jon: THAT WAS SUCH A GOODMOVIE. YOU KNOW I'VE SEEN THAT

MOVIE LIKE TEN TIMES.

>> HAVE YOU REALLY?

>> Jon: YEAH, THAT'S ONE OF MYSON'S FAVORITE MOVIES.

ALL YOU DO IN BLOW (BLEEP) UP,HE LOVES IT.

>> AND EMILY BLUNT. SHE'SAMAZING.

>> Jon: IS THAT A ONE-HANDEDPUSHUP OR IS SHE STRAPPED TO

SOMETHING?

>> SHE'S DOING ONE-HANDEDPUSHUPS.

>> Jon: THAT IS SERIOUSBUSINESS.

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE?

BECAUSE A LOT OF THIS -- I'M NOTGIVING IT AWAY -- YOU'RE

SHIRTLESS IN SOME OF THIS, ANDYOU AND I --

(CHEERING)

THANK YOU.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: YOU AND I ARE ABOUTTHE SAME AGE.

>> I'M 53.

>> Jon: YOU'RE OLDER THAN ME.

(LAUGHTER)

AND I DON'T TAKE OFF MYSHIRT EVEN TO SHOWER.

(LAUGHTER)

LITERALLY, NOW, I DID THAT --

THE LAST TIME I DID THAT, BOTHMY NIPPLES IN UNISON WENT, PUT

IT BACK ON.

(LAUGHTER)

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE?

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR A GUYOUR AGE TO GET, LIKE -- HOW MANY

HOURS DO YOU HAVE TO PUT IN ADAY?

>> IT DEPENDS.

FOR MISSION MOVIES, I'M SPENDINGMONTHS TRAINING FOR THE

DIFFERENT SEQUENCES.

>> Jon: GUY LIKE ME, BALLPARKFIGURE.

(LAUGHTER)

BECAUSE I'M GOING TO HAVESOME TIME ON MY HANDS.

LET'S SEE I'M NOT DOING AMISSION THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE.

LET'S SAY I'M DOING A MISSIONTHAT'S INTERMEDIATE.

INTERMEDIATE TO BEGINNER.

WHAT WOULD I NEED TO DO.

>> HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU WANT TOPUT IN?

HOW MANY YEARS?

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: I DON'T WANT TO PUT INANY TIME, BUT I DON'T WANT TO

HUMILIATE MYSELF AT THE POOL.

SO DO YOU HAVE TO CHANGE YOURDIET?

DO YOU HAVE TO DO --

>> YEAH, I MEAN, YOU KNOW,YOU'VE GOT TO LOOK AT YOUR DIET,

YES, THAT WOULD BE A GOOD START.

>> Jon: YOU DON'T REMEMBER --

>> SO YOU START OUT WITH THEWALK.

>> Jon: SO YOU START OUT WITH AWALK.

MY WIFE AND I ARE DOING -- YOUEVER HEARD OF THAT THING COUCH

TO 5K?

>> NO.

>> Jon: IT'S AN APP.

>> REALLY?

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: YEAH, YOU GET IT ON YOURPHONE AND A LADY TELLS YOU WHEN

TO RUN AND WHEN TO WALK.

>> GET OFF YOUR ASS?

>> Jon: SHE'S NOT RUDE LIKETHAT.

SHE'S VERY ENCOURAGING -- "GOODRUN."

>> VALIDATING, ENOURAGING ANDVALIDATION.

>> Jon: VERY ENCOURAGING.

I'M AT THE POINT NOW WHERE SHEDOESN'T MAKE ME DO IT FOR MORE

THAN 20 SECONDS AT A TIME.

>> THAT'S GOOD!

START OUT WITH THAT.

>> Jon: ACTUALLY, I THINK IHEARD HER SIGH THE OTHER DAY ON

THE APP.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT YOU'RE HAVING A BALL, RIGHT?

YOU SEEM LIKE YOU'RE HAVING ABALL.

>> I LOVE MAKING THESE MOVIES.

"MISSION" IS THE FIRST FILM IPRODUCED.

>> Jon: I THOUGHT YOU HAD BEENPRODUCING A TON OF STUFF BECAUSE

THAT WASN'T THAT LONG AGO.

>> THE FIRST MISSION, THAT WASABOUT 20 YEARS AGO.

20 YEARS AGO, I STARTED IT,AND IT WAS THE VERY FIRST FILM

THAT I EVER PRODUCED AND I WENTOVER THERE WITH SHERRI LANSING

AND STANLEY JAFFE OF PARAMOUNTAND THEY ASKED ME TO PRODUCE,

AND THAT'S THE FIRST FILM IPRODUCED.

>> Jon: AND THAT WAS --I THINK IT BLEW EVERYBODY'S

MIND.

>> I KNOW, IT GOES LIKE THAT.

>> Jon: THAT'S CRAZY, AND THEREHAVE BEEN FIVE OF THEM?

>> THIS IS THE FIFTH ONE.

PRETTY AMAZING.

IT'S THE ONE I THOUGHT, IF ICOULD KEEP MAKING THESE KINDS OF

MOVIES, YOU KNOW --

>> Jon: I THINK YOU--

IF I MAY, AND I DON'T MEAN TO BEPRESUMPTUOUS, I THINK YOU CAN.

>> YEAH.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: IT'S NOT LIKE "DEATHTO SMOOCHY" WHEN THEY'RE, LIKE,

ONE AND DONE!

YOU CAN GET IN THERE AND KNOCKAROUND A FEW MORE.

DO YOU HAVE PLANS TO DO ANOTHERONE?

>> YEAH, WE'RE PROBABLY GOING TOSHOOT IT NEXT SUMMER.

RIGHT NOW THE SHOOTING A DOUGLIMAN FILM --

>> Jon: OH, YEAH. HE'S AWESOME.

HE DID "EDGE OF TOMORROW."

HOW ABOUT THIS ONE, THEY DROPYOU IN A VOLCANO?

>> THAT'S A GOOD IDEA, THAT'S AGOOD IDEA.

A LITTLE REPELLING IN VOLCANO.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO ICELAND?

>> Jon: I'M A PRODUCER!

I HAVE NEVER BEEN ICELAND, HAVEYOU?

>> AMAZING.>> Jon: REALLY?

>> YEAH, I WENT RAPPELING INA VOLCANO.

>> Jon: THAT IS TOTALLY WHAT IWOULD DO.

>> BRING THE KIDS, THEY'REGONNA LOVE IT.

>> Jon: NOT ONE WORD IN THATSENTENCE WOULD I DO: REPELLING,

VOLCANO, ICELAND -- MAYBE THECONJUNCTION.

I CAN GO WITH, BUT THAT'S IT.

"MISSION IMPOSSIBLE - ROGUENATION," IN THEATERS FRIDAY!

TOM CRUISE!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: BEFORE WE GO, LET'SCHECK IN WITH OUR GOOD FRIEND

WILMORE OF THE NIGHTLY SHOW!

HEY, LARRY!

>> HEY, JON. HOWS IT GOING?

GOT ANY BIG PLANS FOR YOURLAST TWO WEEKS?

>> Jon: WELL, YOU KNOW -- YES!

YOU GOT A GREAT LAST ONEPLANNED?

>> I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THESHOW, JON -- OH.

HAVE YOU NOT HEARD?

>> Jon: WHAT?

I WAS WITH YOUR DOCTOR LASTNIGHT AND -- WELL, YOU KNOW,

ENJOY THESE TWO WEEKS, BUDDY!

HAVE FUN!

>> Jon: LARRY, HOW ODD THAT YOUWERE A, TALKING TO MY DOCTOR,

AND, B, HE WAS SHARING MYPRIVATE AND APPARENTLY

CATASTROPHIC MEDICALINFORMATION.

SEEMS WEIRD.

>> AS LONG AS WE REMEMBER YOU,JON.

IT'S LIKE YOU WON'T REALLY BEDYING.

>> Jon: I'M NOT DYING!

I'M JUST LEAVING THE SHOW!

>> WHATEVER YOU'VE GOT TO TELLYOURSELF, MAN.

>> Jon: ALL RIGHT, LARRYWILMORE!

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

THAT'S OUR SHOW --

HERE IT IS, YOUR MOMENT OF ZEN.

>> LOOKING AT EARLY PICTURES OFHER STEP-GRANDSON'S FAMILY, SHE

HAD AN OBSERVATION.

>> HE'S LOOKING OLD.

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