May 9, 2012 - John R. Hall

  • Episode: 17102
  • (0)

President Obama voices his support for same-sex marriage, Kristen Schaal shares her voting history, and John Hall critiques Jon's Queen Elizabeth II impression.

Captioning sponsored by

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( THEME SONG PLAYING )

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

>> Jon: HEY, WELCOME TO "THE DAILY SHOW"!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) MY NAME IS JON STEWART.

GOT A GOOD ONE TONIGHT.

WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A VISIT.

OUR GUEST IS JOHN HALL.

HE IS THE DEAN OF WESTMINSTER ABBEY AND I CANNOT WAIT TO FIND OUT WHETHER HE IS A HUFFLEPUFF

OR GRIFFIN DORR.

(LAUGHTER) YESTERDAY ON THIS PROGRAM... FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO WATCHED, I

DON'T WATCH THIS PROGRAM,

REASONABLE PEOPLE CAN DISAGREE.

WE E MAY HAVE INSINUATED PRESIDENT OBAMA WAS SOMEHOW BEING DISINGENUOUS IN GIVING IN

TO HIS MOST BASE POLITICAL CALCULATIONS BY NOT JUST SAYING HE FAVORS SAME-SEX MARRIAGE AND

EQUAL RIGHTS FOR ALL AMERICANS.

THAT HIS POSITION IS EVOLVING IS WEAK TEA WHAT WE DIDN'T KNOW AT

THE TIME IS THAT HE HAD PLANNED THIS: .

>> IT'S IMPORTANT FOR ME TO GO AHEAD AND AFFIRM THAT I THINK

SAME-SEX COUPLES SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET MARRIED.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

>> Jon: THERE YOU HAVE IT.

THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES IS GAY.

(LAUGHTER) FRIENDLY.

GAY FRIENDLY.

(LAUGHTER) DAMN YOU, ELLIPSIS.

(LAUGHTER) AND I THINK WE ALL KNOW WHO DESERVES THE CREDIT FOR THIS.

>> I'LL TAKE A LOT OF CREDIT.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: SO EXCITING POSITIVE NEWS FOR EQUAL RIGHTS FOR ALL CITIZENS, A SYMBOLIC VICTORY

THAT CAN IN NO WAY BE DAMPENED BY THE CODIFYING OF BIGOTRY IN-- LET'S SAY THE STATE WHERE THE

DEMOCRATS ARE GOING TO BE HOLDING THEIR CONVENTION.

(AUDIENCE REACTS)

>> NORTH CAROLINA VOTERS PASSED A STRICT AMENDMENT TO THEIR CONSTITUTION THAT BANS SAME-SEX MARRIAGES.

>> Jon: CONGRATULATIONS, NORTH CAROLINA, FOR A MOMENT I WAS FEELING A BRIEF GLIMPSE OF WHAT

I GUESS DOCTORS WOULD CALL HAPPINESS AND A FULL HEART AND I APPRECIATE YOU ENDING THAT.

BY THE WAY, IN YOUR ZEAL TO PROTECT YOURSELVES FROM THE GAY MENACE THERE ISN'T ANY CHANCE

YOU MAY HAVE, I DON'T KNOW,

CREATED SOME COLLATERAL DAMAGE PHO *PBS THE HETEROS.

>> IT ALSO BANS CIVIL UNIONS AND DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIPS-- AND GET

THIS, NOT JUST FOR GAY COUPLES BUT STRAIGHT COUPLES IN THE STATE, TOO.

>> OOPS!

(LAUGHTER) WE (BLEEP)ED UP!

YOU KNOW WHAT THOUGH, ACTUALLY.

THAT'S A STEP TOWARDS EQUALITY SINCE MANY OPPOSITE-SEX COUPLES WILL NOW ENJOY THE SAME LACK OF

RIGHTS SAME-SEX COUPLES HAVE ALWAYS NEVER HAD.

(LAUGHTER) (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) ONE OF THE MEASURES CHIEF BACKERS WAS NORTH CAROLINA "VOTE

FOR MARRIAGE" WHICH ARGUED "WHEN MARRIAGE CEASES TO HAVE ITS HISTORIC MEANING AND

UNDERSTANDING OVER TIME FEWER AND FEWER PEOPLE WILL MARRY." YES, OF COURSE, IT WILL BE TOO

GAY NOW.

(LAUGHTER) LIKE ROLLERBLADING.

(LAUGHTER) BUT, YES, LET'S EXAMINE MARRIAGE'S HISTORIC MEANING.

IT IS IMPORTANT TO MAINTAIN MARRIAGE'S HISTORIC MEANING.

WHAT IS MARRIAGE'S HISTORIC MEANING, BY THE WAY?

LET ME SEE IF I CAN LOOK THAT UP HERE.

(LAUGHTER) OKAY.

LET ME SEE.

MARRIAGE ORIGINATED AS A SOCIAL CONSTRUCT THAT ALLOWED FAMILY PATRIARCHS TO FACILITATE THE

TRANSFER OF CHATTEL PROPERTY SUCH AS LIVESTOCK OR DAUGHTERS.

(LAUGHTER) THROUGH LAWFUL CONTRACTS AND THEN AFTERWARDS HAVING A PARTY.

OKAY.

COULD ANYONE FIGHTING FOR THIS MARRIAGE BAN FOR SAME-SEX COUPLES DEFINE IN THE THE MOST

IGNORANT WAY POSSIBLE?

>> IF MARRIAGE IS RADICALLY REDEFINED AS BEING JUST A WAY OF AFFIRMING PRIVATE FEELINGS OF

LOVING ATTRACTION THEN EQUALITY WILL REQUIRE ALLOWING PEOPLE WHO LOVE DOGS TO MARRY DOGS AND

PEOPLE WHO LOVE ICE CREAM TO MARRY ICE CREAM.

>> Jon: YES, THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT.

YOU KNOW, I REALIZE NOW THAT'S NOT A BALD HEAD, THAT'S A SOLAR

PANEL FOR A DUMB ASS MACHINE.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) BY THE WAY, I JUST WANT TO ADD VERY QUICKLY... (BARKING)

DOES YOUR WIFE KNOW THAT YOU CAN'T SEE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE CONSENSUAL LOVE THAT LEADS

TO MATRIMONY AND THE ENJOYMENT YOU GET FROM A DAIRY QUEEN BLIZZARD?

(LAUGHTER) NOBODY WOULD MISTAKE THESE TWO THINGS.

WELL, ONE GUY MIGHT MISTAKE THEM.

>> I LOVE FRUIT SALAD!

>> THEN WHY DON'T YOU MARRY IT?

>> ALL RIGHT, THEN.

I WILL!

>> DO YOU, PEE-WEE HERMAN TAKE THIS FRUIT SALAD TO BE YOUR LAWFULLY WEDDED W

BUT AGAIN IT'S THIS KIND OF RESULT IN NORTH CAROLINA THAT SHOWS WHAT PRESIDENT OBAMA DID

TODAY WAS A BOLD MOVE, PUTTING PRINCIPLE OVER POLITICS OR TO PUT THAT ANOTHER WAY...

>> JUST HOW UNPOPULAR IS PRESIDENT OBAMA IN SOME PARTS OF THE UNITED STATES?

>> Jon: OH, I KNOW THIS GAME!

IT'S THAT NEW SHOW "YO CNN SNAPS." (LAUGHTER) OKAY, I WANT TO PLAY, LIKE, OH,

MAN, THE PRESIDENT IS SO UNPOPULAR HE'S LOOKING FORWARD TO THE DEBATES SO SOMEONE WILL

TALK TO HIM.

(LAUGHTER) OBAMA IS SO UNPOPULAR KENYA NOW SAYS HE WAS BORN IN GHANA.

(LAUGHTER) HE'S SO UNPOPULAR HIS BEN & JERRY'S FLAVOR IS IM-PEACH.

(AUDIENCE REACTS) BUT YOU DID ENJOY THE GHANA ONE.

(LAUGHTER) ALL RIGHT, CNN, YOUR TURN.

OBAMA IS SO UNPOPULAR...

>> LET'S LOOK AT WEST VIRGINIA.

THE PRESIDENT LOST ROUGHLY 40% OF THE VOTE IN LAST NIGHT'S DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY.

HE WON OVERALL BUT LOST TO AN INMATE.

THE GUY'S NAME IS KEITH JUDD SERVING TIME AT THE BEAUMONT FEDERAL CORRECTIONAL INSTITUTE

IN TEXAS.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: THAT IS (BLEEP)ED UP!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) WOW!

WOW!

I GUESS WEST VIRGINIA IS ONE OF THEM PRIMARIES WHERE REPUBLICANS CAN VOTE IN THE DEMOCRATS'

PRIMARY JUST TOES ME WITH THEM AND THEN THEY... WOW!

ONLY DEMOCRATS AND INDEPENDENTS?

THAT IS (BLEEP)ED UP!

(LAUGHTER) PLEASE TELL ME THAT THE GUY WHO GOT 40% OF THE VOTE IS WEARING A

COON SKIN CAP BECAUSE...

(LAUGHTER).

OR IS BEING ATTACKED BY A FERRET BECAUSE...

(LAUGHTER).

OH, BOY.

ANYONE ELSE VOTE YESTERDAY?

>> IN INDIANA WE SAW THE LONGEST-SERVING REPUBLICAN IN THE SENATE LOSE HIS SEAT AFTER

36 YEARS.

SENATOR DICK LUGAR IS OUT,

LOSING TO A CANDIDATE BACKED BY THE TEA PARTY, INDIANA STATE TREASURER RICHARD MOURDOCK.

>> Jon: NO, NOT DICK LUGAR!

NOT OUR MOST PORN-NAMED SENATOR!

(LAUGHTER) OTHER THAN SENATOR JOHNNY GIANTBALLS.

(LAUGHTER) AFTER ONLY 36 YEARS IN THE SENATE?

HE WAS ONLY 12 YEARS AWAY FROM GETTING SOMETHING DONE.

(LAUGHTER) WELL, CONGRESS HAS BEEN SOMETHAT THAT TPHAPBT.

MAYBE THIS NEW GUY WILL GET THINGS DONE.

>> I HAVE A MIND-SET THAT SAYS BIPARTISANSHIP OUGHT TO CONSIST EMOCRATS COMING TO THED

REPUBLICAN POINT OF VIEW.

>> Jon: WOW, COMPLETELY REDEFINING THE MEANING OF WORDS.

(LAUGHT

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.

SO WE TALKED ABOUT THE PRESIDENT EARLIER.

AND ALONG WITH THE SAME-SEX MARRIAGE ANNOUNCEMENT YOU MAY HAVE HEARD PRESIDENT OBAMA HAS A

NEW LADY IN HIS LIFE AND SHE...

I SHOULD EXPLAIN.

IT'S CALL "THE LIFE OF JULIA" AND IT'S A NEW WEB AD EXPLAINING

HOW THE AVERAGE AMERICAN WOMAN MIGHT BENEFIT FROM OBAMA'S POLICIES.

FROM SOME AFFORDABLE STUDENT LOANS TO GOVERNMENT HEALTH INSURANCE TO OTHER... OH, MY GOD!

LOOK OUT FOR THE BUS!

OH!

OH!

(LAUGHTER) IT'S JUST ALL SO REALISTIC.

(LAUGHTER) THE WHOLE SOMETHING A LITTLE SIMPLISTIC BUT NOTHING WORTH GETTING TOO WORKED UP OVER.

AND WATCH EVERYBODY GET REAL WORKED UP.

>> IT'S SEXIST TO ASSUME WOMEN CANNOT MAKE IT ON THEIR OWN.

>> WHEN WE SAY KRAEUD TOLL GRAVE GOVERNMENT NANNY STATE THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT WE MEAN.

>> WHAT DOES IT SAY ABOUT A PRESIDENT'S POLICIES WHEN HE HAS TO USE A CARTOON CHARACTER

RATHER THAN REAL PEOPLE TO JUSTIFY HIS RECORDS.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: THAT STRATEGY ALMOST WORKED FOR JOHN McCAIN.

(AUDIENCE REACTS) (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) DID YOU IRON THAT FLAG BEHIND

YOU, BECAUSE IT'S WRINKLE-FREE.

TO HELP US UNDERSTAND THIS CARTOON KERFUFFLE, WE TURN TO

"THE DAILY SHOW" SENIOR WOMEN'S CORRESPONDENT KRISTEN SCHAAL.

KRISTEN, THANK YOU FOR COMING.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) SO WE'VE HEARD ABOUT "THE LIFE OF JULIA" DEPICTING THE JOURNEY

OF THE AVERAGE WOMAN.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

>> WELL, I LOVE IT.

POLITICIANS ARE FINALLY PANDERING TO ME IN A WAY I CAN RELATE TO.

>> WELL, NO POLITICIANS HAVE PANDERED TO WOMEN PREVIOUSLY.

IT'S NOT...

>> NOT WOMEN LIKE ME.

HERE, I'LL SHOW YOU.

>> Jon: NO!

NO!

I'LL JUST... WHAT ARE YOU...

>> RELAX, JON, RELAX.

IF I WAS SEDUCING YOU, YOU WOULD KNOW.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) I JUST WANT TO TAKE YOU THROUGH "THE LIFE OF KRISTEN."

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) IT WAS 1996 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION AND THE COVETED FEMALE

VOTER WAS THE SOCCER MOM.

F!RE ARE YOU GOING TO LET THEM TAKE THE BALL THE WHOLE TIME?

>> Jon: CLEARLY NOT A SOCCER MOM.

IT'S FINE.

>> I WAS 18 JUST OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL HANGING AROUND IN MY

BOYFRIEND'S PARENT'S GARAGE.

I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT SOCCER OR MINIVANS.

I WAS IN LOVE.

JON, COULD YOU PLAY MY BOYFRIEND?

>> Jon: I DON'T REALLY FEEL LIKE...

>> WAR ON WOMEN!

YOU GUYS SAW IT ON "THE DAILY SHOW"!

IT'S HAPPENING RIGHT HERE.

>> Jon: OKAY, EVERYTHING'S GOOD.

EVERYTHING'S GOOD.

>> HIS NAME IS KYLE AND HE WAS A BAD BOY.

HE COULDN'T BE TAMED WITH HIS BELONG BLOND HAIR AND TRIBAL NECK TATTOO.

PLAY THE DRUMS FOR ME, KYLE.

PLAY THE DRUMS LIKE YOU USED TO.

>> Jon: WHAT ARE THESE BEAKERS AND TUBES AND...

>> OH, THAT'S KYLE'S, UM,

CHEMISTRY SET?

>> Jon: AND THE BOX LABELED "METH"?

>> THAT'S A TYPO.

THAT'S WHERE WE KEPT OUR MATH.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: HOW COULD CANDIDATES HAVE CONNECTED WITH THE 18-YEAR-OLD KRISTEN?

>> I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE IF THEY LEGALIZED MATH.

(LAUGHTER) THAT CERTAINLY WOULD HAVE PUT BOB DOLE ON MY RADAR.

>> Jon: ALL RIGHT, WELL WHY DON'T YOU TAKE US TO AN ELECTION WHERE YOU DID VOTE.

>> THAT WOULD BE THE 2004 ELECTION.

SOCCER MOMS WERE OUT AND TERROR MOMS WERE IN.

-THE-THOUGHT AL QAEDA WAS OUT TO POISON HER KIDS YOGURT SO SHE PUT A PANIC ROOM IN HER MINIVAN.

>> Jon: YOU WEREN'T A TERROR MOM.

>> I WAS A WAIT TRES.

WAITING TABLES AT PLANET HOLLYWOOD.

THE ONLY THING MORE DEPRESSING THAN SERVING KINDERGARTEN COP POPPERS TO TOURISTS WHO DIDN'T

TRIP WAS DOING IT NEXT TO BRUCE WILLIS' TANK TOP FROM "THE 5th ELEMENT."

AND I HAD THE WORSE BOSS!

JON, WOULD YOU MIND.

>> Jon: NO...

>> WAR ON WOMEN AGAIN!

>> Jon: OKAY, I'M COMING OKAY.

I'M YOUR BOSS.

YOU.

GONNA NEED YOU TO WORK THANKSGIVING, CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR'S EVE.

>> CAN I AT LEAST GET MY BIRTHDAY OFF?

>> SURE.

>> Jon: NO, STAY IN CHARACTER.

>> Jon: NO.

>> YOU'RE SUCH A DICK!

SEE, I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT TERRORISTS I'M JUST TRYING TO PAY MY RENT ON MINIMUM WAGE AND

NOT GET CAUGHT STEALING DEMI MOORE'S SECRET CRUNCHY CHICKEN RECIPE.

"IT'S COVERED IN CAP'N CRUNCH.

SHH." SO THAT BRINGS US TO 2008.

(ROARING) I'M A GRIZZLY MOM!

DRILL, BABY, DRILL!

I'M GOING TO DECIDE THIS ELECTION EVEN IF I DON'T ACTUALLY EXIST!

ROAR!

>> Jon: I'M ASSUMING YOU AREN'T A BEAR SO THAT DIDN'T...

>> RIGHT AGAIN, JON.

I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL.

WHOA!

NO!

WHERE'S MY HAT?

(LAUGHTER) (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL GIVING BIRTH.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: I DIDN'T... I DO NOT REALIZE YOU WERE A MOM.

>> I'M NOT.

I WAS GIVING BIRTH TO A TWO-POUND FIBROID.

IT'S A A TUMOR THAT GROWS IN YOUR UTERUS, JON, AND THEY'RE DISGUSTING.

>> Jon: OKAY.

>> YEAH.

MINE WAS ENORMOUS BECAUSE IT WENT UNDETECTED BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE AND

WOMEN'S HEALTH CARE ALWAYS TAKES A BACKSEAT TO BONER PILLS.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

>> Jon: THAT IS TRUE.

WELL THE JULIA CHARACTER ADDRESSES WOMEN'S HEALTH CARE.

>> THAT'S WHAT MAKES HER SO EXCITING!

I'M JULIA!

OR MORE SPECIFICALLY THE COVETED FEMALE VOTER THAT IS THE NON-MOM MOM.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: SO THE NEW VOTING THE.

>> WHOA!

JON!

JON!

NO!

EVERYTHING'S WRONG!

>> Jon: WAIT, HOLD ON.

>> OH, THERE I AM.

(LAUGHTER) I GOT LOST IN YOUR EYES AND I FORGOT.

(APPLAUSE).

>> Jon: I'M SORRY.

I GOT LOST IN THE CUES.

SO NONMOM MOM.

THE NEW VOTING DEMOGRAPHIC IS NON-MOM MOMS?

>> ISN'T IT GREAT?

FOR THE FIRST TIME I'M BEING PANDERED TO BY THE TWO MALE CANDIDATES I GET TO CHOOSE BETWEEN.

PLEASE RUN FOR OFFICE, HILLARY CLINTON.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

>> Jon: KRISTEN SCHAAL,

EVERYBODY.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

>> Jon: MY GUEST THE DEAN OF WESTMINSTER ABBEY, HIS BOOK IS

CALLED "QUEEN ELIZABETH AND HER CHURCH, ROYAL SERVICE AT WESTMINSTER ABBEY."

PLEASE WELCOME TO THE PROGRAM JOHN HALL.

SIR.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: THIS IS VERY EXCITING,

SIR.

YOU ARE... HAVE A BOOK... THE QUEEN HAS HER ROYAL JUBILEE COMING UP, DOES SHE NOT?

>> DIAMOND JUBILEE.

60 YEARS, SINCE 1952 WHEN SHE BECAME QUEEN.

>> Jon: AND YOU WILL BE PRESIDING OVER THIS AFFAIR.

WILL THEY BE DOING THIS AT WESTMINSTER ABBEY?

>> NEXT YEAR FOR THE DIAMOND JUBILEE OF THE CORONATION.

SHE ACCEDED TO THE THRONE OF THE SIXTH OF FEBRUARY 1952.

>> Jon: OH, SURE, I THINK WE ALL REMEMBER THE SIXTH OF FEBRUARY.

>> REMEMBER IT VERY WELL.

>> Jon: I REMEMBER IT WAS FOUR DAYS AFTER GROUNDHOG DAY,

EVERYBODY.

>> AND THE CORONATION WAS IN 1953.

SO IT WILL BE THE 60th ANNIVERSARY OF THE CORONATION.

>> Jon: HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN THE DEAN OF WESTMINSTER ABBEY?

>> FIVE AND A HALF YEARS.

>> Jon: DO YOU OVERSEE ALL OF THE SERVICES INCLUDING THE WEDDINGS AND SUCH?

>> YES, THE ABBEY'S LIFE, WHICH IS DIVERSE AND RICH AND VARIED

WITH SERVICES EVERYDAY, FOUR SERVICES EVERYDAY, FIVE ON A SUNDAY.

THERE ARE SEVEN PRIEST THERE IS AND I LEAD THE TEAM, AS IT WERE.

>> Jon: YOU'RE DOING FIVE SHOWS ON A SUNDAY?

(LAUGHTER)

>> PLUS AN ORGAN RECITAL.

>> WOW.

AND YOU HAVE... HOW DO YOU ATTAIN THIS TYPE OF POSITION?

THIS IS QUITE AN HONOR?

>> .

>> IT'S AN EXTRAORDINARY PRIVILEGE AND IT'S A WONDERFUL PLACE TO BE.

THE ABBEY IS SO EXTRAORDINARY.

I WAS DOING A JOB FOR THE CHURCH BEFOREHAND AND THEN I HAD A PHONE CALL SAYING COULD I GO TO

TEN DOWNING STREET AND THERE WAS A LETTER FROM THE PRIME MINISTER AND HE WAS GOING TO REMY NAME TO

THE QUEEN FOR THIS POSITION SO I DIDN'T SLEEP A WINK THAT NIGHT.

>> Jon: DID YOU KNEE IN THE PHONE CALL OR DID THEY JUST SAY

"BE AT 10 DOWNING STREET" AND YOU DON'T KNOW.

>> I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT IT WAS ABOUT.

I HAD TO GO TO DOWNING STREET AND I WAS HANDED A LETTER FROM THE PRIME MINISTER.

>> Jon: SO YOU COULD HAVE OPENED IT UP AND IT COULD HAVE BEEN LIKE "HEY, YOU'RE

DEPORTED." (LAUGHTER) LIKE, IT COULD HAVE BEEN ANYTHING.

BUT IT WAS THIS WONDERFUL PRIVILEGE.

>> EXTRAORDINARY, YES,

ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL.

>> Jon: DO YOU LIVE ON THE GROUNDS?

>> I DO.

THE DEANERY IS A 14th CENTURY HOUSE.

>> Jon: OH!

>> IT WAS BUILT FOR THE ABBOT.

>> Jon: I'M SO SORRY.

SO YOU HAVE NO HEAT...

(LAUGHTER).

OR PLUMBING OR ANYTHING?

>> YES, IT'S BEEN MODERNIZED.

THE HITLER AIRPORTS HAD AN BIT OF IMPACT ON US IN 1941 SO THEY DID SOME UPDATING WORK.

BUT AT ONE END OF THE DEANERY I LOOK OVER THE ABBEY SO I'M THERE LOOKING THROUGH INTO THE WEST

END OF THE KNAVE.

SO IT'S AN EXTRAORDINARY PLACE TO BE.

>> Jon: WHAT AN INCREDIBLE...

DO YOU FEEL THE SPIRIT OF... FOR AMERICANS OUR HISTORY IS FOR US 240 YEARS, WHATEVER, AND WE FEEL

VERY GROWN UP BUT FOR YOU, YOUR HOUSE WOULD BE LIKE OUR GREAT,

GREAT, GREAT GRANDFATHER.

>> WE LOOK BACK TO 960 AND WE HAVE THE WHOLE OF THE HISTORY OF ENGLISH SPEAKING PEOPLE.

AS BARACK OBAMA SAID TO ME WHEN HE CAME TO THE ABBEY IN MAY LAST YEAR.

I ASKED HIM WHY DO SO MANY AMERICANS... SO MANY AMERICANS COME TO THE ABBEY, WHAT IS IT?

AND HE SAID WELL, THEY'RE LOOKING FOR THEIR ROOTS AND YOU CAN TELL THE WHOLE STORY OF THE

ENGLISH SPEAKING WORLD NOT JUST THROUGH THE UNITED KINGDOM AND THE COMMON WORLD.

>> Jon: HE DIDN'T TELL YOU THAT MOSTLY IT'S JUST BECAUSE IT'S ON THE TOUR.

(LAUGHTER) THE ROOTS THING, YES, THAT'S VERY SOPHISTICATED ANSWER.

MOST OF US WOULD BE LIKE "WE WERE WALKING BY AND...

(LAUGHTER).

>> WE HAVE AN AMBITION WHICH IS THAT OUR VISITORS, OUR TOURIST WILL BECOME PILGRIMS WHILE

THEY'RE THERE.

THAT THEY'LL FIND SOMETHING OF GOD THERE THAT WHICH WILL INSPIRE THEM AND UPLIFT THEM.

>> Jon: IT'S VERY DIFFICULT TO WALK INTO A HOUSE OF WORSHIP,

ESPECIALLY ONE THAT HAS WITHSTOOD THE TEST OF TIME, AND NOT FEEL SOME SENSE OF AWE OR A

SENSE OF WHAT THE PEOPLE THERE EXPERIENCE SOD MANY HUNDREDS OF YEARS AGO.

>> THERE'S SO MUCH HISTORY AND THERE AND SO MANY PEOPLE BURIED AND MEMORIALIZED THERE.

EVERYWHERE YOU GO THERE ARE POETS AND SCIENTISTS AND WRITERS, CHARLES DARWIN, CHARLES

DICKENS, SO MANY OTHER PEOPLE AND YOU HAVE A SENSE OF THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN GREAT AND

MADE A DIFFERENCE TO OUR LIFE AND WE'RE SURROUNDED BY THAT MEMORY AS WELL AS BEING SHOT

THROUGH TO THE E INTERNAL MEMORY AS WELL.

AND WHAT REALLY IS IMPORTANT FOR US.

>> Jon: DO YOU FIND YOURSELF WANDERING AMONGST THOSE NAMES OCCASIONALLY?

I JUST IMAGINE LOOKING FOR INSPIRATION.

THOSE ARE WONDERFUL PLACES TO BE TO...

>> IT'S COMPLETELY EXTRAORDINARY.

THE FIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING OF PRINCE WILLIAM AND CATHERINE...

>> Jon: OH, I DIDN'T KNOW THEY GOT MARRIED.

THAT'S WONDERFUL THAT HAPPENED.

(LAUGHTER)

>> IT WAS AN EXTRAORDINARY EVENT AND THE NIGHT BEFORE IT I WAS WANDERING THROUGH THE ROYAL

CHAPELS AND I WAS A LITTLE NERVOUS AND I WAS PRAYING FOR THEM AND HOPING THEY WERE GOING

TO BE FINE AND I JUST FELT THE WHOLE HISTORY OF THE PLACE AND THE WARMTH OF THE ABBEY AS IF IT

WERE RISING UP AND SUPPORTING THEM AND ME.

IT WAS A PRETTY EXTRAORDINARY EXPERIENCE.

>> Jon: VERY, VERY NICE AND LOVELY TO HAVE YOU ON THE SHOW.

LAST QUESTION.

THE QUEEN, BECAUSE YOU WORK FOR HER, YOU'RE A ROYAL PECULIAR.

WHEN SHE GREETS YOU...

(LAUGHTER).

DOES IT SOUND LIKE THIS IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM?

(AS THE QUEEN) HELLO!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) NOTHING?

>> NOT REALLY.

>> Jon: NOT AT ALL.

>> NOT REALLY, NO.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: I'M GOING TO PRETEND I DIDN'T HEAR THAT, THEN.

QUEEN ELIZABETH AND HER CHURCH IS AVAILABLE ON MAY 31.

JOHN HALL, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING WITH US.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Jon: THAT'S OUR SHOW, HERE IT IS, THE MOMENT OF ZEN.

>> THE MOLINAS ARE ALWAYS HUNGRY NOW NOT FOR FOOD THANKS TO THE

BOOK YOU MAY HAVE HEARD OF "50 SHADES OF GREY." THE ROMANCE INVOLVING BONDAGE

AND PRINCES WHO USE SOMETHING CALLED A FLOGGER ON

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