May 21, 2013 - Phil Jackson

  • Episode: 18106
  • (0)

Toronto's mayor learns that crack is whack, Al Madrigal tracks down former MSNBC pundit Dylan Ratigan, and Phil Jackson talks basketball and managing big egos.

>> Jon: HEY, WELCOME TO THE

DAILY SHOW, MY NAME IS JON

STEWART.

MAN WE HAVE A SHOW FOR YOU

TONIGHT.

COMING ON THE PROGRAM

TONIGHT, 11 TIME NBA

CHAMPION COACH PHIL JACKSON

WILL BE JOINING US.

PHIL JACKSON, THE LEAST

KNOWN MEMBER OF THE JACKSON

5.

LISTEN TO THIS, WHO'S THAT

TALL WHITE GUY?

STANDING NEXT TO TITO?

WE ALL KNOW NATIONAL

POLITICS IS-- BUT LOCAL

GOVERNMENT AIN'T BEAN BAG,

PEOPLE.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT ANY OF

THAT MEANT.

JUST PHRASES I PICKED UP

FROM WATCHING ANY RANDOM 30

SECONDS OF CHRIS MATTHEWS.

BUT MY POINT IS THIS, EVEN

MAYOR, MAYORS CAN FIND

THEMSELVES EMBROILED IN

SCANDAL WHETHER IT IS THE

WAY THEY REACT TO LOCAL

COMPLAINTS ABOUT RAISE

PROFILING OF HISPANICS.

>> WHAT ARE YOU DOING ABOUT

LATINO COMMUNITY TODAY.

>> I MIGHT HAVE TACOS WHEN I

GO HOME.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Jon: I WILL NEVER TIRE OF

TACO MAYOR.

LIKE THE SNACK HE BELIEVES

WILL EASE THE TENSION

BETWEEN HIS OFFICE AND

LATINO COMMUNITY, I CAN

NEVER GET ENOUGH.

(LAUGHTER)

BUT THE GREAT THING ABOUT

MAYORS IS THEY CAN MAINTAIN

THE EXCENTRICITIES THAT GET

SANDED OFF AND FOCUS GROUPED

OUT OF STATEWIDE OR NATIONAL

POLITICIAN, ENDEARING

POLICIES LIKE FEAR OF LARGE

BEVERAGES.

OR BEING A NINE AND A HALF

FINGERED BULGARIAN OR HAVING

MEAT AND CHEESE FOR A HEAD.

(LAUGHTER)

GUESS WHICH ONE OF THOSE

MAYORS IS NOT KOSHER.

GUY WITH THE CHEESEBURGER

FOR A HEAD.

BUT EVENING AMONGST THE

IDIOSYNCRATIC SOME MAYORS

STAND OUT.

FOR INSTANCE TORONTO MAYOR

FORMER CITY COUNCILMAN WHO

HAS BEEN VERY POPULAR IN

TORONTO FOR HIS LOVE OF

SPORTS-- AND HIS WARM

RELATIONS WITH THE PRESS,

YES, THE CAMERA JUST

ABSOLUTELY LOVES THIS MAYOR.

(LAUGHTER)

HOW YOU DON'T HAVE THAT SHOT

FROM THE POV.

CAMERA HE WALKED INTO,

CRIMINAL.

NOW OF COURSE DON'T THINK

THIS GUY IS JUST ALL

PRATFALLS WITH COME DEE, HE

HAS BEEN PHOTOGRAPHED WITH

HIS ARM AROUND A NEO-NAZI

AND EXPLAINED WHY STORES

SHOULD BE OPENED AN

STATUTORY HOLIDAYS THUSLY.

>> WHAT SOME ARE CALLING A

BACKHANDED COMPLIMENT TO

TORONTO'S AGING COMMUNITY.

>> THOSE ORIENTAL PEOPLE

WORKED LIKE DOGS.

THEY WORKED THEIR HEARTS

OUT.

THEY ARE WORKERS NONSTOP.

THEY SLEEP BESIDE THEIR

MACHINES.

THE ORIENTAL PEOPLE, THEY

ARE SLOWLY TAKING OVER.

>> Jon: PERHAPS HE'LL HAVE

TO HAVE SOME EGG ROLLS

TONIGHT TO MAKE UP FOR THAT.

AFTER REPEATED INSTANCES OF

THIS TYPE OF BEHAVIOR YOU

HAVE GOT TO WONDER, IS THIS

DUDE ON CRACK?

WELL, FUNNY STORY.

>> THERE'S A CELL PHONE

VIDEO THAT SHOWS THE MAYOR

ALLEGEDLY SMOKING A CRACK

PIPE.

>> Jon: HEY, HEY!

DON'T JUDGE HIM.

MAYBE HE'S CLEANING UP THE

CITY BY SMOKING ALL THE

CRACK IN IT.

YOU'RE NEXT, PROSTITUTION

RING.

(LAUGHTER)

THE CELL PHONE VIDEO WHICH

IS APPARENTLY VIEWED BY THE

TORONTO STAR AND THE WEB

SITE GAWKER, IT APPEARS THE

VIDEO SHOWS THE MAYOR OF

TORONTO SMOKING CRACK WITH

DRUG DEALERS.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE

DEPUTY MAYOR OF TORONTO.

>> CERTAINLY WE ALL KNOW

THAT VIDEOS CAN BE ALTERED.

AND WE CERTAINLY KNOW THAT

DRUG DEALERS CAN'T BE

TRUSTED.

>> Jon: PHOTOS CAN EASILY BE

ALTERED.

BUT VIDEOS?

THAT'S SOME JAMES CAMERON

[BLEEP]

(LAUGHTER)

BY THE WAY, IF YOU CAN ALTER

VIDEOS WHY WOULDN'T YOU

START WITH THESE TWO.

(LAUGHTER)

IT'S THE CAMERA ONE THAT

DOES IT EVERY TIME.

WE'VE ALL TRIPPED PLAYING

FOOTBALL BUT-- INTERESTINGLY

FORD'S PERSONAL LAWYER DOES

NOT APPEAR TO BE GOING THE

FAKE VIDEO ROUTE.

THE MAYOR'S LAWYER INTEND

INTEND-- INSTEAD ASKED QUOTE

HOW YOU CAN INDICATE WHAT

THE PERSON IS ACTUALLY DOING

OR SMOKING?

I MEAN THAT CLEAR PIPE IN

HIS HAND COULD BE ANYTHING

FROM ASTHMA MEDICINE TO

WONDER WOMAN'S FAMED

INVISIBLE PIPE OF TRUTH TO A

WATERFORD CRYSTAL KAZOO

CRACK.

IT COULD BE CRACK, I GUESS.

FOR MORE WE TURN TO OUR

SENIOR CANADIAN

CORRESPONDENT SAMANTHA BEE

AND JASON JONES.

THEY JOIN USNOW FROM

TORONTO.

SAM, THANKS FOR-- SAM.

>> YES.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

SAM, IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE

AWE AND JASON, WHERE IS

JASON.

>> OH, HE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

HE'S JUST BUYING SOME CRACK.

>> Jon: WAIT, JASON, CRACK.

>> YEAH, HE'S CANADIAN!

JON, WE ALL DO IT, SMOKING

CRACK IS ONE OF CANADA'S

MOST CHERISHED PASTIMES.

>> Jon: SO --

>> SORRY I'M LATE.

I WAS JUST BUYING SOME

CRACK.

(LAUGHTER)

IT'S ONE OF CANADA'S MOST

CHERISHED PASTIMES.

>> I ALREADY SAID THAT.

>> SORRY ABOUT THAT, I'M

JUST WHACKED OUT OF MY MIND

ON CRACK.

>> Jon: JASON, THAT'S AN

AWFUL LOT OF CRACK YOU'VE

GOT THERE.

>> WELL, I'VE GOT THREE KIDS

AT HOME, JON.

AND THEY ALL SMOKE CRACK.

>> Jon: I'M-- MY MINE IS

BLOWN HERE, YOU KNOW.

ITS CANADIAN PAST TIME I

THINK OF CANADA I THINK OF

POLITENESS AND CLEAN STREETS

AND --

>> WELL, SURE, JON, IT'S ALL

OF THAT ON THE SURFACE.

>> AND JUST UNDER THAT

SURFACE IS A THICK LAYER OF

CRACK.

>> YEAH.

>> JON, CANADA IS NOT LIKE

THE POSTCARDS YOU BUY AT

NIAGARA FALL, IT'S LIKE THE

POSTCARDS YOU BUY FROM THE

GUY IN TORONTO WHOSE [BLEEP]

YOU SUCK FOR CRACK.

>> Jon: WHAT?

YOU ARE ON-- YOU ARE ON

TELEVISION, SO YOU-- YOU

GUYS HAVE TO [BLEEP] FOR

CRACK?

>> UH, YEAH, YEAH, SURE, WE

HAVE TO.

(LAUGHTER)

>> JON, WHY DO YOU THINK

THEY ONLY SELL ALCOHOL AT

GOVERNMENT RUN DISPENSARIS.

CAN WANT-- WE CAN'T BE

TRUSTED WITH ANYTHING.

IT'S LIKE THAT OLD FRENCH

CANADIAN SAYING, S'IL EST

DANS LA MAISON.

>> IF IT'S IN THE HOUSE.

>> NOUS IL FUMEE.

>> WE WILL SMOKE IT.

>> APRES BEE COUP DEGRANDE

BLOW JOBS.

>> YOU CAN PROBABLY

TRANSLATE THAT ONE YOURSELF.

>> Jon: WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,

WHOA, JASON!

JAYSON, STOP THAT, ARE YOU

SMOKING CRACK RIGHT NOW?

>> IT'S 6 A.M. SOMEWHERE.

>> OH MY GOD, JON, ARE YOU

JUDGING US?

THIS IS OUR NATIONAL LETTER

TAJ.

NOT TO MENTION THE DRIVER OF

OUR ECONOMY.

CAN GA'S LARGE-- CANADA'S

LARGEST NATIONAL INDUSTRY IS

CRACK PRODUCTION.

AND OUR SECOND LARGEST

INDUSTRY IS GIVING BLOW JOBS

FOR CRACK!

>> Jon: THIS SIN SANE.

I MEAN IT'S LIKE CANADA IS

THAT FRIEND YOU HAVE IN HIGH

SCHOOL THAT ALL YOUR PARENTS

LOVE THEM BECAUSE HE'S SO

POLITE AND CALLS EVERYBODY

MR. AND MRS. S BUT YOU FIND

OUT HE IS A DATE RAPEST WITH

A ROOFY --

>> WLOE, EASY, WE ARE NOT A

NATION OF DATE RAPISTS.

WE ARE A NATION OF BLOW JOB

BESTOWING CRACK AFFICIONADOES.

BY THE WAY, YOU GOT ANY

CRACK, I'LL BLOW YOU FOR IT?

>> Jon: JASON, YOU HAVE A

WOL BACK!

>> OH, RIGHT, JEEZ, I FORGOT,

FORGOT ABOUT THIS.

IT'S THE CRACK.

IT REALLY [BLEEP] WITH YOUR

HEAD.

YOU WANT A HIT OF THIS?

>> IS THE-- THE CAPITAL OF

NUNAVUTT.

GIVE ME THE [BLEEP] CRACK,

GIVE ME --

>> ALL RIGHT.

>> Jon: SAMANTHA BEE AND

JASON JONES, EVERYBODY,

WE'L

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.

CABLE NEWS, CABLE NEWS, IT'S

LOUD, IT'S VAPID BUT AT

LEAST IT'S AVAILABLE-- WHAT

MORE COULD ANYONE WANT AL

MADRIGAL HAS THE SHOCKING

END.

>> EASY ACCESS TO FRESH AND

HEALTHY FOOD IS A CHALLENGE

FOR MILLIONS OF AMERICANS.

BUT SOME FARMERS IN SOUTHERN

CALIFORNIA THINK THEY HAVE

SOLVED THE PROBLEM BY USING

HYDROPONICS.

AN THEY'RE EVEN EMPLOYING

U.S. VETERANS TO DO IT.

>> WE'RE ABLE TO DELIVER A

MUCH MORE NUTRITIOUS, FASTER

GROWING, TASTIER AND MORE

ROBUST --

>> WAIT A SECOND.

HOLD ON.

I THINK I KNOW THIS GUY'S

BLOATED ANGRIER BROTHER.

>> THIS IS NOT SOME OPINION.

THIS IS A MATHEMATICAL FACT.

ARE YOU WASTING VALUABLE

OXYGEN.

>> CAN WE PLEASE CUT OFF

THIS MAN'S MICROPHONE.

HE HAS NO INTENTION OF

ANSWERING MY QUESTIONS.

>> NO, THAT IS I DID LAN MAD

I AGAIN FROM MSNBC.

BUT WHAT HE IS DOING HERE?

>> THERE WAS VERY LITTLE

INCENTIVE OR DESIRE FROM THE

LEFT OR RIGHT WING MEDIA

APPARATUS TO ACTUALLY

RESOLVE ANY PROBLEMS.

IT BECAME APPARENT THAT

THERE WAS MORE VALUE IN

WORKING WITH VETERANS TO

DEPLOY A HIGH TECHNOLOGY

HYDROPONIC ORGANIC FARMING

SYSTEM THAN THERE WAS IN

PARTICIPANTING IN A HOLLOW

POLITICAL DEBATE.

>> SO YOU THINK MAKING A

FARM THAT EMPLOYS VETERANS

IS MORE FULFILLING THAN

CABLE NEWS?

>> THAT'S CORRECT.

>> IT IS LIKE THE INCREDIBLE

HULK.

NO ONE CARES ABOUT

BILL --BY.

I WANT TO SEE YOU POUNDING

YOUR FIST ON THE DESK,

YELLING AT SOME BLOND CHICK.

>> WHY SIT AROUND ARGUING

WITH PEOPLE IN A CIRCLE WHEN

WE COULD ACTUALLY BE

BUILDING GREENHOUSES

CREATING JOBS.

>> I CAN STOP YOU THERE?

THIS DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT.

YOU CAN BRING THAT IN,

PLEASE?

>> THANKS.

>> NASS'S BETTER.

WE CAN TALK LIKE NORMAL

PEOPLE NOW.

>> WE'RE ON A FARM.

>> TRUST ME, I WORK IN

TELEVISION, YOU DON'T, ANY

MORE.

>> EVEN HIS FORMER

COLLEAGUES CAN'T BELIEVE

WHAT HE'S TURNING HIS BACK

ON.

>> WHAT WOULD POSSESS AN

ANCHOR OF A DAILY TELEVISION

PROGRAM TO WALK AWAY FROM

ALL HIS APPARENT SUCCESS.

>> BUT DE WALK AWAY.

AND IT WAS SHOCKING JUST HOW

FAR HE HAD FALLEN.

>> WAIT A SECOND, ARE THOSE

[BLEEP].

>> YES, THEY ARE.

>> WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU.

>> WHAT'S WRONG WITH CROCK.

>> NOTHING IF YOU ARE THREE.

ARE YOU A GROWN MAN.

>> WHAT IF I WAS BAREFOOT,.

>> FLIP A COIN.

>> WHAT KIND OF [BLEEP] AM

I?

>> IT WAS BECOMING CLEAR,

SINCE HE CHECKED OUT OF HIS

OLD LIFE HE HAD FORGOTTEN

EVERYTHING THAT TRULY

MATTERS.

>> BASICALLY WHAT YOU ARE

LOOKING AT IS A SYSTEM THAT

USE 90% LESS WATER, GROWS

THREE TIMES AS MUCH FOOD AT

THREE TIMES AS QUICKLY.

>> WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER SIDE

OF THAT ISSUE, WHAT DO THOSE

PEOPLE THINK?

>> WHAT DOW MEAN OTHER SIDE.

>> THE SIDE THAT DISAGREES

WITH WHATEVER YOU ARE SAYING.

>> WE'RE ACTUALLY JOINED BY

KEITH MYERS FROM LOVIT,

TEXAS WHO IS A PLUMBER

AND-- WATER ALL THE TIME.

KEITH WA, DO YOU THINK ABOUT

DYLAN'S PLAN FOR A WATERLESS

SOCIETY.

>> BEING A PLUMBER I MAKE MY

LIVING OFF WATER.

YOU TAKE AWAY THE WATER, YOU

TAKE AWAY MY JOB.

>> YEAH, I DON'T THINK

THERE'S ACTUALLY AN ISSUE.

THERE IS A MEANINGFUL WATER

SHORTAGE AROUND THE WORLD.

AND WHAT WE'RE DOING IS

CREATING JOBNESS.

>> I WILL HAVE TO STOP YOU

THERE, WE TAKE A QUICK BREAK

WITH MORE ON THE WATER ISSUE,

YOU ARE WATCHING TBS 247.

>> BLOEP BLOEP.

>> STEP UP.

BRING IT.

FARMING IS [BLEEP] WITH YOUR

HEAD.

>> AND OLD McDONALD HAD

PLENTY OF CRITIQUES FOR THE

STATE OF CABLE NEWS.

>> TOO FOCUSED ON FEELINGS

AND NOT FOCUSED ENOUGH ON

FACT.

THE SAME PUNDITS THAT SORT

OF ECHO WHAT THEY THINK,

THEY WILL USE PANELS TO

BASICALLY TO MAKE THE

AUDIENCE FEEL THAT THERE ARE

PEOPLE LIKE THEM THAT --

>> TRUE, LET'S FIND OUT.

>> I LIKE THE PANELS BECAUSE

IT'S LIKE A TEAM SPORT.

I'M THERE TO ROOT FOR MY

TEAM.

>> I LIKE TO KNOW OTHER

VIEWPOINTS, AND IT MAKES ME

FEEL USUALLY THAT I'M RIGHT.

AND I ALSO GET BORED IF IT'S

JUST ONE PERSON TALKING.

>> SO THIS PANEL IS PRO

PANEL.

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> YEAH.

>> YES.

>> DESPITE ALL THE EVIDENCE,

HE MAINTAINS HE MADE THE

RIGHT DECISION.

>> I FIND THE WORK AS I SAID

TO BE INCREDIBLY FULFILLING.

>> BUT IS HE TELLING THE

TRUTH?

>> WE'RE JOINED BY BODY

LANGUAGE EXPERT NOVA REID.

NOVA, DO YOU THINK DYLAN

HERE IS TRULY FULFILLED?

>> HIS BODY LANGUAGE IS

LEANING FORWARD, HIS

SHOULDERS ARE SLIGHTLY

JOSTLING FROM SIDE TO SIDE.

SOMEBODY THAT FULFILLED,

THEIR BODY LANGUAGED IS

LEANING BACK.

>> MORE RELAXED.

>> DYLAN WHAT DO YOU THINK.

>> I THINK I WAS WALKING UP

A HILL.

SO I LEAN BACK ON THE HILL I

WILL FALL DOWN, I HAVE TO

LEAN FORWARD TO WALK UP THE

HILL.

>> SHE'S THE EXPERT.

>> NOT FULFILLED, MAN.

>> WALKING UP A HILL, BRO.

>> IN THE END, WE ALL HAVE

TO REALIZE THAT IT'S THE

AUDIENCE WHO CALLS THE

SHOTS.

>> SO SHOW OF HANDS, HOW

MANY PEOPLE WANT TO SEE

DYLAN BACK ON TELEVISION?

>> THAT GUY [BLEEP] HATES

YOU.

>> BUT DON'T WORRY, FARMER,

IF YOU EVER GET TIRED OF

HIRING VETERANS AND FIXING

WORLD HUNGER, JUST REMEMBER

THIS GUY IS OUT THERE,

WAITING FOR ANOTHER SHOT.

>> AL MADRIGAL,

>> WELCOME BACK.

MY GUEST TONIGHT LEGENDARY

NBA COACH WHO HAS WON 11

CHAMPIONSHIPS AS THE COACH,

TWO AS AN NBA PLAYER.

HIS NEW BOOK IS CALLED 11

RING, THE SOLE OF SUCCESS.

PLEASE WELCOME TO THE

PROGRAM MR. PHIL JACKSON.

HOW ARE YOU?

>> WAIT A MINUTE, DO YOU

REALIZE WE'RE THE SAME SIZE

RIGHT NOW.

>> ALL RIGHT, THE BOOK IS

11-- LOOK AT THIS ONE OF

THESE MAKES YOU THE GREEN

LANTERN BUT WHERE-- BUT YOU

HAVE TWO PLAYER RINGS FROM

THE KNICKS.

>> THAT'S RIGHT.

>> WHERE ARE THEY?

>> THEY ARE NOT PART OF

COACHING.

THIS IS ABOUT LEADERSHIP AND

COACHING AND THAT KIND OF

STUFF.

THOSE ARE WARRIORSHIP AND

PLAYING, RIGHT.

>> BUT I AM-- THEY ARE

GREAT.

THEY ARE GREAT RINGS.

>> I HAVE TO SAY, SO MUCH OF

WHAT THIS BOOK IS ABOUT IS

MANAGING NOT THESE JUST

LARGER-THAN-LIFE PHYSICAL

PEOPLE BUT THE

LARGER-THAN-LIFE

PERSONALITIES.

THE CHAPTERS ON THE SHACK

AND KOBE RELATIONSHIP SEEM

ESPECIALLY TENUOUS, THAT

EACH, YOU KNOW, SHAQ AND

COULD BEE BOTH HAVE STRONG

PERSONALITIES T SEEMED LIKE

NAVIGATE FLAG WAS ONE OF THE

BIGGER CHALLENGES.

>> IT WAS PROBABLY ONE OF

THE HARDEST CHALLENGES I HAD

IN COACHING OVER ALL THOSE

YEARS, 20 YEARS THAT I

COACHED.

BECAUSE THERE WAS ALWAYS

THIS LITTLE TENSION ABOUT MY

TEAM, IT'S MY TEAM, PLAY

BALL MY STYLE, GET THE BALL

INSIDE, NO, I WANT TO DO

STUFF OUT THAT TYPE OF

THING.

>> Jon: BUT YOU TALK ABOUT

HOW YOU LET IT GO.

THERE IS A VERY -- THE BOOK

IS LACED WITH SORT OF MUTED

TEACHINGS OF SORT OF INNER

PEACE.

YOU SAID LET THEM BURN IT

OUT.

YOU NEVER INTERVENED IN

THEIR SQUABBLE, YOU LET THEM

BURN IT OUT.

HAVE YOU READ THIS BOOK, BY

THE WAY.

>> NO, I WROTE IT.

>> Jon: YOU SEEM SOMEWHAT

UNFAMILIAR WITH IT.

>> THE IDEA IS THAT

BASICALLY, YOU KNOW, YOU ARE

A PARENT, YOU HAVE TWO KIDS,

ARE YOU GOING TO GET

INVOLVED IN EVERY SQUABBLE

THAT HAPPENS IN YOUR HOUSE

THAT THEY-- YOU JUST CAN'T

DO THAT.

YOU WARE YOURSELF OUT TRYING

TO MONITOR ALL THAT.

SO THE BIG STUFF COMES ALONG,

YOU SAVE THE BIG STUFF FOR

THE RIGHT TIME.

>> Jon: YOU JUST SAVED MY

LIFE.

I HAVE TWO LITTLES AT HOME

AND I MONITOR EVERY des

CURRENT SEE.

NOW WHEN YOU WATCH COBE NOW,

ARE YOU TEMPTED TO-- I KNOW

THERE WAS A LOT OF TALK

ABOUT ALL THESE SUPERSTARS,

BUT DOW WATCH THAT, DOW WANT

TO CALL HIM, DO YOU SEND

ADVICE OR ARE YOU JUST

COMPLETELY HANDS-OFF IN

THESE SITUATIONS.

>> NO, IT'S HANDS-OFF.

YOU KNOW, KOBE TEXTED ME A

CONSIDERABLE AMOUNT OF TIME.

WE SEND MESSAGES BACK AND

FORTH.

AND I WILL JUST SAY, YOU

KNOW, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU

ARE-- OR THINGS WERE TOUGH,

YOU HAD TO DO SO MUCH WORK

LAST NIGHT, YOU KNOW, TRYING

TO SCORE, CARRY THE TEAM

WHEN YOU ARE DOWN, WHATEVER.

BUT WE NEVER GET INTO THE

OFFENSIVE END OF STUFF.

YOU KNOW, WE NEVER TALK

ABOUT THE DEFENSE EITHER.

WE JUST LET THE GAME COME

AND JUST TALK ABOUT THE

INDIVIDUAL GAME.

>> RIGHT.

>> SINCE I WAS ALMOST HIRED

BY THE LAKERS AND THEN NOT

HIRED BY THE LAKERS.

>> DID THEY CALL YOU AND TRY

AND GET YOU BECAUSE I WAS

UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT

YOU WERE NOT INTERESTED IN

COACHING ANY MORE.

>> THAT'S WHAT I TOLD-- THE

GENERAL MANAGER, THAT YOU

KNOW, I WASN'T INTERESTED IN

KOCHK.

BUT OF COURSE I LIVE IN.

WILL AMOUNT OF AND ALL THOSE

PLAYERS THAT WERE ON THE

LAKERS WERE PLAYERS THAT

WERE ON THE TEAM THAT I

COACHED BEFORE.

SO MY FIANCEE SAID WILL YOU

PLEASE LISTEN THEM AND LET

THEM EXPLAIN WHY THEY WANT

YOU TO COACH THE TEAM.

>> WHAT IS HER RELATIONSHIP

TO THE LAKERS, IF YOU MAY?

>> SHE IS THE VICE PRESIDENT

IN CHARGE OF FINANCE.

>> OH.

>> SO YOUR FIANCEE, THE VICE

PRESIDENT IN CHARGE SAYS YOU

SHOULD REALLY LISTEN THE

LAKERS AND YOU SAY HONEY,

YOU KNOW, I'M NOT THAT

INTERESTED?

DOES SHE ACCEPT THAT OR DOES

SHE PUT ON HER VICE

PRESIDENT HAT AND TRY AND

CONVINCE YOU.

>> SHE STAYED OUT OF IT SHE

DOESN'T WANT TO BE A PART OF

BASKETBALL.

SHE WANTS TO BE PART-- SHE

ALWAYS SAYS I MAKE THE

MONEY.

THEY SPEND THE MONEY, THAT'S

HER LIFE.

>> SO SHE'S NOT PART OF THE

DAY-TO-DAY OPERATIONS OF

BASKETBALL.

>> RIGHT.

>> SHE GETS THE MARKETING

AND THE TICKETS AND THAT

OTHER STUFF.

TV RIGHTS, ET CETERA.

>> RIGHT.

>> SO SHE SAYS WHEN PEOPLE

ASK YOU COULD STILL COACH,

TELL THEM I THINK YOU CAN.

EVEN THOUGH YOU DON'T WANT

TO.

>> WAS THERE A NUMBER?

IF THEY HAD HIT A NUMBER

WOULD YOU HAVE SAID ACTUALLY

I AM SOMEWHAT INTERESTED?

>> NO, I AM SUCH A FOOL, I

SAID MONEY'S NOT A PROBLEM.

>> SU DID SAY THAT.

>> YES.

>> Jon: ARE YOU A FOOL.

YOU'RE NOT, WHAT ABOUT THE

KNICKS, WOULD YOU EVER THINK

ABOUT COMING BACK-- WHAT

ABOUT THE NETS THEY ARE

LOOKING FOR A GUY.

>> THEY CALLED AND I SAID NO

THANK YOU.

I'M NOT INTERESTED IN

COACHING.

>> Jon: BUT SEE WHEN YOU SAY

THAT, BEHIND YOUR EYES IS

I'M INTERESTED IN COACHING.

LIKE YOU'RE NOT-- YOU'RE

SAYING TO ME I'M NOT

INTERESTED IN COACHING BUT

YOUR MUSTACHE SAYS GET ME ON

THE COURT.

YOU'RE NOT-- YOU SEE WHAT I

AM SAYING?

I DON'T BELIEVE IT I DON'T

BELIEVE IT.

>> YOU KNOW, MY HEAD MAYBE

INTERESTED IN COACHING BUT

MY BODY CAN'T TAKE IT

ANYMORE RZ REALLY, IT'S

GRUELING.

>> IT IS GRUELING, REAL

GRUELING RZ NO, I COULD SEE

THAT AND THE TRAVEL AND UP

AND DOWN, 82 GAME SEASON

THAT IS NO EASY PEASSY.

BUT IT IS STILL GOOD TO KNOW

YOU ARE INTERESTED IN

COACHING.

11 LINGS, THIS MAN HAS, TWO

AS A PLAYER.

ON THE BOOK SHELVES NOW,

GOOD WISDOM, PHIL JACKSON,

EVERYBODY.

>> THANK YOU.

(APPLAUSE)

Captioning sponsored by

COMEDY CENTRAL

Captioned by

Media Access Group at WGBH

access.wgbh.org

>> Jon: WELCOME BACK, LOOK,

OBVIOUSLY EVERYBODY HAS SEEN

THE IMAGES OF DEVASTATION IN

OKLAHOMA AND AS MUCH AS THEY

ALREADY APPEAR LIKE THEY'RE

GETTING OFF THE MATT AND

STARTING TO REBUILD,

INCREDIBLE RESILIENCE AND

TENACITY.

FOR ANYBODY WISHING TO SEND

DONATION AND HELP THERE ARE

GREAT ORGANIZATION TEXT RED

CROSS TO 90999, $10

DONATION.

AND OTHER GREAT

ORGANIZATIONS FOR THE

OKLAHOMA.GOV WEB SITE,

ANYBODY IN THAT SITUATION,

THEY SURE COULD USE SOME

EXTRA HELP.

THAT'S OUR SHOW, JOIN US

TOMORROW, HERE IT IS, YOUR

MOMENT OF ZEN.

>> I HOLLERED FOR MY LITTLE

DOG, AND HE DIDN'T ANSWER.

HE DIDN'T COME SO I KNOW

HE'S IN HERE SOMEWHERE.

>> THIS IS LIFE IN THE BIG

CITY.

>> THE DOG, THE DOG.

>> ITS DOG, HI, PUPPY.

>> THE DOG.

>> OH, WELL, I GOD ANSWERED

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